Bugs Bleat 1Q

"At" Work

2006-04-06T17:21:00.000-07:00

Men's Prayer Breakfast

2006-04-03T18:26:00.000-07:00

Guys react to Jim's fishing stories.

Jim points to the length of the fish.
All Ages and attention spans.
Robert hit a home run that morning.

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: On The Beach

2006-04-03T17:46:00.000-07:00

Volume 8, Issue 13 Friday, March 31, 2006

Hello All,

First thing first. If all goes according to plan, next weeks issue of “Da Bleat” will have a new address, www.bugsbleat2Q.blogspot.com I change the address every quarter because I haven’t figured out how to remove old posts yet and the size of the site gets too big.
While I was recuperating, Steve Ford helped me learn how to post photos to the Blog so maybe soon I’ll learn how to manage the size of my Blog files.
~~~~~
Wow! It’s been a busy week. First of all, thanks to y’all who prayed for my healing. My toe looks better than it has in a long time. Special thanks to Annette who lavished me with TLC. Also, as usual, I’m indebted to Doctor’s Murphy and Pullig, Nurses Nancy and Shelly and Glenda. I finally started back to full duty today and got out to do a safety audit. (I guess not everyone will be happy about that.)
~~~~~
Annette, Beth, Elaine, Miss Myrtle and much of the MCC staff have been in Tulsa for a Cell Groups conference at Victory Christian Center. - - http://www.victorytulsa.org/ - - Billy Joe & Sharon Daugherty are area natives whom we’ve known and admired since high school.
I didn’t go with the MCC group, mainly because I was still healing from the infection and also because they made a flying trip, going up Thursday morning and returning this evening.
Those of you who know me can appreciate that I prefer a leisurely trip, taking our time, stopping to smell the daisies (or more accurately to check out the outlet malls.)
~~~~~
At MCC we’ve been busy making DVDs, VHS and Audiotapes of our recent Gospel meeting with Jerry McGee. If you’d like a copy of one or more of the services, call Annette at 234-3225.
~~~~~
Here in Magnolia, the big news is the shooting of Travis Young at his laundry mat last week and his slow recovery. As of this writing, his assailants are still unknown.
The second big story is the hung jury in the murder trial that went on this week. Many people are upset that some jury members could have been unable to see that Justin Vansickle was guilty as sin. However, I contend that it would be very difficult to convict a young man of murder if there was any doubt about his guilt. Apparently, the defense was able to place a significant seed of doubt in the minds of six jurors.
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this weeks “Bleat” include Robert Davidson speaking at the MCC men’s prayer breakfast last Sunday. Robert did a great job, hitting a home run with the guys. Men and young men (teens) are welcome to join us each month at 7:45 in the G.C. Kirksey Life Center for breakfast, fellowship and an inspiring message from a local (or sometimes not so local) Christian.
~~~~~
American Journalist Hostage, Jill Carroll was freed this week. Praise God.
~~~~~
Brother Terry and Brother John are running in the Arkansas Grand Prix 10k at Little Rock this weekend [http://www.arkrrca.com/index.php?main=capitalcity]. They’re hoping to raise $10,000 to pay down the debt on the church. (Actually, Brother Terry said he was hoping to finish the 10k without looking like an old man.) Our hats are off to two great guys who inspire us every week. We’ll be posting the race results next week.
~~~~~
Also this weekend, Don Vash, one of our firefighters, is at the final four with his dad. We look forward to hearing the story of his trip next week.
~~~~~
We’ve been reading “The Great Influenza” by John M. Barry. One fact I was unaware of is that the natural home of the influenza virus is in birds. So the current “Bird Flu” is not an exception. The severity of it when it passes over to a human host is an exception.
~~~~~
If you are interested in joining the Magnolia Jaycees please contact Jamie Waller (234-5777) or Toby Stephens (234-4352).
~~~~~
Now that avian flu has spread through 29 countries in the last seven weeks, experts are conceding that there is little that can be done to stop its migration across the world. As the LAT puts it, "There is no way to stop wild birds, and they can't all be killed." Health officials expect it to hit North America this year. Initially, scientists hoped that killing chickens and ducks could contain the virus. But now, says one expert, "We cannot contain this thing anymore. Nature is in control." One alternative to containment is vaccinating birds, but that would be a "logistical nightmare."
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
And don’t forget that Daylight Saving Time begins at 2:00 a.m. on Sunday April 02.
~~~~~
"Help me know about Christ because The Da Vinci Code book has got me confused."

Already hundreds of emails like this are pouring in at Crosswalk, and with tens of millions expected to see "The Da Vinci Code" movie, even more people will be asking crucial faith questions. Clearly this is a critical time to reach seekers with the real Truth about Jesus.

Right now, you can help Campus Crusade for Christ mail a copy of Josh McDowell's new book, The Da Vinci Code: A Quest for Answers, to every home in the United States. To learn more, including how you can receive your own copy of Josh's book, click here.

Or visit: http://give2.ccci.org/featured/da-vinci-email

Thank you for your support of these efforts.
~~~~~
A Fuel leak apparently doomed Falcon 1, a commercial space company, created by a wealthy man with lofty ambitions. A small U.S. military payload was riding on last Friday's blastoff of Space Exploration Technologies' Falcon 1 rocket from a tiny island in the Central Pacific.

A successful maiden flight of this remarkably low-cost booster had the potential to shake up the business of spaceflight. But the Falcon 1 vehicle failed to prove it actually works as advertised.

Leading SpaceX is Elon Musk, a native of South Africa who amassed a fortune as co-founder of PayPal, the online payment system, and earlier the Zip2 software company. He dreams of human voyages to the planets and has spent "a very significant portion" of his net worth to begin a revolution.

Early insights from investigators examining Friday's failed launch of the first SpaceX Falcon 1 rocket suggest a fuel leak triggered a fire that ultimately brought down the booster, the company's founder said today.

"The good news is that all vehicle systems, including the main engine, thrust vector control, structures, avionics, software, guidance algorithm, etc. were picture perfect. Falcon's trajectory was within 0.2 degrees of nominal during powered flight," Elon Musk said in a statement posted this morning on his brother's Blog.

http://www.spaceflightnow.com/falcon/f1/prelaunch.html
~~~~~
Battle Brews As P__n Moves Into Mainstream
By DAVID CRARY
AP National Writer
NEW YORK

The industry's VIPs mingle at political galas and Super Bowl parties. Their product is available on cell phones, podcasts, and particularly the Internet _ there it's an attraction like no other, patronized by tens of millions of Americans.

It's p__nography. And if you're a consumer, John Harmer thinks you're damaging your brain.

Harmer is part of a cadre of anti-p__n activists seeking new tactics to fight an unprecedented deluge of p__n which they see as wrecking countless marriages and warping human sexuality. They are urging federal prosecutors to pursue more obscenity cases and raising funds for high-tech brain research that they hope will fuel lawsuits against p__n magnates.

"We don't think it's a lost cause," said Harmer, a Utah-based auto executive and former politician who's been fighting p__n for 40 years.

"It's the most profitable industry in the world," he said. "But I'm convinced we'll demonstrate in the not-too-distant future the actual physical harm that p__nography causes and hold them financially accountable. That could be the straw that breaks their back."

The activists' adversary is a sprawling industry that, by some counts, offers more than 4 million p__n sites on the Internet, that in the United States alone is estimated to be worth $12 billion a year. A tracking firm, comScore Media Metrix, says about 40 percent of Internet users in the United States visit adult sites each month.

P__n products are featured at popular sex expositions and retail chains such as Hustler Hollywood. Major hotels provide in-room p__n, and adult film stars are now mainstream celebrities. Mary Carey attended a VIP Republican fundraiser in Washington in mid-March; Jenna Jameson's "How to Make Love Like a P__n Star" hit the best-seller lists and she hosted a racy pre-Super Bowl party in Detroit in February.

As much as there is national consensus on the evils of child p__nography, there is none whatever on p__n featuring adults and marketed to them. It's more pervasive than ever, yet activists and experts disagree bitterly over the extent of harm it causes.

"The form of entertainment is no problem," said Paul Cambria, general counsel for the p__n industry's Adult Freedom Foundation. "There are individuals who are going to react abnormally to normal material, but it's not a problem for the average person."

For every couple driven apart by p__n, there are others whose relationship is enlivened, Cambria argued. He dismissed contentions that p__n is highly addictive or brain damaging.

"Some people lie about it," Cambria said. "It's their way of excusing personally unacceptable conduct _ 'It wasn't me, it was p__n.'"

Such attitudes infuriate experts on the other side who say online p__n is as addictive as crack cocaine.

"The Internet is the perfect delivery system for anti-social behavior _ it's free, it's piped into your house," said Mary Anne Layden, a psychologist and addiction expert at the University of Pennsylvania. "Internet p__n is probably the biggest miseducation system we can devise in terms of sexuality, misuse of women."

She says many of her patients, rather than improving their sex lives with p__n, suffer sexual dysfunction.

Interest in p__n is age-old and normal, says psychologist David Greenfield of West Hartford, Conn., an expert on Internet behaviors, but it can become a destructive obsession for a minority who indulge in it at the expense of healthy relationships. Easy availability is part of the issue.

"It's not your father's p__n," he said. "With little or no effort, as long as you have a computer, you can access some of the most stimulating content on the planet. There's no delay, no person watching. It's designed to very quickly get to a point where you're not in full control."

He estimates that for up to 10 percent of p__n users, relationships suffer _ with many husbands spending so much time online that they cease to have sex with their wives.

Divorce lawyers report that p__n use is an increasingly common factor in marriage breakups: It can cause immense pain when a wife discovers her husband's p__n habit.

"I compare it to your house burning down," said Laurie Hall, who divorced her husband after writing a book called "An Affair of the Mind," about his 20-year obsession with p__n.

"It destroys your sense of personhood when you bring all that you are into a relationship and someone chooses to ignore that," she said. "It eats away at the heart of the family."

Across America, compulsive p__n use has spawned hundreds of support groups, treatment programs and Web sites where heartbroken spouses _ mostly wives _ swap stories of their mates' obsessions.

Polls suggest most Americans believe p__n should be off-limits to minors and available legally for adults. But groups such as Morality in Media think the public favors tougher enforcement of obscenity laws against hard-core p__n; it operates a Web site that forwards obscenity complaints to federal officials.

"We're not going to get rid of all of it, but we can push it back into the gutter as far as humanly possible," said Morality in Media president Robert Peters, a Dartmouth-educated attorney who struggled in his 20s to kick a p__n habit that started in grade school.

"It was hell," said Peters, recalling a six-year stretch where he regularly visited p__n outlets on New York's 42nd Street. "It's a very hard habit to break."

Mark Laaser of Eden Prairie, Minn., says he frequently sought out p__nography and engaged in extramarital sex for more than 20 years, starting in college and continuing through a career as pastor and counselor. He now runs workshops, and consults with church congregations on the issue.

"I've seen the damage it does to marriages, to families," he said.

Though he stressed the need for individual willpower, Laaser also faulted the p__n industry for employing aggressive online technologies that "besiege you."

"Sometimes it's not a matter of free will," he said. "It's a matter of invasion."

Another self-described former addict is Phil Burress, head of a Cincinnati-based conservative group called Citizens for Community Values.

Like many conservatives, he had hopes that the Bush administration would reverse Clinton White House policy and step up prosecutions of adult-p__n obscenity cases as well as child p__n cases. Thus far, Burress is disappointed.

"Five years into this administration, they get an F," he said.

Still, Burress is encouraged by the recent formation of an FBI anti- obscenity squad and the appointment of Brent Ward, a former U.S. attorney who combatted p__n in Utah, to head an obscenity prosecution task force.

The Justice Department defends its record, saying it has indicted dozens of people on obscenity charges since 2001 and suggesting the pace will increase. But with a vast array of potential targets, and many other priorities, prosecutors must choose their battles carefully.

One pending case involves obscenity charges against a California couple whose company sold p__nographic videos depicting simulated rape and murder. The charges carry a maximum penalty of 50 years in prison plus $7.5 million in fines.

The bottom line, perhaps, is that each side in the debate can make points that seem unassailable.

"Everyone agrees that tens of millions of Americans consume p__n. ... ministers, PTA members, policemen, teachers, soldiers, dentists and Boy Scout leaders," argues California sex therapist Marty Klein. "The overwhelming majority of them don't rape strangers or emotionally abandon their wives."

But Layden, the Penn addiction expert, refuses to see p__n as mostly harmless.

"When I ask men who are sex addicts if they would want their wife or daughter to be in p__n, 100 percent say, 'No,'" she said. "They want it to be somebody else's wife or daughter. They know this material is damaging."

http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/04/01/D8GNHC20D.html
___
On the Net:
P__n industry group: http://www.adultfreedomfoundation.org/
Anti-p__n group: http://www.obscenitycrimes.org/
~~~~~
Army Bans Use of Privately Bought Armor
By LOLITA C. BALDOR
Associated Press Writer
WASHINGTON

Soldiers will no longer be allowed to wear body armor other than the protective gear issued by the military, Army officials said Thursday, the latest twist in a running battle over the equipment the Pentagon gives its troops in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Army officials told The Associated Press that the order was prompted by concerns that soldiers or their families were buying inadequate or untested commercial armor from private companies _ including the popular Dragon Skin gear made by California-based Pinnacle Armor.

"We're very concerned that people are spending their hard-earned money on something that doesn't provide the level of protection that the Army requires people to wear. So they're, frankly, wasting their money on substandard stuff," said Col. Thomas Spoehr, director of materiel for the Army.

Murray Neal, chief executive officer of Pinnacle, said he hadn't seen the directive and wants to review it.

"We know of no reason the Army may have to justify this action," Neal said. "On the surface this looks to be another of many attempts by the Army to cover up the billions of dollars spent on ineffective body armor systems which they continue to try quick fixes on to no avail."

The move was a rare one by the Army. Spoehr said he doesn't recall any similar bans on personal armor or devices. The directives are most often issued when there are problems with aircraft or other large equipment.

Veterans groups immediately denounced the decision.

Nathaniel R. Helms, editor of the Soldiers for the Truth online magazine Defense Watch, said he has already received a number of e- mails from soldiers complaining about the policy.

"Outrageously we've seen that (soldiers) haven't been getting what they need in terms of equipment and body armor," said Sen. Christopher Dodd, D-Conn., who wrote legislation to have troops reimbursed for equipment purchases. "That's totally unacceptable, and why this directive by the Pentagon needs to be scrutinized in much greater detail."

But another veterans group backed the move.

"I don't think the Army is wrong by doing this, because the Army has to ensure some level of quality," said Paul Rieckhoff, executive director of Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America. "They don't want soldiers relying on equipment that is weak or substandard."

But, Rieckhoff said, the military is partially to blame for the problem because it took too long to get soldiers the armor they needed. "This is the monster they made," he said.

Early in the Iraq war, soldiers and their families were spending hundreds or even thousands of dollars on protective gear that they said the military was not providing.

Then, last October, after months of pressure from families and members of Congress, the military began a reimbursement program for soldiers who purchased their own protective equipment.

In January, an unreleased Pentagon study found that side armor could have saved dozens of U.S. lives in Iraq, prompting the Army and Marine Corps to order thousands of ceramic body armor plates to be shipped to troops there this year.

The Army ban covers all commercial armor. It refers specifically to Pinnacle's armor, saying that while the company advertising implies that Dragon Skin "is superior in performance" to the Interceptor Body Armor the military issues to soldiers, "the Army has been unable to determine the veracity of these claims."

"In its current state of development, Dragon Skin's capabilities do not meet Army requirements," the Army order says, and it "has not been certified to protect against several small arms threats that the military is encountering in Iraq and Afghanistan."
The Marine Corps has not issued a similar directive, but Marines are "encouraged to wear Marine Corps-issued body armor since this armor has been tested to meet fleet standards," spokesman Bruce Scott said.

Military officials have acknowledged that some troops _ often National Guard or Reservists _ went to war with lesser-quality protective gear than other soldiers were issued.

"We'll be up-front and recognize that at the start of the conflict there were some soldiers that didn't have the levels of protection that we wanted," Spoehr said. Now, he added, "we can categorically say that whatever you're going to buy isn't as good as what you're going to get" from the military.

In interviews Thursday, Army officials said aggressive marketing by body armor manufacturers was fueling public concerns that troops are not getting the protection they need.

Army Lt. Col. Scott Campbell said the Army has asked Pinnacle to provide 30 sets of the full Dragon Skin armor so it can be independently tested. He said Pinnacle has indicated it won't be able to provide that armor until May, and the company said that is still the plan.

Campbell said initial military tests on small sections of the Dragon Skin armor had disappointing results. He said Pinnacle has received $840,000 in research funding to develop improved armor.

Spoehr said he believes the directive will have little impact on soldiers in Iraq or Afghanistan because it's likely that nearly all are wearing the military-issued body armor.

There have been repeated reports of soldiers or families of soldiers buying commercial equipment or trying to raise thousands of dollars to buy it for troops who are preparing to deploy overseas.
___

On the Net:
Defense Department: http://www.defenselink.mil
Pinnacle Armor: http://www.pinnaclearmor.com
http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/03/30/D8GM6F6G6.html
~~~~~
Some Marines Declining Extra Body Armor
By ANTONIO CASTANEDA
Associated Press Writer
HUSAYBAH, Iraq

Extra body armor _ the lack of which caused a political storm in the United States _ has flooded in to Iraq, but many Marines here promptly stuck it in lockers or under bunks. Too heavy and cumbersome, many say.

Marines already carry loads as heavy as 70 pounds when they patrol the dangerous streets in towns and villages in restive Anbar province. The new armor plates, while only about five pounds per set, are not worth carrying for the additional safety they are said to provide, some say.

"We have to climb over walls and go through windows," said Sgt. Justin Shank of Greencastle, Pa. "I understand the more armor, the safer you are. But it makes you slower. People don't understand that this is combat and people are going to die."

Staff Sgt. Thomas Bain of Buffalo, N.Y., shared concerns about the extra pounds.

"Before you know it, they're going to get us injured because we're hauling too much weight and don't have enough mobility to maneuver in a fight from house to house," said Bain, who is assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 6th Marine Regiment. "I think we're starting to go overboard on the armor."

Since the insurgency erupted in Iraq, the Pentagon has been criticized for supplying insufficient armor for Humvees and too few bulletproof vests. In one remarkable incident, soldiers publicly confronted Secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld about the problem on live television.

Hometown groups across the United States have since raised money to send extra armor to troops, and the Pentagon, under congressional pressure, launched a program last October to reimburse troops who had purchased armor with their own money.

Soldiers and their parents spent hundreds, sometimes thousand of dollars, on armor until the Pentagon began issuing the new protective gear.

In Bain's platoon of about 35 men, Marines said only three or four wore the plates after commanders distributed them last month and told them that use was optional.

Top military officials, including Secretary of the Army Francis Harvey, acknowledge the concerns over weight and mobility but have urged that the new gear be mandatory.

"That's going to add weight, of course," said Harvey. "You've read where certain soldiers aren't happy about that. But we think it's in their best interest to do this."

Marines have shown a special aversion to the new plates because they tend to patrol on foot, sometimes conducting two patrols each day that last several hours. They feel the extra weight.

In Euphrates River cities from Ramadi and Romanna, lance corporals to captains have complained about the added weight and lack of mobility. But some commanders have refused to listen. In the former insurgent stronghold of Fallujah, for example, commanders require use of the plates. End of story.

The Marine Corps has said a total of 28,000 sets of the plates, officially called small-arms protective inserts, or side SAPIs, will be in combat zones by April. The Army has said it is hoping to have 230,000 sets of plates in the field this year.

Last year, a study by the Armed Forces Medical Examiner said dozens of Marines killed by wounds to the torso might have survived had the larger plates been in use.

"I'm sure people who ... lost kidneys would have loved to have had them on," said 2nd Lt. William Oren, a native of Southlake, Texas, who wears the plates. "More armor isn't the answer to all our problems. But I'll recommend them because it's more protection."

Some Marines have chosen to wear the plates, particularly those in more vulnerable jobs such as Humvees turret gunners or those who frequently travel on roads plagued by roadside bombs.

But many Marines _ particularly those who conduct foot patrols also carrying weapons, extra ammunition, medical equipment, night vision goggles, food and water _ say the extra armor is not worth it, especially when the weather becomes unbearably hot.

"When you already have 60, 70 pounds on and you add 10 pounds when you go patrolling through the city or chasing after bad guys, that extra 10 pounds is going to make a difference. You're going to feel it," said Lance Cpl. David Partridge from Bangor, Maine.

Many Marines, however, believe the politics of the issue eventually will make the plates mandatory.

"The reason they issued (the plates), I think, is to make people back home feel better," said Lance Cpl. Philip Tootle of Reidsville, Ga. "I'm not wishing they wouldn't have issued them. I'm just wishing that they wouldn't make them mandatory."

http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/03/26/D8GJGBC02.html
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com. Older issues can be found at bugsbleat.blogspot.com, bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com, and bugsbleat4q.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.55
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - We’re sharing recipes from Shannon Voigt’s new Taylor Recipe Book
QUICK TORTELINI SOUP - a future addition to the recipe book by “Bug”

Ingredients
3-4 cans chicken broth
2 eggs
1/8 c. milk
1/4 c. grated cheese
1 pkg. tortellini
1 tbsp. chives
Pinch pepper

Method:
In large soup pot, add chicken broth. Beat 2 eggs, milk, and cheese together. Bring soup to a slow boil and add egg mixture very slowly while stirring. Add chives and pepper. Add ravioli or tortellini, cook until al dente and serve.

While the soup is cooking, put a piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet and spoon Parmesan cheese on it, like you’re placing cookie dough. Heat in a 325 degree oven until lightly browned and you’ll have parmesan cheese “crackers” for your soup.
~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

Fathomable Zealotry
Islam and the Clash of Civilizations
March 31, 2006

On Wednesday, Mark Earley reported the good news about the release of Abdul Rahman, the Afghan Christian who was facing execution for “apostasy” from Islam. As I record this, Rahman is free from jail and has fled to Italy—a smart move since prominent imams are calling for him to be killed for his profession of Christ.

As outrageous as extra-judicial killings are, a government executing someone for religious reasons is even worse. And that remains a very real possibility in Afghanistan and other parts of the Islamic world.

After all, Rahman was set free only because he was judged to be insane. That adjudication reminds me of the Soviet Union: If someone was a Christian or other kind of dissident, they were called insane and put in an institution. It was a way of punishing and controlling the Church—the stuff of tyrants.

And tyranny is still what we have in Afghanistan. Even after the Taliban was driven out of power, Afghans are not free to exercise their conscience. Their constitution says that Afghanistan will be governed by sharia law—the same law that makes conversion a capital offense. For our foreign policy to have credibility, we must demand not just that Rahman be set free, but also that Afghanistan and Iraq, countries we are liberating, respect basic human rights.

The events of the past week have taught us lessons about the nature of the foe we face in the global war on terror. As columnist Richard Cohen wrote, “The murder of a person for his religious belief ought to be inconceivable.” But it’s not, and Cohen, more than some other commentators, understands why.

As Cohen wrote, the threat to Rahman’s life doesn’t come from a “few crazed governments,” a “rogue government,” or even “a solitary crazy prosecutor.” It comes from “an entire society. It is not a single judge who would condemn [Rahman] but a culture.”

Specifically, it’s a culture shaped by an Islamic worldview. Sadly, what’s true of Afghanistan is true of much of the Islamic world. As Investor’s Business Daily editorialized, Islam “mandates warfare against unbelievers.” Now, this puts the lie to the mealy-mouthed proclamations of many politicians that Islam is just a “religion of peace.”

Thankfully, most Muslims “do not act out on [Islam’s] violent commands.” But Islam sees itself in a state of war with Western civilization, which was shaped by the Judeo-Christian tradition.

The incompatibility of this worldview led Harvard professor Samuel Huntington, in his 1990s book The Clash of Civilizations, to predict that the clash between Islam and the West would be the great struggle of the twenty-first century. He is a prophet.

The question is, as with all prophets: Will we listen? Will we acknowledge that we are in the midst of a life-and-death struggle between two hostile worldviews? To listen to America’s politicians say we have to bring the troops home, three years is long enough to fight, is tragically comical.

For nothing in Islam’s fourteen-hundred-year history suggests that it is prepared to declare a truce. I’ve written and spoken about this at length. You can call us here today (1-877-322-5527), and we’d love to send you a transcript of a speech I gave on the clash of civilizations—because you and I need to understand the true conflict we are in: It is a war of worldviews.

--------------------------------------------
For further reading and information:
Today’s BreakPoint offer: Call 1-877-322-5527 to request a free transcript of Chuck Colson’s speech given to the Wilberforce Forum Centurions in 2006, “Clash of Worldviews: Defending the Truth.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 060329, “One Down, Millions to Go: Abdul Rahman and Religious Freedom.”

BreakPoint Commentary No. 060321, “Democratic Apostasy: The Martyrdom of Abdul Rahman.”

“Afghan Convert Formally Granted Asylum,” CBS News, 30 March 2006.

Richard Cohen, “Unfathomable Zealotry,” Washington Post, 28 March 2006, A23.

“Religion of Peace?” Investor’s Business Daily, 27 March 2006.

Dr. Timothy George, Is the Father of Jesus the God of Muhammad?: Understanding the Differences between Christianity and Islam (Zondervan, 2002).

http://www.pfm.org/AM/Template.cfm?Section=BreakPoint1

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004 Prison Fellowship.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
metier: an occupation, especially in which one excels.
bellwether: a leader or leading indicator.
confluence: a flowing or coming together.
superfluous: more than is wanted or is sufficient.
invidious: tending to provoke envy or ill will.
benignant: kind; gracious; favorable.
edacious: given to eating.
from Dictionary.Com

~~~~~
"Knowledge is of two kinds. We know a subject ourselves, or we know where we can find information upon it." - Samuel Johnson

"What is time? The shadow on the dial, the striking of the clock, the running of the sand, day and night, summer and winter, months, years, centuries - these are but arbitrary and outward signs, the measure of Time, not Time itself. Time is the Life of the soul." - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

"Great thoughts reduced to practice become great acts." - William Hazlit

"If we don't expect, we have all things." - Buddha

"The whole secret of life is to be interested in one thing profoundly and in a thousand things well." - Horace Walpole

"A popular Government, without popular information, or the means of acquiring it, is but a Prologue to a Farce or a Tragedy; or, perhaps both. Knowledge will forever govern ignorance: And a people who mean to be their own Governors, must arm themselves with the power which knowledge gives." - James Madison

"The real voyage of discovery consists, not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust

"The degree of one's emotion varies inversely with one's knowledge of the facts -- the less you know the hotter you get." - Bertrand Russell
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

Soldiers Thank Church for Protecting Them in Prayer During Deployment in Afghanistan
M. B. Taboada/Teresa Neumann Reporting (Apr 1, 2006)
For an entire year, the flock at Grant African Methodist Episcopal Worship Center in Austin, Texas, would stop everything they were doing at noon and pray for the safe return of the soldiers of the 11th Area Support Group in Afghanistan.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2321

Australia's Prime Minister Will Not Allow the Institution of Marriage to be "Undermined"
BBC Staff / Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 31, 2006)
"There is a special place in Australian society for the institution of marriage, as historically understood."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2317

Miraculously Recovered Mine Worker, Randal McCloy, Home from Rehab Center Today
News Staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 30, 2006)
"Because of [God], I am here."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2314

American Journalist Hostage, Jill Carroll Freed Today
News staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 30, 2006)
"I'm just happy to be free. I want to be with my family."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2313

Africans Greet Solar Eclipse with Cries of "Hallelujah" and "Praise the Lord"
News staff / Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 29, 2006)
Crowds from around the world were treated to an awesome celestial display today as a total solar eclipse cast its shadow across the earth.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2309

Anti-Americanism is "Madness" Says Tony Blair - Use Engagement, not Isolation, to Solve World Problems
AFP Staff / Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 27, 2006)
"The danger with America today is not that they are too much involved...We need them involved. We want them engaged."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2301

Christian Convert; Abdul Rahman Released Today - Case Dismissed for Now, But Will Go Back to Prosecution
Jeff King / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 26, 2006)
"Please keep Rahman in prayer. He will be in grave danger as long as he remains in the country . . ."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2300

New Zealand Woman Follows Her Call to Bring Hope and Home to Romanian Orphans
Lavinia Ngatoko / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 26, 2006)
Reporting for Challenge Weekly and ANS, Lavinia Ngatoko tells about Sue Van Schreven, a caring woman from New Zealand who decided to follow through on the compassionate heart she has for orphans, establishing Orphans Aid International.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2298

German Scientists Discover that Adult Stem Cells in Mice Can Mimic Embryonic Stem Cells
News staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 25, 2006)
"These isolated spermatogonial stem cells respond to culture conditions and acquire embryonic stem cell properties."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2295
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GCF: On The Beach

Emailed to me from another humor list (Marty's Joke of the Day) -Tom To subscribe to Marty's Joke of the Day, send a blank email to: martysjotd-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@egroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
------------------------------------------

Little Johnny was walking down the beach, and as he did so, he saw a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand.

He walked up to her and asked, "Do you go to church every week?"

"Yes." she replied.

"Do you pray often?" the boy asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."

"Do you know the Ten Commandments?"

"Yes, I do." she answered, with a smile.

"Do you keep them all?" Johnny asked.

She nodded her head, "Yes, I do." she said.

With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my dollar while I go swimming?"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Were You Born In A Barn?

Emailed to me from another humor list (The Funnies) -Tom To subscribe to The Funnies, send a blank email to: andychaps_the-funnies-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
-----------------------------------------

Our son was constantly wandering in and out of the house, leaving the front or back door wide open.

"Once and for all, will you PLEASE close that door!" my exasperated wife pleaded one day. "Were you born in a barn?"

"No, I was born in a hospital," he replied, smirking, "...with automatic doors."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Rice Preference

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
---------------------------------------------------

The young woman really thought she'd been very patient, through a protracted period of dating with no talk of marriage.

One night her steady boyfriend took her to a Chinese restaurant. As he perused the menu, he casually asked her, "So . . . how do you like your rice? Boiled? Steamed? Or fried?"

Without missing a beat, she looked over her menu at him and replied clearly, "Thrown."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Waitress Date

Emailed to me another humor list (Good Clean Funnies List) -Tom To subscribe The Good Clean Funnies List, (not to be confused with this list, which is Good Clean Fun) send an email to: gcfl-request@gcfl.net with subject = add
---------------------------------------------------

A customer wanted to ask his attractive waitress for a date, but couldn't get her attention. When he was able to catch her eye, she quickly looked away. Finally he followed her into the kitchen and blurted out his invitation. To his amazement, she readily consented.

He said, "Why have you been avoiding me all this time? You wouldn't even make eye contact?"

"Oh," said the waitress, "I thought you wanted more coffee."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Shipwrecked

Emailed to me from another humor list (Marty's Joke of the Day) -Tom To subscribe to Marty's Joke of the Day, send a blank email to: martysjotd-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
----------------------------------------------------

The shipwrecked mariner had spent a number of years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him. When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him, "With the captain's compliments. He said to read through these and let us know if you still want to be rescued."
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / The trouble with doing \ \_/ ////
\ / something right the first time \ /
\ _/ is that nobody appreciates \_ /
/ / how difficult it was. \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / I don't exercise at all. \ \_/ ////
\ / If God had meant me to touch \ /
\ _/ my toes, He would have put \_ /
/ / put them on my knees. \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / I want less work and \ /
\ _/ more money for not doing it. \_ /
/ / \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Always remember to pillage \ /
\ _/ BEFORE you burn. \_ /
/ / \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / The more you know, \ /
\ _/ the more you know \_ /
/ / you ought to know. \ _ ____________________________ _
/ ) Thomas S. Ellsworth ( / / tellswor@slonet.org \ _( (_ http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor _) )_
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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[GCFL.net] Place To Stay For The Weekend

I'm looking for a place to stay for the weekend because my wife kicked me out. For some reason she's mad at me.

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first: the truck, the car, fishing, golfing, watching TV. You know, important things.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.

I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass," I said, "you might as well sweep the sidewalk."

After that she just lost it and kicked me out! Can you believe that?

Received from Tim Doubledee.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Discrimination Lawsuit

An atheist was quite incensed over the preparation for Easter and Passover holidays and decided to contact the local ACLU about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while the atheists had no holidays for them to celebrate.

The ACLU jumped on the opportunity to once again pick up the cause of the downtrodden and assigned their sharpest attorney to the case.

The case was brought up before a learned judge who, after listening to the passionate presentation by the ACLU representative, promptly banged his gavel and said, "Case dismissed!"

The ACLU lawyer stood up and objected to the ruling and said, "Your honor, how can you dismiss this case? Surely the Christians have Christmas, Easter, and many other observances. And the Jews--why, in addition to Passover, they have Yom Kippur and Hanukkah ... and yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"

The judge leaned back in his chair and simply said, "Obviously your client is too confused to know about or for that matter even celebrate the atheists' holiday!"

The ACLU lawyer pompously said, "We are aware of no such holiday for atheists--just when might that be?"

The judge said "Well, it comes every year at the same time--April 1st!"

Received from jhughey.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Easter Funny

After the egg hunt on Easter Sunday, the young farm boy decided to play a prank. He went to the chicken coop and replaced every single egg with a brightly colored one.

A few minutes later the rooster walked in, saw all the colored eggs, then stormed outside and beat up the peacock!

Received from Paula Sanning.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Why Some Bachelors Can't Cook

/* We received a great tip from Abraham, one of our members, that we thought was worth sharing with everyone. If you set your browser's home page to http://www.gcfl.net/randomfunny.php you will get a random funny every time you open your browser! How cool is that? Thanks Abraham! */

Two bachelors were talking. One said to the other, "I got a cookbook the other day, but I can't do any of the recipes."

"Why? Are they too difficult?" asked the second.

"No," the first replied. "It's just that they all start with the same thing: 'Take a clean dish...'"

Received from Andrew Campbell.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Coming Downstairs

Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father's annoyance. "Teddy," he called, "how many more times do I have I to tell you to come downstairs quietly? Now, go back upstairs and come down like a civilized human being."

There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room.

"That's better," said his father. "Now in the future you will always come downstairs like that."

"OK," said Teddy. "I slid down the railing."

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
To print or email this funny to others, go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://www.gcfl.net/latest.php
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KID SAYINGS
~~
Jesus' Dad's Name

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's name?"
One child answered, "Mary."
The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?"
A little kid said, "Verge."
Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?"
The kid said, "Well, you know, they are always talking about Verge n' Mary.''

***********
KIDS IN CHURCH
3-year-old Reese:
"Our Father, Who does art in
heaven, Harold is His name.
Amen."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little boy was overheard praying:
"Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it.
I'm having a real good time like I am."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the christening of his baby brother in church,
Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.
His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied,
"That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a
Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer
for several evenings at bedtime.
She would repeat after me the lines from the prayer.
Finally, she decided to go solo.
I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated
each word, right up to the end of the prayer:
"Lead us not into temptation," she prayed,
but deliver us from E-mail.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One particular four-year-old prayed,
"And forgive us our trash baskets
as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service,
"And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
One bright little girl replied,
"Because people are
sleeping."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church.
Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.
Finally, his ! big sister had had enough.
"You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."
"Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
Angie pointed to the back of the church and said,
"See those two men standing by the door?
They're hushers."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3.
The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.
Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
"If Jesus were sitting here, He would say,
'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A father was at the beach with his children
when the four-year-old son ran up to him,
grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore
where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
"Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
"He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
The boy thought a moment and then said,
"Did God throw him back down?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"

Thanks to John Chadsey
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THIRTY LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE
1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3.. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!
4.. Some people are alive only because there are laws against murder.
5.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

6.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
7.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
8.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
9.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
10.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.
11.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning
medicine.
13.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
14.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
15.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
16.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
17... Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
18.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
19.. Procrastinate Now!
20.. I Have a Degree in Liberal! Arts; D o You Want Fries With That?
21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
24..They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.
25..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
26..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three
thousand times the memory.
27..Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment
for a pig.
28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.
30.. I smile! because I don't know what else to do.

Thanks to John Chadsey
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.

*Happy Birthday*

A couple phoned a neighbor to extend birthday greetings. They dialed the number and then sang "Happy Birthday" to him. But when they finished their off-key rendition, they discovered that they had dialed the wrong number.

"Don't let it bother you," said a strange but amused voice. "You folks need all the practice you can get."

(-:][:-)

*Turtle Keeper*

Martin was a slow worker and found it difficult to hold down a job. After a visit to the job centre he was offered work at the local Zoo. When he arrived for his first day, the keeper aware of his reputation told him to take care of the tortoise section.
Later, the keeper dropped by to see how Martin was getting on and found him standing by an empty enclosure.

"Where are the tortoises?" he asked him.

"I can't believe it" said Martin "I just opened the door and then.....Whooooosh!"

(-:][:-)

*Larger Than 20*

A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order.

There was a big sign posted. "No bills larger than $20 will be accepted."

The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, "Believe me, if I HAD a bill larger than $20, I wouldn't be eating here."

(-:][:-)

*Ticket Purchase*

A couple with three children waited in line at San Francisco's Pier 41 to purchase tickets for a boat trip to Alcatraz.

Others watched with varying degrees of sympathy and irritation as the young children fidgeted, whined, and punched one another. The frazzled parents reprimanded them to no avail.

Finally they reached the ticket window.

"Five tickets, please," the father said. "Two round trip, three one way."

(-:][:-)

*Elevator Repair*

Soon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the elevators. A manager got stuck between floors and, after some door banging, finally attracted attention. His name was taken and rescue promised.

It took two hours before the elevator mechanic arrived and got the manager out. When he returned to his desk, he found this note from his efficient secretary: "The elevator people called and will be here in two hours."

-=+=-

Eye Laugh

"Birthday Disappointment"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=11

"Bike Plow"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=12

"Meat Lovers"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=13

"Driving Regret"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=14

"Rural Warning"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=15

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/margarine.html - - Margarine Is Good For You. Oops -- Never Mind. "It's hard to follow the news lately without reading some scientific red alert about an everyday food. Not long ago, for instance, The Center for Science in the Public Interest announced that pastries are bad for you. All I can say is: Exactly -- that's why we eat them..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Mayo Clinic - - http://www.mayoclinic.com/ - - Mayo Clinic Health Information's award-winning consumer Web site offers health information, and self-improvement and disease management tools. MayoClinic.com's medical experts and editorial professionals bring you access to the knowledge and experience of Mayo Clinic for all of your consumer health information needs, from cancer, diabetes and heart disease to nutrition, exercise and pregnancy.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Merck Veterinary Manual - - http://www.merckvetmanual.com/mvm/index.jsp - - The single most comprehensive electronic reference for animal care information. Includes over 12,000 indexed topics and over 1200 illustrations. Rapidly search by topic, species, specialty, disease, and keyword using advanced search.
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I Hear America Singing - - http://www.loc.gov/rr/perform/ihas/ihashome.html - - "I hear America singing, the varied carols I hear," wrote Walt Whitman in a poem celebrating the American spirit - adventuresome, strong, and inclusive. This Web site invites visitors to experience the diversity of American performing arts through the Library of Congress's unsurpassed collections of scores, sheet music, audio recordings, films, photographs, maps, and other materials.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Wired for Books - - http://wiredforbooks.org/ - - For many years, most of the best writers of the English language found their way to Don Swaim's CBS Radio studio in New York. The one-on-one interviews typically lasted 30 to 45 minutes and then had to be edited down to a two minute radio show. Wired for Books is proud to make these important oral documents publicly available for the first time in their entirety. Listen to the voices of many of the greatest writers of the twentieth century.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Today in Literature - - http://www.todayinliterature.com/ - - Today in Literature features a new original biographical story each calendar day about the great writers, books, and events in literary history.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
The Encyclopedia of Television - - http://www.museum.tv/archives/etv/index.html - - The Encyclopedia of Television includes more than 1,000 original essays from more than 250 contributors and examines specific programs and people, historic moments and trends, major policy disputes and such topics as violence, tabloid television and the quiz show scandal. It also includes histories of major television networks as well as broadcasting systems around the world and is complemented by resource materials, photos and bibliographical information.
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Windows Defender - - http://www.microsoft.com/downloads/details.aspx?FamilyID=435bfce7-da2b-4a6a-afa4-f7f14e605a0d&displaylang=en - - Windows Defender (Beta 2) is a free program that helps you stay productive by protecting your computer against pop-ups, slow performance and security threats caused by spyware and other potentially unwanted software. Related site: Microsoft Download Center. - - http://www.microsoft.com/downloads/search.aspx?displaylang=en
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------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 31, 2006
Success
Today's Safety From the Heart message is from Pam Kemp.

The Only time Success comes before Work is in the dictionary.
Take time to be successful at staying SAFE.

This takes Work- Think about what you have to do. Scan the area you are to work in for any obstructions that could pose a problem to you later. Know your job before you get started- what you have to do and how long it will take you.
Don't hurry or take short cuts - this could come back to haunt you later.
Wear your proper protective equipment.
Use the right tools for the job.
Stay Safe - Someone is waiting for you to come home tonight.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 24, 2006
BRT employee, Traci Williams
Rental Car Safety

Many of us rent cars when we travel for work or vacation and are sometimes in a hurry or anxious to get to a final destination. My typical experience with renting a car is as follows:

I get to the car lot, usually after a delayed flight, and find my car. I throw my luggage into the trunk, start the engine, adjust the AC, radio and mirrors and try to find the exit. Sometimes I know how to get to my destination and sometimes I am working with directions trying to find it. I am doing all of this while trying to get used to the car because my own car is a manual transmission; rentals are typically automatic.

With all of these distractions it is important to be aware, slow down and take the time to address any issues you may have with the car.

TIPS:

Make sure you have driving directions. Do not try to read the directions while the car is moving. Wait until the car comes to a stop or pull off the road to give yourself time to figure out your next step.

Before you leave the lot familiarize yourself with the car: be sure you know how to work the headlights, turn signals and interior lights.

Check the windshield wipers to make sure they work and that there is washer fluid; you don't want to get caught in rain or snow with bad wipers.

Adjust the seat and mirrors.

Check the seatbelts; is there one for every passenger? Are they easy to latch and unlatch?

If you like to listen to the radio as you drive, tune in a local station that meets your tastes before you hit the road.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 23, 2006
Today's Message is from Doug Thompson (a Houston Albemarle employee).
Storing and Using Household Chemicals

Here are some helpful hints.

Keep products in their original containers.
Always store containers upright, not on their side.
Make sure labels are securely fixed to containers and are readable.
Keep chemicals in a cool, dry place, out of reach of children and pets.
Never mix products together. The results could be dangerous - even deadly.
Buy only what you need and use it all up.
Share extras (such as leftover paint) with friends and neighbors.

Source - Texas Commission on Environmental Quality (TCEQ)
http://163.234.20.106/assistance/hhw/store_use.html

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 22, 2006
Dangerous Combination of Chemicals
Safety From The Heart by John McIver

Saturday morning, my wife decided to remove some scuff marks from the floor in the kitchen. While cleaning, she decided to move the stove out from the wall and clean from behind it. She tried Spic & Span and water. This did not remove the soiled area, so she tried Greased Lightning in the spray bottle. This also did not remove the soiled area. So she resorted to Clorox.
When she poured the Clorox on the area, she saw vapors rising. She immediately smelled the fumes of the fatal mixture. She covered her mouth and nose with her arm to prevent being overcome with fumes. Being in poor health, she was lucky that she could get to the back door to get fresh air.

I was asleep in the recliner and she decided she better check on me to see if I was OK. We both were OK, but this could have resulted in an emergency situation. It took several hours for her to stop coughing and for her nose and eyes to stop watering from this dangerous combination of chemicals.

Please be careful when mixing any household cleaning products.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 21, 2006
Another Fire Related Death
Today's Message is from Dick Waller (a Houston Albemarle employee).

I was thinking, what could I tell you folks about day-to-day safety that you haven't already heard. I did not want to repeat anything you have heard over and over.... that was until 2:30 a.m. this morning. I responded to a house fire in the city. There was a victim and I was the one who found her.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE check your smoke detector. Make sure it's working properly. If you don't have a smoke detector, get one. Get it installed, don't make another fireman have to find you or your loved one like I did today.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 20, 2006
Fire Fatalities in Orangeburg
Today's Safety From the Heart message was submitted by Keith Black.

Having been in the fire service for a number of years it seems like we hear more now than ever before about fire-related deaths. Fire death tragedies have been all around us so far in 2006, three deaths within a twenty-mile radius of Orangeburg last week. This is truly hard for me to understand with all the modern devices we have to prevent this from happening. Having been closely involved with one of these fatalities, which was a ten-year-old boy, makes me think that as responsible adults we are obligated to see that our families are safe.

Now how do we do that? Spend lots of money on high dollar smoke detectors and fire alarm systems. NO. Good planning with our families is the best prevention -- having regular discussions and developing escape routes for each family member. Each area of the home should have several planned escape routes. You will be surprised at how well a five or six-year-old child will remember what to do in an emergency, but it is up to us to see that they are taught how to do them.

The ten-year-old I spoke of earlier would not have been a statistic if the family would have had planned escape routes. How do I know this? I found him sitting up in his bed less than two feet away from his bedroom window.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

March 17, 2006
Hesitate When the Light Turns Green
Prepared by Joe Sanders, BRT employee

Traffic around Baton Rouge has been and continues to be quite heavy. The simple trips now take longer than they did a year ago. Many of us have not changed our habits and do not allow more time to get from point to point. People seem anxious and more willing to take chances as they drive. I have noticed an even greater number of drivers since the Katrina population boom that speed up as traffic signals turn to yellow then red, rather than sit through another cycle. This seems particularly true in the parish outside of the city limit.

When the signal turns green, please hesitate long enough to be sure the intersection is clear. If someone runs the light and hits you, even though you may be legally in the right, you can still be injured.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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Hands!

A basketball in my hands is worth about $19.
A basketball in Michael Jordan's hands is worth about $33 million.
It depends whose hands it's in.

A baseball in my hands is worth about $6.
A baseball in Mark McGuire's hands is worth $19 million.
It depends on whose hands it's in.

A tennis racket is useless in my hands.
A tennis racket in Venus Williams' hands is a championship winning.
It depends whose hands it's in.

A rod in my hands will keep away a wild animal.
A rod in Moses' hands will part the mighty sea.

It depends whose hands it's in.

A sling shot in my hands is a kid's toy
A sling shot in David's hand is a mighty weapon.
It depends whose hands it's in.

Two fish and 5 loaves of bread in my hands is a couple of fish sandwiches.
Two fish and 5 loaves of bread in God's hands will feed thousands.
It depends whose hands it's in.

Nails in my hands might produce a birdhouse.
Nails in Jesus Christ's hands will
produce salvation for the entire world.
It depends whose hands it's in.

As you see now it depends whose hands it's in.
So put your concerns, your worries, your fears, your hopes, your dreams, your families and your relationships in God's hands because...
It depends whose hands it's in.

Thanks to John Chadsey
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Be slow to judge

I was shocked, confused, bewildered as I entered Heaven's door, Not by the beauty of it all, nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven who made me sputter and gasp-- the thieves, the liars, the sinners, the alcoholics, the trash...

There stood the kid from seventh grade who swiped my lunch money twice.

Next to him was my old neighbor who never said anything nice.
Herb, whom I always thought was rotting away in hell, was sitting pretty on cloud nine, looking incredibly well.

I nudged Jesus, "What's the deal? I would love to hear Your take.
How'd all these sinners get up here? God must've made a mistake.

"And why's everyone so quiet, so somber? Give me a clue."

"Hush, child," said He, "They're all in shock. No one thought they'd be seeing you!"

Thanks to David Lamb
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Recall request

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units, code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Subsequential Internal Non-morality," or commonly known as S. I. N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some symptoms:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish and/or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service, free of charge, to correct this "SIN" defect.

The Repair Technician, JESUS , has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs.

There is no additional fee required.

The number to call for repair in all areas is: please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, JESUS , into the heart component.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, JESUS will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

Please see the operating manual: the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human-being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list, and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.
For free emergency service, call on JESUS.

DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

Thank you for your attention!

GOD

P. S. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice.

Thanks to David Lamb
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A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He! And the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"

"This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.

"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.

"Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up."

The man gestured, and the gate began to open.
"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."
The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

"Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?" Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in."

"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog

"There should be a bowl by the pump."
They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog. When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree. "What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.
"This is Heaven," he answered.
"Well, that's confusing," the ! Traveler said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too." "Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."

"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"

No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind."

Thanks to David Lamb
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Just up the road from my home is a field, with two horses in it. From a distance, each looks like every other horse. But if you stop your car or are walking by, you will notice something quite amazing.

Looking into the eyes of one horse will disclose that he is blind. His owner has chosen not to have him put down, but has made a good home for him. This alone is amazing.

If nearby and listening, you will hear the sound of a bell. Looking around for the source of the sound, you will see that it comes from the smaller horse in the field. Attached to her bridle is a small bell. It lets her blind friend know where she is, so he can follow her.

As you stand and watch these two friends, you'll see how she is always checking on him, and that he will listen for her bell and then slowly walk to where she is, trusting that she will not lead him astray. When she returns to the shelter of the barn each evening, she stops occasionally and looks back, making sure her friend isn't too far behind to hear the bell.

Like the owners of these two horses, God does not throw us away just because we are not perfect or because we have problems or challenges. He watches over us and even brings others into our lives to help us when we are in need.

Sometimes we are the blind horse being guided by the little ringing bell of those who God places in our lives. Other times we are the guide horse, helping others see.

Good friends are like this. . . . .You don't always see them, but you know they are always there. Please listen for my bell and I'll try to remember to listen for yours.

Thanks to Trina Montgomery
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AWESOME

This is almost overwhelming when you think about it.

Moses and the people were in the desert, but what was he going to do with them?

They had to be fed, and feeding 2 or 3 million people requires a lot of food.

According to the Quartermaster General in the Army, it is reported that Moses would have to have had 1500 tons of food each day. Do you know that to bring that much food each day, two freight trains, each at least a mile long, would be required!

Besides you must remember, they were out in the desert, so they would have to have firewood to use in cooking the food. This would take 4000 tons of wood and a few more freight trains, each a mile long, just for one day.

And just think, they were forty years in transit.

And Oh yes! They would have to have water. If they only had enough to drink and wash a few dishes, it would take 11,000,000 gallons each day and a freight train with tank cars, 1800 miles long, just to bring water!

And then another thing!

They had to get across the Red Sea at night. Now, if they went on a narrow path, double file, the line would be 800 miles long and would require35 days and nights to get through. So there had to be a space in the Red Sea, 3 miles wide so that they could walk 5000 abreast to get over in one night.

But then, there is another problem...............each time they camped at the end of the day, a campground two-thirds the size of the state of Rhode Island was required, or a total of 750 square miles long....... think of it! This much space for camping.

Do you think Moses figured all this out before he left Egypt? I think not!
You see, Moses believed in God. God took care of these things for him.

Now do you think God has any problem taking care of all your needs?

I asked the Lord to bless you As I prayed for you today. To guide you and protect you as you go along your way.... His love is always with you, His promises are true, And when we give Him all our cares, You know He will see us through.

Our God is an Awesome God!!

So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best, just remember I'm praying and God will do the rest.

Thanks to John Chadsey
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Psalm 23

This is an eye opener; some probably never thought nor looked at Psalm 23
In this way, even though they say it over and over again.

The Lord is my Shepherd
That's Relationship!

I shall not want
That's Supply!

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures
That's Rest!

He leadeth me beside the still waters
That's Refreshment!

He restoreth my soul
That's Healing!

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness
That's Guidance!

For His name sake
That's Purpose!

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
That's Testing!

I will fear no evil
That's Protection!

For Thou art with me
That's Faithfulness!

Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me
That's Discipline!

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies
That's Hope!

Thou annointest my head with oil
That's Consecration!

My cup runneth over
That's Abundance!

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life
That's Blessing!

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
That's Security!

Forever
That's Eternity!

What is most valuable, is not WHAT we have in our lives, but WHO we have in
Our lives!

Thanks to John Chadsey
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Let a man regard us in this manner, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. In this case, moreover, it is required of stewards that one be found trustworthy. But to me it is a very small thing that I may be examined by you, or by any human court; in fact, I do not even examine myself. For I am conscious of nothing against myself, yet I am not by this acquitted; but the one who examines me is the Lord. Therefore do not go on passing judgment before the time, but wait until the Lord comes who will both bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men’s hearts; and then each man’s praise will come to him from God. - 1 Co 4:1-5 (NASB95)

“Let’s clear the air,” John said. “You condemn me because you think I crossed you in this business deal.”

“That’s right,” Bill agreed. “I believe you were dishonest from the day we first met. You chose me because you thought I would be easy to double-cross.”

“Just for the record, I think you are a marvelous person, however misguided you are. You have no evidence – no proof. As a matter of fact, you are totally wrong. You have misjudged me from the beginning.” John said in his defense. “Here is all the proof you need,” he continued as he produced a packet of pictures and documentation proving that the secretary planned and executed the whole thing and framed John for the crime.

Pardon the bit of pulp fiction, but it goes to set the scene for this chapter in 1 Corinthians. Paul begins by clearing the air. “We are servants of Christ. Look at us in that light.” He lays no claim to greatness. He does not desire recognition. He and Apollos are nothing more nor nothing less. He continues, “As servants, stewards of the things entrusted to us, we have only one responsibility: to be found worthy of trust.” The implication is that this cannot be denied. Both men are trustworthy in their ministry.

The air is still laden with the smoke of dissention. “There is no need whatsoever for you to judge us. What’s more, I don’t even judge myself.” Casting off the haze like a man shedding a heavy coat, Paul simply states that he has nothing to hide. The air is much clearer now. The uncertainties have been removed from the situation. Everyone can see clearly now. Yet, Paul continues.

“Yes, I will be judged in due season. It will not be in a court in which you are empaneled as jury. It will not be in the court of my own mind. The day will come when the Lord with shine the light of truth on me … and on you … and all will be revealed for what it is. In that day, the darkest secrets of the heart will be revealed. In that day, the praise will not come from people, but from the Father of us all. He will be my judge. He will be your judge. Let’s simply wait for that day to arrive.” The time bomb has been defused. The air has been cleared. The table is set for the next round of discussions concerning the items that most distresses the Apostle.

As for you and me, the greatest problem we all have is this: we judge ourselves too harshly! We know our sins … and cannot believe that God can possibly love us with those sins soiling His child. Tell me something. If a mother finds her three year old child sitting in a mud puddle making mud pies dressed in his best Sunday outfit, does she hate him? Does she disown him? Does she cast him into the street as an unfit child? The answer is obvious. She still loves him. She may discipline him as she bathes him for the second time in an hour, but she still loves him. She may be angry and upset, but he is still her beloved son. And so it is with you and me. God still loves us. We are still His children. So, lighten up! Let up on yourself. Give your self a break and forgive yourself of past sins. God has.

-=+=-

Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you thinks that he is wise in this age, he must become foolish, so that he may become wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness before God. For it is written, “He is the one who catches the wise in their craftiness”; and again, “The Lord knows the reasonings of the wise, that they are useless.” So then let no one boast in men. For all things belong to you, whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or things present or things to come; all things belong to you, and you belong to Christ; and Christ belongs to God. - 1 Co 3:18-23 (NASB95)

Paul has said a lot of things about the superiority of God’s wisdom. Today’s verses provide a good summary to date. 1) The guy who thinks he is wise by the world’s standard is really foolish. The antidote is for him to become foolish so that he may be wise. 2) God is so wise that he can catch the “wisest of men” in their stupidity. Human wisdom can never outsmart God. 3) Let no one boast in human wisdom … or men. Remember, this is directed towards Christians. It is likely that the “no one” of this verse refers to any Christian. The portion then may be read: “let no Christian boast in men or their wisdom.” 4) All things belong to the believer!

Whoa! Did you see that last statement? That sounds good, doesn’t it. I own all things! Keep reading. “… and you belong to Christ; and Christ belongs to God.” Here is the gist of the story. Sure, I own everything … except myself. Jesus owns me. And Jesus us owned by God. Now, how valuable is my ownership?

Let’s assume for a moment that I own a slave. From time to time I give him a few bucks because he does such good work. He saves his bucks and buys a quality stereo because he loves good music. Over time he assembles quite a good CD collection. Does the slave own the stereo and CDs? Certainly. Do I own him? Absolutely. If I own him and he owns the stereo, who really controls the stereo? That’s right; the ultimate owner of everything is me. My slave’s use of the equipment is totally at my mercy … and my control. If I am a good master, then I bless him with extra cash to buy more music … and may even suggest a few selections. If I am a bad master, greed takes over; I claim the stereo and CDs and sell the slave … because he wasted too much time listening to music!

The point is this: my ownership of everything is totally at the mercy of my Master. He tells me what I can use and how I can use it. Fortunately, my master is a merciful master and gives me lots of latitude … and give good guidance as to the best use of those properties. So, ultimately everything I own belongs to Jesus … and I have the responsibility to use those possessions to the glory of my Master, Jesus Christ … and He looks to His owner, the Father, to make sure the possessions are used to their best advantage.

I don’t know what you think of all this, but for me it is refreshing and a relief! I don’t have to worry about my money any more. I simply ask my Master what to do with it, and he tells me how to use it. I trust Him to do what is right because He is the absolute source of wisdom … and that wisdom is nearly always contrary to what the world tells me to do.

-=+=-

Harley

c. 2006 Harley E. Hudson

If you received Verse of the Day as a forward and you wish to have your own subscription, simply send an e-mail to hhudson719@sbcglobal.net and request a free subscription.
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 11, Number 47 --- 28 March 2006

+-----------------------------------------+

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Air Travel / System Restore

Planning to travel by air? Today's TOURBUS will make you a smarter traveler and save you time & money. Also in this issue, how to go back in time to fix your PC, sharing your printer, and the best online game sites. Read on!
+-----------------------------------------+

-----------------------------------
Airports, Airlines, And Airplanes
-----------------------------------

Leavin' on a jet plane? Learn how to make air travel reservations, find airports, get airline information, and view real-time flight tracking data. Read on for insider tips on travel planning and reservations, find links to official airport websites in over 200 countries, see how likely you are to encounter a delay with your airline, and exactly how long it will take get through security.

http://askbobrankin.com/air_travel.html

---------------------------------
Time Travel with System Restore
---------------------------------

A reader recently wrote and asked the following question:

Help! I downloaded a program that was supposed to remove spyware from my computer. But now I'm getting even MORE popups and my system freezes at random intervals. I tried to uninstall it but can't find a way to get rid of this thing. What do you recommend?

I'm sure this reader is not the only one wishing for a big red UNDO button on his PC. Unless you are very careful, you can download a new program or software update, then find that it makes your system unstable. Wouldn't it be nice if you could go back to a point in time when your computer was working? With System Restore, you can.

http://askbobrankin.com/system_restore.html

-------------------
Sharing a Printer
-------------------

So you have two or more computers, but only one printer. Instead of buying additional printers, why not share the printer so all your computers can print to it? You don't have to be a computer guru to make it happen. Whether your computers are already networked or not, this illustrated guide to printer sharing will show you how...

http://askbobrankin.com/sharing_a_printer.html

--------------
Online Games
--------------

Looking for some challenging word play, or a little mindless diversion? Here are a bunch of websites where you can play online web-based games right in your web browser. Most of them are programmed with Shockwave, Flash or Java so there's no need to download anything.

http://askbobrankin.com/online_games.html

+-----------------------------------------+

That's all for now, see you next time! -- Bob Rankin

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==

The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238 Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
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Activities and Events of Interest
~~~
Investing for Retirement Class at SAU - Tuesday, April 4
Dr. David Ashby, the Peoples Bank Professor of Economics at SAU, will advise people about investing for retirement. This course will cover the basics of retirement planning from calculating how much is needed, to what type of accounts to use, to where to invest the money. Participants will learn how to save income taxes while saving for retirement. The class will also look at how mutual funds can simplify the whole process.
This class will be offered from 6 to 8 p.m. on Tuesday, April 4, in Business 205.
There is no charge to participate in this course.
~~~
Albemarle Steak and Bingo Supper - April 22, 2006
~~~
The Barksdale AFB Holiday in Dixie "Defenders Of Liberty" Big Air show Saturday and Sunday, May 13-14, gates open at 9:00 am, Show starts at 10:00 am
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Staff Sgt. Brock A. Beery, 30, of White House, Tenn., died in Habbaniyah, Iraq on March 23, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his LMTV followed by enemy small arms fire during combat operations. Beery was assigned to the Army National Guard's 2nd Battalion, 123rd Armor Regiment, Bowling Green, Ky.

02. Sgt 1st Class Randy D. McCaulley, 44, Indiana, Pa., died in Habbaniyah, Iraq on March 23, when his dismounted patrol came under enemy small arms fire during combat operations. McCaulley was assigned to the Army National Guard's 1st Battalion, 110th Infantry, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 28th Infantry Division, Indiana, Pa.

03. Staff Sgt. Christopher L. Robinson, 36, Brandon, Miss., died in Sangain District, Afghanistan on March 25, when his HMMWV came under enemy small arms fire during combat operations. Robinson was assigned to the Army National Guard's 2nd Battalion, 20th Special Forces Group, Jackson, Miss.

04. Spc. Frederick A. Carlson, 25, Bethlehem, Pa., died in Taqqadum, Iraq on March 25, from a non-combat related cause. Carlson was assigned to the Army National Guard's 228th Forward Support Battalion, 2nd Battalion, 28th Infantry Division, Bethlehem, Pa.

05. Sgt. Michael D. Rowe, 23, New Port Richey, Fla., died in Rutbah, Iraq on March 28, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his HMMWV during combat operations. Rowe was assigned to the 46th Engineer Battalion, Warrior Brigade, Fort Polk, La.

06. Sgt. 1st Class John T. Stone, 52, of Norwich, Vt., died March 28 in Lashkagar, Afghanistan as a result of enemy mortar and small arms attacks during combat operations. Stone was assigned to the Army National Guard's 15th Civil Support Team, South Burlington, Vt.

07. Tech. Sgt. Walter M. Moss Jr., 37, of Houston, Texas, was killed in the explosion of an improvised explosive device while conducting safing operations in the vicinity of Baghdad, Iraq on March 29.
Moss was assigned to the 366th Civil Engineer Squadron, Mountain Home AFB, Idaho.

08. Pfc. Sean D. Tharp, 21, of Orlando, Fla., died in Baghdad, Iraq on March 28, when his element came under enemy small arms fire while conducting dismounted patrol operations. Tharp was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 22nd Infantry, 1st Brigade, 4th Infantry Division, Fort Hood, Texas.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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It’s never too early to start making my Anniversary Present list. (Well, I did get a new medicine bag for my birthday.)
Rechargeable Batteries for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (9.6 volts, 600 mAh battery, 2 each (for our two radios)), Yaesu FT-50 (it takes a FNB-83 7.2V1400mAh battery), Yaesu, VX-1 (it takes a FNB-52LI 3.6V 700mAh Lithium-Ion battery).
New “Rubber Ducky” antennas for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (two radios)
Anything from Larry Norman
Back Scratcher
Basic tools of any kind
Batteries, 9 volt
Batteries, AAA
Blankets or Quilts
Book, “The Good Life: Seeking Purpose, Meaning, and Truth in Your Life” by Charles Colson
“Boot” Horn
Chair, office $49 from SAMS (5 of them)
Cheese Grater
Cordless Drill
Cordless Screwdriver
A DeLorme Earthmate GPS LT-20 device
A copy of DeLorme Street Atlas USA 2006 Plus
A copy of DeLorme Topo USA 5.0
Digital Video Recorder (Pioneer DVR-533H-S $333 at Beach Camera)
Eyeglasses, “Computer type” to use at church (and some new ones to use at home and at work.)
Floor Mats (for the truck)
A new “Gitter”
Handkerchiefs
Hasselblad H2D-39 Digital Professional Camera
Hat (warm, for bald guys winter wear.)
Magnifying Glass.
New Showerhead
Non skid toilet rug
Refrigerator Thermometer
Small, lightweight “head light” so I can see small things on the desk or work bench.
Some Warmup Suits to wear around the house after we get that first gas bill.
Trackball for the home computer
VHS - DVD Recorder (Lite-On LVC-9006 $219 @ Buy.com)
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Scheduled Activities
~~~
Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
~~~
Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
~~~
"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
~~~
MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
~~~
MCC - Early Morning Prayer - Monday - Friday, From 6:30 am to 8:00 am
~~~
MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
~~~
MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
~~~
MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
~~~
MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
~~~
MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
~~~
MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
~~~
MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
~~~
Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
~~~
TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Heb 6:18-20 Jer 26:8-9 Mark 8:34-37 2 Chr 7:1-3 Luke 5:4-6 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E-mail at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. For the "Blog" version just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com/ to see the latest issue.
Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat".
If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. Of course "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com to see the latest issue (usually updated sometime Friday evening or Saturday morning. We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>

2006-03-25T11:43:00.000-08:00

Terry discovers "The Butterfly"

Atilia examines their preparations for lifting the victim.

Greg supervises installation of the lifting straps.

2006-03-25T11:40:00.000-08:00

John and Bubba ponder the mysteries of cord.

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Bonus

2006-03-24T19:05:00.000-08:00

Volume 8, Issue 12 Friday, March 24, 2006

Hello ALL,

Thanks to my church family for praying for me Sunday. I’d been suffering with a sore toe and it was a “bear” Sunday. Monday, the pain was almost all gone but Dr. Murphy still told me to lay off work and put me on Antibiotics for the infection. The good part was that I got whirlpool treatments at the hospital every morning. I could get used to that. Then Tuesday, my blood test showed my counts had dipped again. Which was not as bad as it could have been. So far it hasn’t kicked off the severe back pain like previous dips in my hemoglobin. And, since I was already cutting back on work, I’ve had time to nap more.
As of this writing, the toe is improving and I’m hoping a fresh “Lot” of EPO that’s coming in next week will boost the blood counts.
~~~~~
A friend told me that she and her husband purchased their first “King Size” bed last week. “So what?” You say.
The punch line is WHY they finally bought a “King Size” bed. They invested in a Bed upgrade because there wasn’t enough room for them and their two black labs.
Isn’t there a Jeff Foxworthy quote for this? Something like . . . “You may be a redneck if you buy a bigger bed to make room for the dogs.”
~~~~~
Our friend Terry Stockdale sent us this information about his sister-in-law, Jean Stockdale’s ministry - Standing Near the Cross "Without a doubt, the driving passion of my life is to share the radical transforming power of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ."

With these words, Jean Stockdale begins her web site Jean Stockdale - Standing Near the Cross. - - http://www.thenextwindow.com/exit.php?url_id=1276&entry_id=222

Practical, humorous, and insightful are just a few words that describe the teaching ministry of Jean Stockdale. God has blessed her with a unique ability to teach profound Biblical principles while using practical illustrations, personal life message, and a sprinkling of sanctified humor.

Jean's Speaking Ministry [http://www.thenextwindow.com/exit.php?url_id=1274&entry_id=222] has taken her across the United States to speak at churches and Christian women's rallies. Through 16 years of her MOMS Ministry, she has helped countless young mothers as they struggled with today's hectic world and including their loves of the Lord, their husbands, and their families.

Visit her web site Jean Stockdale - Standing Near the Cross [http://www.thenextwindow.com/exit.php?url_id=1276&entry_id=222] to read more about Jean, her Speaking Ministry and her MOMS Ministry. Jean lives near Memphis Tennessee and is available for speaking engagements across the country through The Mitchell Group. - - http://www.thenextwindow.com/exit.php?url_id=1277&entry_id=222

http://www.thenextwindow.com/
~~~~~
I attended the County Wide “AWIN” radio training session Thursday night. These digital 800 MHZ radios have been installed in all fire, law and emergency response agencies. They give us CRYSTAL CLEAR communications throughout the county and the state. I’ve been listening to the Arkansas Department of Emergency Management and the traffic from all over the state is static free.
Now if we just had enough money to outfit EVERY emergency vehicle and responder in the county. Maybe we could go up to Hope and sell a few trailers for the funds?
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this weeks “Bleat” include shots of our Albemarle Rescue Team training on “Rope Rescue.”
~~~~~
We’ve been watching the movies of Preston Sturges, writer and director. Our favorites (so far) are “Palm Beach Story” and “Lady Eve.”
~~~~~
Please pray for David Kirkpatrick’s wife, Sandy Kirkpatrick, who is in Baptist Hospital in Little Rock.
~~~~~
Three Christian Activists Rescued in Iraq
By BASSEM MROUE
Associated Press Writer

BAGHDAD, Iraq

A coalition force on Thursday freed three Christian peace activists taken hostage in Iraq, ending a four-month hostage drama in which an American among the group was shot to death and dumped on a Baghdad street.
The Iraqi Interior Ministry said the captives were rescued in a joint U.S.-British operation in rural area northwest of Baghdad, between the towns of Mishahda, 20 miles north of Baghdad, and the western suburb of Abu Ghraib, 12 miles from downtown.
British officials in Baghdad said those freed were Canadians James Loney, 41, and Harmeet Singh Sooden, 32; and Briton Norman Kember, 74. The men _ members of the Chicago-based Christian Peacemaker Teams _ were kidnapped on Nov. 26 along with their American colleague, Tom Fox, 54, whose body was found earlier this month.
Speaking in Toronto, Doug Pritchard, co-director of the group, said no shots were fired during the operation and that the kidnappers were not present when the U.S.-British force freed the hostages. U.S. and British military officials did not provide details of the operation.
In London, British Foreign Secretary Jack Straw said Kember was in "reasonable condition" in Baghdad's heavily fortified Green Zone. The two Canadians required hospital treatment, he said, but gave no further details.
Straw also gave few details of the operation, saying only that it followed "weeks and weeks" of planning.
British Prime Minister Tony Blair's office said he was "delighted by the news" of the trio's release. "He is particularly pleased for those released and their families. He congratulates everyone involved in the operation to rescue the hostages," Downing Street said in a statement.
Loney's brother, Ed Loney, told CBC television that his mother had spoken with Loney on the phone and he sounded "fantastic."
"He's alert and he was asking how we were doing and said he was sorry for the whole situation," Ed Loney said. "My mom said, 'Don't worry about it _ just get home and we'll talk about all that stuff when you get here.'"
The kidnapped men were shown as prisoners in several videos, the most recent a silent clip dated Feb. 28 in which Loney, Kember and Sooden appeared without Fox. Fox's body was found March 10 near a west Baghdad railway line with gunshot wounds to his head and chest.
The previously unknown Swords of Righteousness Brigades claimed responsibility for the kidnappings.
In a statement, the Christian Peacemaker Teams said the activists went to Iraq "motivated by a passion for justice and peace." The group called for coalition forces to remove their troops from the country.
"We believe that the illegal occupation of Iraq by Multinational Forces is the root cause of the insecurity which led to this kidnapping and so much pain and suffering in Iraq," the statement said.
Other Americans taken hostage in Iraq and killed in addition to Fox were Ronald Schulz, 40, an industrial electrician from Anchorage, Alaska; Jack Hensley, 48, a civil engineer from Marietta, Ga.; Eugene "Jack" Armstrong, 52, formerly of Hillsdale, Mich.; and Nicholas Berg, 26, a businessman from West Chester, Pa.
Still missing is Jill Carroll, a freelance writer for The Christian Science Monitor who was kidnapped Jan. 7 in Baghdad. She has appeared in three videotapes delivered by her kidnappers to Arab satellite television stations.

The last hostage to be freed in a military operation was Douglas Wood, an Australian rescued in west Baghdad by U.S. and Iraqi forces on June 15 after 47 days in captivity.
On the Net: - - Christian Peacemaker Teams: http://www.cpt.org/
~~~~~
This week, Michael Yon commented on Iraq and it’s violence.
~
Anyone Smell Smoke?

The Iraqi Civil War
Nobody knows what the future will bring for Iraq. In my opinion, it’s already in a civil war, though many people seem afraid to say it. Actually, the reluctance is more likely ordinal in nature–-no one wants to be the first to say what many know to be true. Many now-stable democracies have suffered civil wars.
Democracy, despite its inherent nobility, is seldom easy or pretty. At its best, democracy is a reflection of the “people,” and we all know what “they” are like.
- (Mission Impossible, Mission Accomplished 23 February 2005)
I wrote those words more than one year ago. Hatred that has been pressurized is a potent and malevolent fuel. Although I’d been in Iraq for just two months, I’d seen enough to know it was too late to talk about hiding the matches—a fire had broken out. The tangled briars of tribal enmities had overgrown, dense from decades of Saddam Hussein’s genocidal death squads. Wrenching that dictatorship changed the political landscape and in the process pumped fresh air into a smoldering fire.
Throughout 2005, I said in writing, on the radio and television that Iraq is in a state of Civil War. It had been in that state for decades. I’d point to all the kindling heaped around the country and point to the smoke on the horizon, but most people politely dismissed the warnings. Now the fire is bigger. Listen. Listen! Iraq is in a state of Civil War. Much bigger than it was a year ago, and next year it will be bigger still, if we do not recognize that there is a FIRE!
There is no reason why Iraq and its proud people cannot make it. There is nothing written in any holy scripture – so far as I know – that says Iraq cannot make it. Iraq can, but will it? Not if we don’t stop quibbling over definitions and just come to grips that the fire is growing. This is not a fire we can afford to leave to natural forces. Not in that tinderbox we call the Middle East.

http://michaelyon-online.com/
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
Mark Twain once said; “There are lies, danged lies, and statistics.” I was reminded of that by the news story about the number of pieces of luggage lost by the airlines each year. An estimated 30 million bags were temporarily lost by airlines in 2005, and 200,000 of those bags (many of which end up at Unclaimed Baggage Center of Scottsboro, AL - - http://www.unclaimedbaggage.com/) were never reunited with their owners, according to an industry report released Monday.

The “good” news is that the 30 million misdirected bags comprised only 1 percent of the 3 billion bags processed last year by airports.

Only statistics could make 30 million missing bags insignificant (“only 1 percent”). I wonder what the statistics are for lost travelers?
~~~~~
The Barksdale AFB Holiday in Dixie "Defenders Of Liberty" Big Air show Saturday and Sunday, May 13-14, gates open at 9:00 am, Show starts at 10:00 am

9:00 AM - 11:00 AM
Radio Controlled aircraft
Dave Leedom and Gary Boucher
Luke Lambard demo

9:30 AM (Saturday Only)
United States Marine Reserves
Iraqi Freedom Formation and Medals Ceremony

11:00 AM - 12:00 PM
B-52 Wall of Fire
MiG-17 demo
B-1 fly-by
Jimmy Franklin & Shockwave tease

12:00 PM - 1:00 PM
National Anthem and Airshow Welcome
Black Dagger Parachute Team
Tora! Tora! Tora!

1:00 PM - 2:00PM
Greg Poe demo
Jimmy Franklin Jet-Powered Waco

2:00 PM - 3:00 PM
A-10 demo team
B-17
B-24
B-25
P-51
Heritage flight (A-10, P-51)
Ed Hamill demo
Shockwave

3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
USN Blue Angels

*Performers and times are subject to change
http://www.barksdaleairshow.org/schedule.php
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com. Older issues can be found at bugsbleat.blogspot.com, bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com, and bugsbleat4q.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.50
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - We’re sharing recipes from Shannon Voigt’s new Taylor Recipe Book
Howard’s Chili - Novie Gordon (Mrs. Gordon was one of my elementary school teacher at Taylor.)

Ingredients:
5 lb ground beef
4-5 cloves garlic
3 large onions
¾ cup chili powder
1 Tbsp. salt
1 ½ tsp. white pepper
1 Tbsp. cumin seed
1 ½ Tbsp. cumin powder
1 can tomato paste
3 cups water
1 tsp. black pepper
1 tsp. sugar

Method:
Grind garlic and onions in food processor until a pulp. Cook in large kettle with ground beef until done, stirring constantly. Add chili powder. Add salt. Add all other ingredients except sugar. Cook slowly for several hours. Stir occasionally and check if extra seasoning is needed. (Howard checks his chili several times for additional seasoning, if needed.) Add sugar just before removing from heat. For better taste, let stand before serving.
~~~~~
BreakPoint With Chuck Colson

Overcoming the Clash of Civilizations
The Bible and Other Faiths
March 24, 2006
Note: This commentary was delivered by Prison Fellowship President Mark Earley.

The clash of civilizations is a term most of us are familiar with. But it’s more than just a catchphrase or a book title. It’s a grim reality that we live with every day, as we deal with acts of religiously inspired terrorism.

In such a difficult and often frightening situation, how should we live? How do we relate to the people of different backgrounds and beliefs that we see every day? And going beyond that, how do we talk to them to about Christ? In these tense times, we’re in need of a thorough and practical answer.

Ida Glaser helps us to meet that need in her new book, The Bible and Other Faiths: Christian Responsibility in a World of Religions. Glaser is uniquely qualified for the task. She is the daughter of a Christian mother and a Jewish father who later converted to Christianity. She has spent her entire career working with international students and studying interfaith relations.

In her book, as her subtitle suggests, she focuses on the responsibilities that Christians have in dealing with their neighbors of other faiths. Glaser acknowledges the difficulties and problems in dealing with people of other beliefs. But she calls us to account for our own behavior.

Tragically, Glaser has seen situations where Christians have killed in the name of religion—in Nigeria, for instance, when Christian youths killed Muslims who tried to pass their roadblocks. More commonly, Glaser has known Christians whose skewed theology has led them to look down on people of other faiths and to think that some people groups are inherently better than others.

Glaser takes us where we need to go—back to the Bible—to emphasize that God’s care and provision has always been for all people, as demonstrated by Christ’s death on the cross. Looking at current events in the Middle East, for example, Glaser says, “Whatever their interpretation of the current state of Israel, Christians have no basis either to treat the Jews as people whom God hates or to treat Israel’s enemies as people whom God hates. Any theology which leads either to hatred of Jews or to hatred of Muslims must be wrong in itself or be wrongly applied.”

This truth has radical implications about how you and I as Christians should live our lives and deeply convicts many of us. Both Chuck and I take seriously the words of God in Genesis 12:2, where He blesses Israel and says, “I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse.” Therefore, we have an especially strong attachment to Israel and the Jewish cause. Chuck has also spoken many times of our support for Israel, because it is a beacon for democracy in that troubled region. But that’s no excuse for hating Arabs and Muslims. The fact is that we have a Savior who came for all people.

This is the very point our founding fathers understood when they wrote in the Declaration of Independence, “that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights.”

Glaser’s book, The Bible and Other Faiths, can be a helpful guide for Christians to look beyond the barriers that separate us from our neighbors. Its central message is one that we need to take to heart: We can only share the Gospel of Christ and the hope of Christ with other people, however great our differences, when they know that we care about them and respect them as human beings made in the image of God.
--------------------------------------------
For further reading and information:
Today’s BreakPoint offer: Subscribe today to BreakPoint WorldView magazine. Call 1-877-322-5527.
Ida Glaser, The Bible and Other Faiths: Christian Responsibility in a World of Religions (InterVarsity, 2005).
BreakPoint Commentary No. 030218, “Covenant and Conflict: Israel’s Place in the World Today.”
“Christian Relief Opens Door of Faith to Pakistani Muslims,” Christian Post, 24 December 2005.
Luanne Austin, “The Opportunity to Love Our Enemies,” BreakPoint Online, 2001.
The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004 Prison Fellowship.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
amalgam: an alloy of mercury with other metals; also, a mixture.
dudgeon: a state or fit of intense indignation.
paragon: a model of excellence or perfection.
aubade: a song greeting the dawn.
succor: aid; help; also, to help or relieve.
paterfamilias: the male head of a household; the father of a family.
stolid: unexcitable; unemotional.
from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"Interpretation is the revenge of the intellect upon art. Even more. It is the revenge of the intellect upon the world. To interpret is to impoverish, to deplete the world - in order to set up a shadow world of 'meanings.' " - Susan Sontag

"I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy." - Rabindranath Tagore

"Spring in the world! And all things are made new!" - Richard Hovey

"To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often." - Sir Winston Churchill

"Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from." - Elisabeth KuBler-Ross

"I look upon every day to be lost, in which I do not make a new acquaintance." - Samuel Johnson

"Nobody holds a good opinion of a man who has a low opinion of himself." - Anthony Trollope
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

U.S. Secretary of State Rice, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper Phone Afghan President Karzai Concerning Christian Convert
News staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 24, 2006)
Some reports say Abdul Rahman may be released soon. - - http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2291

Israel and Its Christian Support Base Linked by New Christian Edition of The Jerusalem Post
Michael Ireland / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 22, 2006)
According to a report in ANS, The Jerusalem Post is now partnering with the International Christian Embassy Jerusalem on the new edition. - - http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2283

"Stunning" Gallup Poll Reveals Christianity Growing in Japan
Michael Ireland/Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 21, 2006)
"In my 50 years of polling, there has been no study that I would consider as important as this one . . ." - - http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2278

Prayer Alert: Cyclone Larry Wreaks Havoc on Coast of Australia -- Leaves Thousands Homeless
Meraiah Foley / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 20, 2006)
"The damage to dwellings is very extensive. Thank heavens it does not appear as though there have been any very serious injuries." - - http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2275
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GCF: Bonus

Emailed to me from another humor list (You Make Me Laugh) -Tom To subscribe to You Make Me Laugh, send a blank email to: SUBSCRIBE-laugh@lists.crosswalk.com

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ Unsubscribe info for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
------------------------------------------
(Here's hoping there is no one like this at your workplace.)

Faced with hard times, the company offered a bonus of one thousand dollars to any employee who could come up with a way of saving money.

The bonus went to a young woman in accounting who suggested limiting future bonuses to ten dollars.
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Young Patients

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Howard) -Tom

------------------------------------------

A pediatrician in town always plays a game with some of his young patients to put them at ease and test their knowledge of body parts.

One day, while pointing to a Little boy's ear, the doctor asked him, "Is this your nose?"

Immediately the little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mom, I think we'd better find a new doctor!"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Considerate?

Emailed to me from another humor list (Marty's Joke of the Day) -Tom To subscribe to Marty's Joke of the Day, send a blank email to: martysjotd-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
------------------------------------------

As I was on the way home from a long and stressful day at the office, the car phone rang. It was my husband. "Will you be joining me in the whirlpool bath tonight?" he asked. "What a lovely way to spend an evening," I thought. I was about to tell him how considerate he was when he continued, "Because if you're not, I need to start adding more water to the tub."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Don't Ignore the Kids

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Howard) -Tom
------------------------------------------

The 12-year-old boy stood patiently beside the clock counter while the store clerk waited on all of the adult customers first. Finally he got around to the youngster, who made his purchase and hurried out to the curb, where his father was impatiently waiting in his car.

"What took you so long, son?" he asked.

"The man waited on everybody in the store before me," the boy replied. "But I got even."

"How?"

"I wound and set all the alarm clocks while I was waiting," the youngster explained happily. "It's going to be fun at eight o'clock."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Hopeless Pupil

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Howard) -Tom
------------------------------------------

"It's no good, sir," said the hopeless pupil to his English teacher. "I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears and out the other."

"Goes in both ears and out the other?" asked the puzzled teacher. "But you only have two ears."

"You see, sir? I'm no good at math, either."
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / "They laughed at Joan of Arc, \ /
\ _/ but she went right ahead \_ /
/ / and built it." \ - Gracie Allen
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / A road map will tell us \ /
\ _/ everything we need to know... \_ /
/ / except how to fold it up again. \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / \ /
\ _/ If I'm not back in 5 minutes, \_ /
/ / wait longer... \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / I joined a health club last \ \_/ ////
\ / year, spent about 400 bucks. \ /
\ _/ Haven't lost a pound. \_ /
/ / Apparently you have to show up. \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / If you are going to try \ /
\ _/ cross-country skiing, \_ /
/ / start with a small country. \ _ ____________________________ _
/ ) Thomas S. Ellsworth ( / / tellswor@slonet.org \ _( (_ http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor _) )_
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
[GCFL.net] Kid Comments

* A kindergarten teacher asked, "What is the shape of the earth?" One little girl spoke up: "According to my daddy -- terrible!"

* Trying to come to the aid of his father, who was stopped by an officer for speeding, the little tyke piped up, "Yeah? Well, if we were speeding, so were you!"

* Two kids were trying to figure out what game to play. One said, "Let's play doctor." "Good idea," said the other. "You operate, and I'll sue."

* I guess you can get too health conscious... The wife and I don't have a lot of "junk food" in the house. Upon eating a snack of some munchies or other, my grandson asked what vitamins they had in them. I told him I doubted there were any at all. He replied wide-eyed, "You mean these are just for fun?"

Received from You Make Me Laugh.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Warning Sign

I recently attended a small business-marketing seminar at which the speaker used actual examples to reinforce her teaching points. She told a delightful story about a coffee shop that distinguished itself from the competition by prominently displaying a warning sign that read: "Unattended children will be given a double espresso and a free puppy!"

Received from Jay T.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] New Patio

My husband, Ray, was attempting to build a patio for the first time. He bought 100 cement blocks. Laying them out in a pattern, he discovered the chosen area was too small.

He stacked the blocks against the house and cleared more space. The next day Ray put the cement blocks back down, only to find that the ground was too hard to keep the patio level.

He ordered a truckload of sand to be delivered the following morning. Again he stacked the 100 blocks against the house.

Observing all this, our next-door neighbor asked, "Ray, are you going to put your patio away every night?"

Received from Steve Sanderson.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Collect Call

My mother was away all weekend at a business conference.

During a break, she decided to call home collect. My six-year-old brother picked up the phone and heard a stranger's voice say, "We have a Betty on the line. Will you accept the charges?"

Frantic, he dropped the receiver and came charging outside screaming, "Dad! They've got Mom! And they want money!"

Received from Cybersalt Digest.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Head Check

One weekend my friend, a nurse, was looking after her six-year-old nephew when he fell off a playground slide and hit his head.

Worried that he might have a concussion, she checked him all night. Every hour, she'd gently shake him and ask, "What's your name?" Soon, he began moaning in protest each time she entered the room.

When Sally went in at 5:00 A.M., she found something white on his forehead. Leaning close, she saw a crayon-scrawled message taped to his forehead.

It read: "My name is Daniel."

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
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"The Lie-Clock"

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks.
Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have

never moved, indicating that she never

told a lie."

"Incredible", said the man. "And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Clinton's clock?" asked the man.

"Clinton's clock is in Jesus's office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Thanks to Norma Kay
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Hillary Clinton was spending the morning at a primary school in Ithaca, New York talking to the children about her job as a US Senator. After her talk, she offered question time. One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is.

"My name is Kenneth."

"And what is your question, Kenneth?"

"I have three questions:
First - Whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - Why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
And third - Whatever happened to all the stuff you and President Clinton took when you left the White House?"

Just then the bell rang for recess. Hillary Clinton informed the kids that they would continue after recess. When they resumed, Hillary said, "Okay, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time.

Who has a question?"

A different little boy raised his hand; the esteemed Senator from New York pointed him out and asked him what his name is.

"My name is Larry."

"And what is your question, Larry?"

"I have five questions:
First - Whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - Why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
Third - Whatever happened to all the stuff you and President Clinton took when you left the White House?
Fourth - Why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
And fifth - What happened to Kenneth?..."

Thanks to Eric Morrison
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This is what happens when you don't listen.

When Osama bin Laden died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates.
He slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive?"
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed."
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"
Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Osama with a long cane and snarled, "It was evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."
The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.
As Osama lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Bin Laden wept and said, "This is not what you promised me."
The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?"

Thanks to Eric Morrison
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LETTER FROM CAMP

Dear Mom and Dad,

Our Royal Ranger Commander told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are okay. Only one of our tents and 2 sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when it happened.

Oh yes, please call Adam's mother and tell her he is okay. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found Adam in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning.

Commander Mike got mad at Adam for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas will blow up? The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did and also some of our clothes. Matthew is going to look weird until his hair grows back.

We will be home on Saturday if Commander Mike gets the bus fixed. It wasn't his fault about the wreck. The brakes worked okay when we left. Commander Mike said that with a bus that old you have to expect something to break down; that's probably why he can't get insurance. We think it's a neat bus. He doesn't care if we get it dirty, and if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the fenders. It gets pretty hot with 45 people in a bus made for 24.

He let us take turns riding in the trailer until the highway patrol man stopped and talked to us.

Commander Mike is a neat guy. Don't worry, he is a good driver.In fact, he is teaching Jesse how to drive on the mountain roads where there isn't any cops. All we ever see up there are logging trucks.

This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming out to the rapids. Commander Mike wouldn't let me because I can't swim, and Adam was afraid he would sink because of his cast--it's concrete ( because we didn't have any plaster), so he let us take the canoe out, instead. It was great. You can still see some of the trees under the water from the flood.

Commander Mike isn't crabby like some commanders. He didn't even get mad about the life jackets. He has to spend a lot of time working on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.

Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Andrew dived into the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works. Steven and I threw up, but Commander Mike said it probably was just food poisoning from the leftover chicken. He said they got sick that way with food they ate in the Marines in Nam.

I'm so glad he got out of the Marines and became our commander. He said he sure figured out how to get things done better while he was doing his time. By the way, what is a section ate?

I have to go now. We are going to town to mail our letters and buy some more dynamite and ammo. Don't worry about anything. We are fine.

Love, Grant

Thanks to Daphne Roberts
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.

*Ten for Sure*

My friend, the manager of a grocery store, nabbed a shoplifter in the act. He was escorting the suspect to the office in the front of the store (near the cash registers), when the shoplifter broke from his grip and tried to run.

After a scuffle, my friend pinned him against the wall and looked up to see a number of surprised customers staring at him.

"Everything's fine, Folks," he reassured them. "This guy just tried to go through the express line with more than ten items."

(-:][:-)

*Parts is Parts*

A parts manager for a small electronics shop, had occasion to order part No. 669 from the factory. But when he received it he noticed that someone had sent part No. 699 instead.

Furious at the factory's incompetence, he promptly sent the part back along with a letter giving them a piece of his mind.

Less than a week later, he received the same part back with a letter containing just four words: "TURN THE PART OVER."

(-:][:-)

*Four Letter Surgery*

Jerry is recovering from day surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.

"I'm ok but I didn't like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered.

"What did he say," asked the nurse.

"OOPS!"

(-:][:-)

*Poor Vagabond*

A poor vagabond, traveling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside Inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon."

He knocked gently on the door.

The Innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window.

"Could ye spare some victuals?" he asked politely.

The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition. "No!" she said rather sternly.

"Could I just have a pint of ale?"

"No!" she said again.

"Could I at least sleep in your stable?"

"No!" by this time she was fairly shouting.

The vagabond said, "Might I please...?"

"What now?" the woman interrupted impatiently.

"D'ye suppose," he asked, "I might have a word with George?"

(-:][:-)

*Harmonica Gift*

Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas," Little Johnny said to his Uncle Rodney, the first time he saw him after the holidays. "It's the best Christmas present I ever got."

"That's great," said his Uncle Rodney. "Do you know how to play it?"

"Oh, I don't play it," Little Johnny said. "My mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and my dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night."

(-:][:-)

Eye Laugh

"Central Squirrel"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=7

"Body by Home Depot"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw228

"Snowman Preaching"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=8

"Branch Office"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=9

"Cat Kung Fu"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=10

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/secret_shopper.html - - Secret Shopper "'I'm not going in there. No way. Forget it.' My seventy-something mother's stance was as rigid as her words; arms folded across her chest, unyielding legs pointed away from the shop I'd just suggested..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Science News for Kids - - http://www.sciencenewsforkids.org/ - - Science News for Kids is a new Web site devoted to science news for children of ages 9 to 13. Our goal is to offer timely items of interest to kids, accompanied by suggestions for hands-on activities, books, articles, Web resources, and other useful materials. Our emphasis is on making the Web site appealing by offering kids opportunities to comment on the subject matter, ask questions of scientists featured in articles, try out mathematical puzzles, and submit their own work for possible Web publication. At the same time, we are interested in offering teachers creative ways of using science news in their classrooms.
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Body Mass Index - - http://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/dnpa/bmi/ - - The term BMI is often used when discussing the obesity epidemic, but what is BMI? BMI stands for Body Mass Index. It is a number that shows body weight adjusted for height. BMI can be calculated with simple math using inches and pounds, or meters and kilograms. For adults aged 20 years or older, BMI falls into one of these categories: underweight, normal, overweight, or obese.
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The New Military? American Troop Strength - - http://www.pbs.org/now/politics/troopsforiraq.html - - Companion site to PBS special on American troop strength. American troop strength is still close to the lowest levels since the beginning of the Cold War - the high for active duty Army personnel was reached in 1968 at 1,570,343. In December, 2004 that figure stood at 494,112.
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Google Mars - - http://www.google.com/mars/ - - In collaboration with NASA researchers at
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Arizona State University, Google has created some of the most detailed scientific maps of Mars ever made. Related site: NASA Mars Mission Home Page - - http://mars.jpl.nasa.gov/
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FirstGov: Government Science Portal - - http://www.science.gov/ - - This gateway to government science information allows searches across 30 databases and more than 1,700 science Web sites. Science.gov currently accesses over 47 million pages of government science information.
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Women in Broadcasting History - - http://www.lib.umd.edu/LAB/exhibits/leadingrole/ - - The Library of American Broadcasting at the University of Maryland holds an assortment of archival collections pertaining to women's contributions to American radio and television. This exhibit offers a sampling of items drawn from those collections. The exhibit provides a glimpse into the lives and careers of 16 American women who worked in broadcasting during its most crucial years of development and expansion, in the mid-20th century.
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Science of Gardening - - http://www.exploratorium.edu/gardening/ - - Like all great endeavors, gardening is both a science and an art. This Exploratorium site demonstrates how the plants we tend feed our bodies, our minds, and our senses.
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------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 23, 2006
Today's Message is from Doug Thompson (a Houston Albemarle employee).
Storing and Using Household Chemicals

Here are some helpful hints.

Keep products in their original containers.
Always store containers upright, not on their side.
Make sure labels are securely fixed to containers and are readable.
Keep chemicals in a cool, dry place, out of reach of children and pets.
Never mix products together. The results could be dangerous - even deadly.
Buy only what you need and use it all up.
Share extras (such as leftover paint) with friends and neighbors.

Source - Texas Commission on Environmental Quality (TCEQ)
http://163.234.20.106/assistance/hhw/store_use.html

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 22, 2006
Dangerous Combination of Chemicals
Safety From The Heart by John McIver

Saturday morning, my wife decided to remove some scuff marks from the floor in the kitchen. While cleaning, she decided to move the stove out from the wall and clean from behind it. She tried Spic & Span and water. This did not remove the soiled area, so she tried Greased Lightning in the spray bottle. This also did not remove the soiled area. So she resorted to
Clorox.
When she poured the Clorox on the area, she saw vapors rising. She immediately smelled the fumes of the fatal mixture. She covered her mouth and nose with her arm to prevent being overcome with fumes. Being in poor health, she was lucky that she could get to the back door to get fresh air.

I was asleep in the recliner and she decided she better check on me to see if I was OK. We both were OK, but this could have resulted in an emergency situation. It took several hours for her to stop coughing and for her nose and eyes to stop watering from this dangerous combination of chemicals.

Please be careful when mixing any household cleaning products.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 21, 2006
Another Fire Related Death
Today's Message is from Dick Waller (a Houston Albemarle employee).

I was thinking, what could I tell you folks about day-to-day safety that you haven't already heard. I did not want to repeat anything you have heard over and over.... that was until 2:30 a.m. this morning. I responded to a house fire in the city. There was a victim and I was the one who found her.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE check your smoke detector. Make sure it's working properly. If you don't have a smoke detector, get one. Get it installed, don't make another fireman have to find you or your loved one like I did today.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 20, 2006
Fire Fatalities in Orangeburg
Today's Safety From the Heart message was submitted by Keith Black.

Having been in the fire service for a number of years it seems like we hear more now than ever before about fire-related deaths. Fire death tragedies have been all around us so far in 2006, three deaths within a twenty-mile radius of Orangeburg last week. This is truly hard for me to understand with all the modern devices we have to prevent this from happening. Having been closely involved with one of these fatalities, which was a ten-year-old boy, makes me think that as responsible adults we are obligated to see that our families are safe.

Now how do we do that? Spend lots of money on high dollar smoke detectors and fire alarm systems. NO. Good planning with our families is the best prevention -- having regular discussions and developing escape routes for each family member. Each area of the home should have several planned escape routes. You will be surprised at how well a five or six-year-old child will remember what to do in an emergency, but it is up to us to see that they are taught how to do them.

The ten-year-old I spoke of earlier would not have been a statistic if the family would have had planned escape routes. How do I know this? I found him sitting up in his bed less than two feet away from his bedroom window.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 17, 2006
Hesitate When the Light Turns Green
Prepared by Joe Sanders, BRT employee

Traffic around Baton Rouge has been and continues to be quite heavy. The simple trips now take longer than they did a year ago. Many of us have not changed our habits and do not allow more time to get from point to point. People seem anxious and more willing to take chances as they drive. I have noticed an even greater number of drivers since the Katrina population boom that speed up as traffic signals turn to yellow then red, rather than sit through another cycle. This seems particularly true in the parish outside of the city limit.

When the signal turns green, please hesitate long enough to be sure the intersection is clear. If someone runs the light and hits you, even though you may be legally in the right, you can still be injured.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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After Reading THIS, you'll NEVER look at a banana in the same way again!

Bananas Containing three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber, a banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression:
According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.

PMS:
Forget the pills -- eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia:
High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure:
This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it the perfect way to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.

Brain Power:
200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Constipation:
High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.

Hangovers:
One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn:
Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness:
Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites:
Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves:
Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at work?
Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and chips. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers:
The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature control:
Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD):
Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan.

Smoking:
Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress:
Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.

Strokes:
According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine," eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrates, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around. So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"

Thanks to Norma Kay
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I sat in my seat of the Boeing 767 waiting for everyone to hurry and stow their carry-ons and grab a seat so we could start what I was sure to be a long, uneventful flight home.
With the huge capacity and slow moving people taking their time to stuff luggage far too big for the overhead and never paying much attention to holding up the growing line behind them, I simply shook my head knowing that this flight was not starting out very well. I was anxious to get home to see my loved ones so I was focused on my issues and just felt like standing up and yelling for some of these clowns to get their act together.
I knew I couldn't say a word so I just thumbed thru the "Sky Mall" magazine from the seat pocket in front of me.
You know it's really getting rough when you resort to the over priced, useless sky mall crap to break the monotony.
With everyone finally seated, we just sat there with the cabin door open and no one in any hurry to get us going although we were well past the scheduled take off time.
No wonder the airline industry is in trouble I told myself.
Just then, the attendant came on the intercom to inform us all that we were being delayed.
The entire plane let out a collective groan.
She resumed speaking to say "We are holding the aircraft for some very special people who are on their way to the plane and the delay shouldn't be more than 5 minutes.
The word came after waiting six times as long as we were promised that I was finally going to be on my way home.
Why the hoopla over "these" folks?
I was expecting some celebrity or sport figure to be the reason for the hold up ..
Just get their butts in a seat and let's hit the gas I thought.
The attendant came back on the speaker to announce in a loud and excited voice that we were being joined by several U.S. Marines returning home from Iraq!!!
Just as they walked on board, the entire plane erupted into applause.
The men were a bit taken by surprise by the 340 people cheering for them as they searched for their seats.
They were having their hands shook and touched by almost everyone who was within an arm's distance of them as they passed down the aisle. One elderly woman kissed the hand of one of the Marines as he passed by her.
The applause, whistles and cheering didn't stop for a long time.
When we were finally airborne, I was not the only civilian checking his conscience as to the delays in "me" getting home, finding my easy chair, a cold beverage and the remote in my hand.
These men had done for all of us and I had been complaining silently about "me" and "my" issues I took for granted the everyday freedoms I enjoy and the conveniences of the American way of life.
I took for granted that others had paid the price for my ability to moan and complain about a few minutes delay to "me" while those Heroes were going home to their loved ones.
I attempted to get my selfish outlook back in order and minutes before we landed, I suggested to the attendant that she announce over the speaker a request for everyone to remain in their seats until our heroes were allowed to gather their things and be first off the plane.
The cheers and applause continued until the last Marine stepped off and we all rose to go about our too often taken for granted everyday freedoms.

I felt proud of them.

I felt it an honor and a privilege to be among the first to welcome them home and say "Thank You for a job well done."
I vowed that I will never forget that flight nor the lesson learned. I can't say it enough, THANK YOU to those Veterans and active servicemen and women who may read this and a prayer for those who cannot because they are no longer with us.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

WELCOME HOME! AND THANKS FOR A JOB WELL DONE!!!!!

Thanks to Dianne Mellow
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You can help reach seekers with the real Truth about Jesus! With the release of "The Da Vinci Code" movie just weeks away, millions of people will soon be presented with a very distorted view of Jesus and Christianity. Amazingly, Sony Pictures is promoting this film with a marketing campaign themed "Seek the Truth."
As part of Campus Crusade for Christ's efforts to show people how they can find the only real Truth in the Jesus Christ of the Bible, Josh McDowell has completed a new book entitled The Da Vinci Code: A Quest for Answers.
To learn more about how you can help Campus Crusade mail a copy of this book to every home in the United States, as well as receive your own copy, click here.

Or visit: http://give2.ccci.org/featured/da-vinci-email

Thank you for your support of these efforts.
Gratefully Yours in Christ,
Steve Sellers
Vice President of the Americas
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Why Go To Church?

A Church goer wrote a letter to the editor of a newspaper and complained that it made no sense to go to church every Sunday. "I've gone for 30 years now," he wrote, "and in that time I have heard something like 3,000 sermons.

But for the life of me, I can't remember a single one of them. So, I think I m wasting my time and the pastors are wasting theirs by giving sermons at all."

This started a real controversy in the "Letters to the Editor" column, much to the delight of the editor. It went on for weeks until someone wrote this clincher:
"I've been married for 30 years now. In that time my wife has cooked some 32,000 meals. But, for the life of me, I cannot recall the entire menu for a single one of those meals. But I do know this ... They all nourished me and gave me the strength I needed to do my work. If my wife had not given me these meals, I would be physically dead today.

Likewise, if I had not gone to church for nourishment, I would be spiritually dead today!"

Thank God for our physical AND our spiritual nourishment!

When you are DOWN to nothing.... God is UP to something!

Faith sees the invisible, believes the incredible and receives the impossible!

"When Satan is knocking at your door, simply say, "Jesus, could you get that for me?"

Thanks to Greg McDaniel
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Little something to put things in perspective...

After a forest fire in Yellowstone National Park The forest rangers began their trek up a mountain to assess the inferno's damage.

One ranger found a bird literally petrified in ashes, perched statuesquely on the ground at the base of a tree.

Somewhat sickened by the eerie sight, he knocked over the bird with a stick.
When he gently struck it, three tiny chicks scurried from under their dead mother's wings.
The loving mother, keenly aware of impending disaster, had carried her offspring to the base of the tree and had gathered them under her wings, instinctively knowing that the toxic smoke would rise.

She could have flown to safety but had refused to abandon her babies.

Then the blaze had arrived and the heat had scorched her small body.

The mother had remained steadfast.
She had been willing to die, so those under the cover of her wings would live.

"He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge."(Psalm 91:4)
Being loved this much should make a difference in your life.

Remember the One who loves you,
and then be different because of it.

Please read on . . .

To realize the value of a sister
Ask someone who doesn't have one.

To realize the value of ten years:
ask a newly divorced couple

To realize the value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize the value of one year:
Ask a student who has failed a final exam.

To realize the value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of one minute:
Ask a person who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize the value of one-second:
Ask one who has survived an accident.

To realize the value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won
a silver medal in the Olympics.

Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend: Lose one.

Thanks to David Kirkpatrick
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Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you? If any man destroys the temple of God, God will destroy him, for the temple of God is holy, and that is what you are. - 1 Co 3:16-17 (NASB95)

This is probably one of the most misused passages in the entire Bible. I venture to say that most of you have already decided that you know what these verses mean. “My body is God’s temple and I must take care of it.” Right? Wrong!

We could rush into the Greek to get a proper perspective, but let’s do it from the English (any translation will do). Who is Paul writing to? Correct: Christians. Ah, but we are not finished yet. In particular, what Christians is Paul writing to? OK. Right again. He is writing to the Christians who compose the Church at Corinth. Good. One more question: if he is writing to the church then is the “you” in these verses singular or plural? Ah ha! Right again. You certainly are a sharp group! The “you” is plural (you all for you southerners). This is verified by a look at the Greek. The word “you” is indeed plural. So Paul is saying, “Do you all not know that you all are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you all?” See what I mean? Paul is not talking about my physical body. He is talking about the Body of Christ in Corinth.

Another question: why is Paul writing this to them? Remember the context of the chapter. Right again! He is writing to correct the divisions that plague the Corinthian church. Paul started this discussion in chapter one and paused his discussion in chapter two to talk about the superiority of God’s wisdom – the foundational teaching of 1 Corinthians. He has picked up his argument about sectarianism again in this chapter.

Now, another question (I’m just full of them, aren’t I – but you are so good at answering them). What is Paul telling the Corinthian church about the part of the Body of Christ that dwells in Corinth? Let’s recap; the right answer will follow easily. The “you” is plural referring to the church body not the personal body. The context of the passage is fighting divisions. The Spirit of God dwells in the Body of Christ in Corinth. The Spirit of God is the mind of God given by Jesus so that the church may have God’s presence after Jesus ascended into heaven. Are you with me so far? Now for the touchy part, any man who tries to destroy the Body of Christ, that’s our spiritual fellowship, will be destroyed by God.

Whoa! That is pretty strong language. But, alas, that is exactly what Paul says, but what does he MEAN? From what we know of the Corinthian church, there were those in the body who were trying to pull it apart by saying that those baptized by one preacher were more “saved” or “better Christians” than those baptized by another. Paul wants the leaders of these sectarian groups to understand the seriousness of what they are doing. Should they succeed in dividing the Corinthian church asunder, they will likewise be destroyed, not by satan (for they are doing his work) but by God! Kinda takes your breath away, doesn’t it?

Why is this such a serious offence to God? Because the Sprit of God dwells in the local church, that church is holy, sanctified, set aside for God’s service. Now Paul brings it all home: “and that is what you are.” Paul wants the Corinthians to know that they, as a whole, are holy! They are God’s children, part of His great family! They are special in His sight.

It doesn’t take much of a leap to understand that your local congregation is in the same position as the Corinthian church. Paul is writing to us every bit as much as he was writing to the Corinthians. Woe be to the guy, or gal, who sets out to divide and destroy the Body of Christ in … your town. Selah. Pause and think about that.

-=+=-

According to the grace of God which was given to me, like a wise master builder I laid a foundation, and another is building on it. But each man must be careful how he builds on it. For no man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work. If any man’s work which he has built on it remains, he will receive a reward. If any man’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire. - 1 Co 3:10-15 (NASB95)

I’m going to be honest and up front with you. There is a lot in these verses that I just don’t understand. I don’t know what “fire” is. I don’t know what “suffer loss” means. And I don’t know what Paul means by “reward”. I suppose if a man studied long enough and hard enough he might be able to draw some conclusion … but they will not come from this particular text nor its context.

With this in mind, I do believe we can draw some conclusions as to what Paul was saying to the Corinthians. First, remember that he is talking about unity and sectarianism. This is evident from his reference to himself as a builder who is laying a foundation … and others follow behind and build upon what he built. He also mentions that the foundation is Jesus Christ … that leaves little room for dissention.

Second, we know that Paul is writing to believers. The audience is not seekers (those who are interested in Jesus, but have not yet decided to commit to Him). It is not heathens (though some are acting like heathens). The Corinthians are believers. They have placed their faith in Jesus Christ and have committed to Him as their Lord. This is important because only believers can build upon the foundation which is Jesus Christ and His teachings.

Third, Paul assumes that everyone can build upon that foundation and that each person builds with the materials available to him. Some, according to Paul, build with gold, silver, and precious stones. Others build with wood, hay and straw. Paul is speaking figuratively here. If he were not, most of us would be eliminated from ministry because we cannot afford gold, silver, and precious jewels. So then, what are these building materials?

Allow me to state a pre-understanding here. Christians should be serving God, not because they HAVE to, but because they WANT to. There is a difference. Serving God because we have to gives us the impression that we can earn our way into God’s graces. We can’t. If we could, there would have been no need for Jesus to die on the cross. Instead, we serve God because we want to please Him. We are His children … nothing will change that fact. We do not deserve salvation … but He chose us to be adopted into His family. We return His graciousness, His love, by doing things to please Him.

With this fact in mind, we can begin to see that what we do to please God is the material we use to build upon the Foundation. In this way we all have the ability to build with gold, silver, and precious jewels. The widow’s mite (two cents) was “gold”. The pittance of a portion of the Pharisee’s wealth with all of his pomp and circumstance was hay and straw! One gave all. The other gave a portion. One invested her life in the offering. The other invested in a transient “show”. One’s reward was eternal. The other’s was received immediately and had to be renewed each day or week. It was all in the attitude.

We, as American Christians, need to watch our attitudes. Why are we doing what we do for Jesus? Is it for recognition by men? Our construction will not stand the fires of judgment. Is it because we love the Father with such fierceness that we desire to serve Him with all of our hearts … no matter what anyone else sees or says or does? We are building with materials that will stand the tests … and will be further refined by the judgment fires. It’s all in our attitudes!

-=+=-
What then is Apollos? And what is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, even as the Lord gave opportunity to each one. I planted, Apollos watered, but God was causing the growth. So then neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but God who causes the growth. Now he who plants and he who waters are one; but each will receive his own reward according to his own labor. For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, God’s building. - 1 Co 3:5-9 (NASB95)

Can anyone tell me, without looking, who the architect was who designed the Empire State Building? No? Who was the primary contractor? Few people know the answer to these questions … but almost everyone knows what the Empire State Building is and where it is located … and what ape climbed it with a lovely blond in hand! In this case, the building is everything. The architect and the general contractor are insignificant details.

So it is, according to Paul, with Apollos and himself. Paul was the work hand who planted some seed in fertile soil. Apollos came behind and irrigated the fields so that the seed would sprout and produce fruit. The real question is this: where did the life come from? Did it come from the planter? Did it come from the irrigator? Paul tells us that the life was impregnated in the soul by the Spirit of God. The genetic makeup of a seed determines the nature of the growth … and that has nothing to do with the planter or the one who waters. Paul and Apollos were simply workmen doing the will of the Creator.

He continues to say that both were needed for the seeds of salvation to develop into mature plants, but neither is worthy of greater … or any … glory and praise. That all belongs to the Father. It is not that Paul and Apollos labored for naught. Their rewards were yet to come … and the Master would decide what those rewards should be. Until that time, Paul tells us that he and Apollos are simply workers in God’s field, carpenters working on God’s building. Neither is worthy of any praise. Neither desires a disciple group of his own.

Herein lies the danger to modern Christians, whether we are pastors, Sunday school teachers, small group leaders, or anything else. We all tend to seek approval and a following. Get a bunch of preachers together and you will hear questions similar to this: “How many are you running?” While attendance may be a legitimate standard for measuring church growth (and that is debatable), the subtle thought behind the question is this: “Huh, is that all you can muster? I’m doing better than you are.” These same preachers often stretch the truth to make themselves look better: “Oh, our membership totals 1000.” What he is really saying is this: “I don’t have 1000 attending on any given Sunday. As a matter of fact, we haven’t cleaned the roles in 50 years … half those people are dead.”

Don’t laugh. We all do the same. “My Sunday school class has doubled in size in the last year!” “I had 10 kids saved last week in my youth group!” There are even those super spiritual ones who might put it this way: “The Lord has blessed us with double digit growth the past 6 years.” The very fact that the speaker mentions such growth equals the others … and all are putting the “I” factor first!

Paul is shouting: “Cut it out! I am not the important one here. The LORD is the important one. Let’s just cut the crap and mature in Christ and let the Spirit do the math!”

-=+=-

And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual men, but as to men of flesh, as to infants in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food; for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able, for you are still fleshly. For since there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not fleshly, and are you not walking like mere men? For when one says, “I am of Paul,” and another, “I am of Apollos,” are you not mere men? - 1 Co 3:1-4 (NASB95)

Having spent some time discussing the superiority of God’s wisdom over the world’s wisdom, Paul returns to his first topic of concern: divisions amongst the believers. Paul’s demeanor has not dimmed in the intermission, but is if anything more vitriolic than ever. Over the next few sessions, you will see the sharpness of Paul’s comments. Today’s verses are simply an introduction!

The Apostle begins by insisting that the Corinthians are immature (yes, I can almost hear him say, “brats”, though he does not use the term). Remember, when Paul says “spiritual men” he is referring to those who are mature, or at least have a measure of maturity about them. Paul begins in the past tense … talking about the way he treated the Corinthians while he was last with them. At that time he found them immature and unable to comprehend spiritual matters. He had to approach them in simple terms, presenting the Gospel in a way that even the most childish believer could understand.

I think most of us have some knowledge of infants. I remember when our children were first born. Melanie lovingly fed them milk from her own body. This food was, in essence, food that she had digested and reformatted in such a formulation that our daughters could grow strong. After several months, we began to introduce them to puréed foods. You know the stuff: “spinach soufflé” and “glazed carrots” and eventually “baked chicken” and “beef supreme”. All these were lofty names for that nasty stuff that we wouldn’t eat, but willingly gave to our kids. It was almost pre-digested, but not quite. Chewing was certainly not necessary! It wasn’t until much later that we would snip of a bit of our solid food and let them experiment with chewing.

Paul says he gave them “the milk” of the Gospel. They were not ready for solid foods … or even puréed veggies of the Word. The sad part is still to come: “Indeed, even now you are not yet able, for you are still fleshly.” Paul converts to the present tense … things that are happening in the here and now. The Corinthians are still too immature to eat solid spiritual food. They are not able to digest the weightier matters of the Spirit. How does he know this? The jealousy and strife among them speaks of their childish behavior! “I am of Paul.” “I am of Apollos.” “I am of Peter.” “I am of Christ.” Do you kind of get the picture of a bunch of kids fighting over some toy? “It’s mine!” “No, it’s mine! Mommy said I could have it!” Intervention is necessary, and soon!

I was talking with a friend of mine about a method of Bible study that I am learning. I commented that it would be interesting to get about ten pastors of different denominational backgrounds together to study the scriptures together using this method. I wonder if men who believe the Bible is God’s inspired Word could set aside pre-conceived ideas and let God’s Word speak in purity and simplicity. What would happen if they DID listen to the word of Paul, or Peter, or John, or Jesus and let the Word interpret itself … without interference from our own devised wisdom? Could the church be changed for the better? Would our theologies change? For that matter, what would happen if we, as common everyday believers, were to take the same challenge? Would it change us? Our homes? Our churches? Our communities? Oh, if we were mature enough to handle the meat of the Word!

-=+=-

Harley

c. 2006 Harley E. Hudson

If you received Verse of the Day as a forward and you wish to have your own subscription, simply send an e-mail to hhudson719@sbcglobal.net and request a free subscription.
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 11, Number 44 --- 16 March 2006
Tourbus Home - http://www.TOURBUS.com
Best of Tourbus -- http://tourbus.com/best.html
------------------------------------------------------

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Sudoku / PBJ Time

Howdy, y'all, and greetings once again from deep behind the orange curtain in beautiful Irvine, California, where we haven't had an incident of a swagman stealing a jumpbuck and hiding it in his tucker bag for at least three weeks.

---------------
Newsweek Sudoku
---------------

Sudoku is the abbreviation of the Japanese phrase "suuji wa dokushin ni kagiru" which, depending on translation, means either

"The digits must remain single"
or
"In jail we had to be in this dumb kabuki play about the Forty- seven Ronin, and I wanted to be Yoshi, but they made me Ori!"

Homer Simpson quotes aside, Sudoku is a wildly popular and challenging logic puzzle You've probably seen it in your local newspaper. In Sudoku,

you are given a 9x9 grid. Some of the grid squares already contain numbers -- you cannot change these. To work the puzzle, fill in the empty squares of the grid with the numerals 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8, and 9.

The puzzle is solved when each ROW, each COLUMN, and each 3x3 square within the puzzle contain the numerals 1 through 9 with each numeral appearing once. The 3x3 squares are differentiated by shading. [Source: Newsweek Sudoku Help]

You already knew that, didn't you? Well, what you may not know is that our friends at Newsweek magazine, with the help of uclick, have a free web page that lets you play Sudoku online:

http://www.uclick.com/client/nwk/nwdoc/

Three Sudoku puzzles are available every day. (1) The normal 9x9 puzzle we all know and love; (2) A smaller 6x6 mini puzzle. This is a great place to start if you've never played Sudoku before; (3) A massive 16x16 puzzle that uses both numbers and letters. This is not for the faint of heart.

Newsweek's Sudoku puzzles also offer both a cheat and a bug. The cheat is that if you click in an empty square and then press the spacebar on your keyboard, Newsweek will automatically show you the entries which are possible for each square. This makes the puzzles MUCH easier, although the "hints" in the mega puzzles are so small they're almost illegible.

As for the bug, the first time you complete a row, column, or square, the game will display an "About the Lights" pop-up box. At the bottom of the box are the words "Don't show this message the next time I play this game" but [at least on my computer] there is no checkbox. Well, there is a check box, it's just invisible. Move your pointer to the left of the "Don't show this..." sentence and, if you're lucky, your pointer will change into a finger. Click your mouse, and then close the pop-up window. Problem solved.

If you are addicted to Sudoku, or if you have never played it and want to see what everyone is talking about, hop on over to Newsweek's free Sudoku page and watch the hours slowly disappear from your life. :)

----------------------
Info for Web Designers
----------------------

[Warning: This next part is kind of advanced stuff. Please accept my apologies in advance.]

If you create web pages that display active content such as embedded QuickTime movies, RealPlayer movies, Java Applets, or Flash, Shockwave, or Authorware players, check out

http://www.macromedia.com/devnet/activecontent/

In their February 26-ish Windows/Microsoft Update, our friends in Redmond fundamentally changed the way Internet Explorer handles embedded, active content. From here forward, "Active content that is embedded in HTML pages in certain ways will not be able to receive user input (for example, keyboard or mouse events) until the user clicks to either activate or continue loading the control." You can find a short Breeze presentation on this topic, and a possible fix [a js "design around" solution], at
http://adobe.breezecentral.com/activecontent022606/

-------------------------------------
Meme Review: Peanut Butter Jelly Time
-------------------------------------

I want to spend some time over the next couple of months re-introducing you to different internet phenomena, the stuff that was once really, really popular and then quickly fell out of favor. Think of this as an internet pop culture history tour. Today's stop is at

http://home.comcast.net/~etrata/flash/banana.swf

This is what happens when you throw together an old Buckwheat Boys song, a copy of Macromedia Flash, and way too much free time.

Have a safe and happy week, and we'll talk again soon.

TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPIC: Unforgotten / PopoZao

Howdy, y'all, and greetings once again from deep behind the orange curtain in beautiful Irvine, California, a Polish mathematician who, in 1932, solved the Enigma machine.

--------------------
Unseen. Unforgotten.
--------------------

In November 2004, while searching through an equipment closet at the Birmingham News, Alexander Cohn discovered a cardboard box labled "Keep. Do Not Sell." The box contained the negatives of some 5,000 photographs taken between 1950 and 1965, including 2,000 photographs that were never published in The News.

Why is this important? Well, most of the pictures were of the United States Civil Rights Movement.

On Sunday, February 26, the Birmingham News published 32 of these photographs in a special, eight page section titled "Unseen. Unforgotten." You can find an Adobe Acrobat version of that section online at

http://www.al.com/unseen/unseen.pdf

The Birmingham News also created a companion web site at

http://www.al.com/unseen/

that contains additional, unpublished photographs and audio interviews about the Civil Rights Movement. [You make be asked to key in your zip code and age in order to see these. If you are outside of the United States, just use the University of Alabama's zip code: 35487.]

As the newspaper of record for central Alabama, the photographers of the Birmingham News were front-and-center to witness and record most of the Civil Rights Movement from the Freedom Riders to the integration of the University of Alabama [my alma mater] to Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. to civil disobedience to Bull Connor ... and the list goes on. The 2,000 negatives are a time capsule that give us a glimpse into a turbulent and oftentimes shameful period of American history.

-----------------------------
The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow
-----------------------------

In 2002, Public Broadcasting aired a four-part, Peabody award-winning documentary that looked at American race relations in the 100 years between the Civil War and the Civil Rights Movement. While the documentary is not available online [which is a shame], the series' companion web site is still available at

http://www.pbs.org/wnet/jimcrow/

Jim Crow is a term describing the American racist culture against blacks [and] it originated as a derogatory way of depicting black people in the minstrel shows of early 19th century America. Thomas Dartmouth "Daddy" Rice popularized the term by marking his face with burned cork or a charcoal paste (known as black face), dressing in sloppy clothes, and dancing a silly jig while grinning broadly ... By the 1890s, the term had come to mean the separation of blacks from whites and the general customs and laws that subordinated blacks as an inferior people.
[Source: http://www.jimcrowhistory.org/ ]

PBS's "The Rise and Fall of Jim Crow" website offers:

- An historical timeline of Jim Crow from 1863 to 1954.
- Audio and video narratives, photographs, and rare documents.
- Interactive maps.
- Tools and activites that show you some of the obstacles
inherent in Jim Crow.
- And much more.

If you are interested in learning more about the "why" behind the pictures in the Birmingham News' "Unseen. Unforgiven" collection, you really should visit

http://www.pbs.org/wnet/jimcrow/

------------------------------------
Meme Review: Peanut Butter Federline
------------------------------------

On a much less serious topic, last week we visited

http://home.comcast.net/~etrata/flash/banana.swf

Remember that. We're going to come back to that in a moment. Well, Britney Spears husband Kevin Federline recently released a dance single titled "PopoZao." You can see a video of Federline in the studio jamming to a playback of PopoZao at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRGoo_k03Tw

Critics were unimpressed with the song, and some enterprising pranksters took it upon themselves to remix Federline's "masterpiece". I don't know about you, but I think the new version is significantly more danceable. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7cAYK9GYHY

+----------------------------------------+

Have a safe and happy week, and we'll talk again soon.

TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 11, Number 45 --- 21 March 2006
Tourbus Home - http://www.TOURBUS.com
Best of Tourbus -- http://tourbus.com/best.html
-----------------------------------------------------

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Tourbus is Dead / Reformat

Time for an important announcement... Tourbus is dead. Long live InternetTourbus! What do I mean? Sigh... it's all Google's fault. You can read all about that in today's issue. Also, a tutorial on (maybe) reformatting your hard drive, and the Top Twenty revisited.

-----------------------------------
The New InternetTourbus (dot com)
-----------------------------------

Last summer, for reasons that remain shrouded in mystery, Google decided to drop TOURBUS.COM from their index. As a result, TOURBUS ceased to exist in the eyes of Google. After enjoying a pagerank of 7 or 8 for many years, with hundreds of indexed pages and thousands of inbound links, TOURBUS.COM simply vanished from Google. If you do a search for "info:tourbus.com" Google will reply:

> Sorry, no information is available for the URL tourbus.com

No amount of entreaty would elicit a reason or remedy from Google, so we were stuck. Since Google is the only search engine that really matters (in terms of bringing searchers to a site), traffic to TOURBUS.COM had trailed off to a small fraction of what it once was. The best solution was to start from scratch with a new domain name. So from now on, the official website for TOURBUS is...

http://www.InternetTourbus.com

I've also taken the opportunity to freshen up the website with a new design and some new features. Pop in today and check out the Tourbus Screensaver, Very Strange Things, the Pop Quiz, and of course the complete Tourbus Archives from 1995 to 2006.

------------
Got Links?
------------

TOURBUS.COM will continue to work for now, but it may be discontinued at some point. So please... if you have links to TOURBUS.COM, update them to point to INTERNETTOURBUS.COM as soon as possible. If you DON'T yet have a link to Tourbus, visit the page below and pick up the link code and graphic to put on your site.

http://www.InternetTourbus.com/button.htm

-------------------------------
Reformat hard drive under XP?
-------------------------------

A reader asked me this question about reformatting his hard drive:

> "I have Windows XP and the system has gotten very slow and
> flaky. I would like to learn how to reformat the drive. Can
> you teach me in simple English how to completely format the
> drive and then re-install the operating system?"

It's certainly doable, but you should consider some alternatives first, because formatting a hard drive will erase *everything* on the disk. Re-installing Windows, all the patches from Microsoft, your software and personal files will take many hours to complete.

I'm guessing you're considering this move because your PC has been infested by spyware and/or viruses, and is now acting flaky. I suggest you first read my "Make Windows Run Faster!" article, and follow my recipe to clean gunk out of your computer's pipes.

http://askbobrankin.com/make_windows_xp_run_faster.html

...then if you REALLY still want to reformat your drive, see
http://askbobrankin.com/reformat_hard_drive_under_xp.html

----------------
The Top Twenty
----------------

Every few months I go through the AskBobRankin logs and see which articles were the most popular. Here are the current Top Twenty, ranked by readership volume...

1) House Values
http://askbobrankin.com/house_values.html

2) Make Windows XP Run Faster!
http://askbobrankin.com/make_windows_xp_run_faster.html

3) Red X Appears Instead of Image
http://askbobrankin.com/red_x_appears.html

4) Convert Itunes to MP3 Format
http://askbobrankin.com/convert_itunes_to_mp3_format.html

5) Removing Winfixer Popups
http://askbobrankin.com/removing_winfixer_popups.html

6) Convert VHS to DVD
http://askbobrankin.com/convert_vhs_to_dvd.html

Continue reading for the rest of the Top Twenty here:

http://askbobrankin.com/the_top_twenty.html

That's all for now, see you next time! -- Bob Rankin

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==

The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238 Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
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Activities and Events of Interest
~~~
Investing for Retirement Class at SAU - Tuesday, April 4
Dr. David Ashby, the Peoples Bank Professor of Economics at SAU, will advise people about investing for retirement. This course will cover the basics of retirement planning from calculating how much is needed, to what type of accounts to use, to where to invest the money. Participants will learn how to save income taxes while saving for retirement. The class will also look at how mutual funds can simplify the whole process.
This class will be offered from 6 to 8 p.m. on Tuesday, April 4, in Business 205.
There is no charge to participate in this course.
~~~
Albemarle Steak and Bingo Supper - April 22, 2006
~~~
The Barksdale AFB Holiday in Dixie "Defenders Of Liberty" Big Airshow Saturday and Sunday, May 13-14, gates open at 9:00 am, Show starts at 10:00 am
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Cpl. Nyle Yates III, 22, of Lake Odessa, Mich., died in Bayji, Iraq, on Mar. 16, when he came under small arms fire by enemy forces during combat operations. Yates was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 187th Infantry, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died in Tikrit, Iraq, on Mar. 16, when a mortar round detonated. Killed were:
02. Sgt. Amanda N. Pinson, 21, of St. Louis, Mo.
03. Spc. Carlos M. Gonzalez, 22, of Middletown, N.Y.
Pinson and Gonzalez were assigned to the 101st Military Intelligence Detachment, 501st Special Troops Battalion, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died in Ar Ramadi, Iraq, on March 18, when they came under small arms fire by enemy forces during combat operations. Both solidiers were assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 75th Ranger Regiment, Fort Lewis, Wash. Killed were:
04. Staff Sgt. Ricardo Barraza, 24, of Shafter, Calif.
05. Sgt. Dale G. Brehm, 23, of Turlock, Calif.

06. Pfc. Amy A. Duerksen, 19, of Aberdeen Proving Ground, Md., died in Baghdad, Iraq, on March 11, from a non-combat related injury. Duerksen was assigned to the 4th Combat Support Battalion, 1st Brigade, 4th Infantry Division, Fort Hood, Texas

07. Spc. Antoine J. McKinzie, 25, of Indianapolis, Ind., died in Baghdad, Iraq, on March 21, when his HMMWV came under enemy small arms fire during combat operations. McKinzie was assigned to the 4th Battalion, 27th Field Artillery Regiment, 1st Armored Division, Baumholder, Germany.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
It’s never too early to start making my Anniversary Present list. (Well, I did get a new medicine bag for my birthday.)
Rechargeable Batteries for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (9.6 volts, 600 mAh battery, 2 each (for our two radios)), Yaesu FT-50 (it takes a FNB-83 7.2V1400mAh battery), Yaesu, VX-1 (it takes a FNB-52LI 3.6V 700mAh Lithium-Ion battery).
New “Rubber Ducky” antennas for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (two radios)
Anything from Larry Norman
Back Scratcher
Basic tools of any kind
Batteries, 9 volt
Batteries, AAA
Blankets or Quilts
Book, “The Good Life: Seeking Purpose, Meaning, and Truth in Your Life” by Charles Colson
“Boot” Horn
Chair, office $49 from SAMS (5 of them)
Cheese Grater
Cordless Drill
Cordless Screwdriver
A DeLorme Earthmate GPS LT-20 device
A copy of DeLorme Street Atlas USA 2006 Plus
A copy of DeLorme Topo USA 5.0
Digital Video Recorder (Pioneer DVR-533H-S $333 at Beach Camera)
Eyeglasses, “Computer type” to use at church (and some new ones to use at home and at work.)
Floor Mats (for the truck)
A new “Gitter”
Handkerchiefs
Hasselblad H2D-39 Digital Professional Camera
Hat (warm, for bald guys winter wear.)
Magnifying Glass.
New Showerhead
Non skid toilet rug
Refrigerator Thermometer
Small, lightweight “head light” so I can see small things on the desk or work bench.
Some Warmup Suits to wear around the house after we get that first gas bill.
Trackball for the home computer
VHS - DVD Recorder (Lite-On LVC-9006 $219 @ Buy.com)
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Scheduled Activities
~~~
Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
~~~
Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
~~~
"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
~~~
MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
~~~
MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
~~~
MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
~~~
MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
~~~
MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
~~~
MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
~~~
MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
~~~
MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
~~~
Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
~~~
TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Isa 63:8-9 Hag 1:5-7 Exo 32:21-24 Psa 7:17 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E-mail at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. For the "Blog" version just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com/ to see the latest issue.
Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat".
If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. Of course "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com to see the latest issue (usually updated sometime Friday evening or Saturday morning. We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent. ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Mess Cake

2006-03-19T16:15:00.000-08:00

Volume 8, Issue 11 Friday, March 17, 2006

Hello All,

It was a rough week in Columbia County. Two single vehicle accidents resulted in one death and six young people hospitalized, several in critical condition. The common thread around the “water cooler” was frustration at the “ignorance” of youth. We had all done “dumb” things as youth, but most of us lived through it. But we all had friends who didn’t.
Is there any way to get our experience into young people so they don’t have to experience the pain we did? No one has figured out a way yet.
~~~~~
News of the week. They’ve built a sidewalk in Cullen, LA right in front of Jimmy and Vanessa’s home. Now they can walk to church without walking on the road.
~~~~~
Our sincere sympathy is extended to Jackie Fulton, Tracy Jones, and Laretha Cooper whose mother away last Wednesday.
~~~~~
We extend our sincere sympathy to Debbie Wright in the loss of her mother, Mary Smith, who passed away on Saturday.
~~~~~
Arkansas lost a “squeaker” at the national finals basketball tournament today. I believe the final score was something like 47 to 43.
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this weeks “Bleat” include Aunt Margie’s flowers, Josiah, and the Albemarle Fire Brigade training.
~~~~~
We can’t seem to get our sixth DVD player to show the subtitles on Japanese movies. I’ve tried everything I know. It works fine on French films. So I tried it on our non-TV guardian DVD player. Viola! I can read the subtitles and watch “Ikiru” a wonderful Japanese film from 1952.
~~~~~
“Real” Iraq news (not available on MSM) is available at http://www.michaelyon-online.com/
~~~~~
You might also check out http://www.tellthemididnotcry.com/home.html
Jackie and Jenny Spinner wrote the book “Tell Them I Didn't Cry: A Young Journalist's Story of Joy, Loss, and Survival in Iraq,” published by Scribner. The book chronicles Jackie's time in Iraq reporting for the Washington Post. Her twin sister Jenny, who was Jackie's main contact in the U.S., wrote brief vignettes at the end of each chapter. The program included photographs from the sisters' lives.
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
BATON ROUGE, La., March 16 /PRNewswire-FirstCall/ – Albemarle Corporation (NYSE: ALB), a leading chemistry service provider to the life sciences industry, has been named as one of the production partners in the supply of intermediate chemicals for the antiviral Tamiflu(R) (oseltamivir), produced by Roche.

Roche announced today that it has expanded its global manufacturing network for the production of Tamiflu to increase capacity for the product. The company also announced that the manufacturing network will include several Roche sites and more than 15 external contractors, including Albemarle, in nine different countries.

The production partners for the various steps of manufacture have been selected primarily "on the basis of their ability to produce substantial quantities of intermediates and finished materials in accordance with Roche's quality standards in a relatively short time frame," according to Roche.

"Albemarle is very pleased to be part of the supply chain network Roche has assembled to produce Tamiflu," said Ed Tatum, global business director for Albemarle's Fine Chemistry Services unit. "The need to respond to the growing demand for Tamiflu is one of the most important challenges facing the life sciences industry today. We believe that our selection by Roche for this cGMP manufacturing opportunity is further validation of Albemarle's Fine Chemistry Services capabilities, and we are striving to do our part to ensure that the public health needs for this important product are satisfied completely."

CGMP are the "current Good Manufacturing Practices" followed by pharmaceutical and biotech firms to ensure that their products and intermediates used to make those products meet specific requirements for identity, strength, quality, and purity.
~~~~~
Bible Cure for: Chronic Fatigue and Fibrommyalgia
Dr. Don Colbert (Mar 13, 2006)

Are you feeling drained and depleted from chronic fatigue? In this concise, easy-to-read book you'll discover a wealth of usable information to help you win the battle against chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia once and for all! Learn biblical secrets on health and the latest medical research on how to break free from chronic pain and fatigue! This book contains findings that your doctor may never have told you!
• Steps - from burned out to fired up
• Foods that harm - and foods and supplements that give life
• A walking program - just for you
• God's promise - to strengthen and comfort you

You want to be healthy. God wants you to be healthy. Now at last here's a source of information that will help you get healthy - body, mind and spirit.

More...
http://thewellbookstore.com/item.asp?PID=2668
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com. Older issues can be found at bugsbleat.blogspot.com, bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com, and bugsbleat4q.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.49
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - We’re sharing recipes from Shannon Voigt’s new Taylor Recipe Book
Angel Biscuits Aunt Gertrude Taylor

Ingredients:
1 pkg dry yeast
2 Tbsp. warm water
5 cups flour
¼ cup sugar
3 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. soda
1 cup shortening
3 cups buttermilk

Method:
In warm water combine dry ingredients, cut in shortening and add yeast and buttermilk. Knead well; roll out and cut with biscuit cutter. Slash and fold over. Bake at 375º for 15 to 20 minutes. Dough may be refrigerated and used as needed. My favorite.
~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

When Dad Is Missing
To Own a Dragon and A Dad-Shaped Hole in My Heart

By Kristine Steakley

March 17, 2006

Liberal columnist Maureen Dowd titled her latest book Are Men Necessary? It’s a question that feminists have long joked about, most famously in the fish-on-a-bicycle analogy; but modern reproductive technology and the growing trend of same-sex “marriage” give this question urgency. Does it matter if children grow up without a father? As long as a child is loved and wanted and raised in a nurturing environment, can we sidestep the role of fatherhood and still end up with children who are emotionally healthy?

Mark Earley, president of Prison Fellowship, made it a point to visit juvenile detention centers when he was attorney general of Virginia. In all of his visits, Earley says he met not one kid behind bars who had a father living at home. Indeed, children without fathers are significantly more likely to commit suicide, exhibit behavioral problems, drop out of school, abuse drugs or alcohol, and find themselves in prison.

Two new books address the pain and challenge of growing up without a father. Donald Miller, author of Blue Like Jazz, writes for men in To Own a Dragon, while Christian counselor H. Norman Wright writes for women in A Dad-Shaped Hole in My Heart. Both authors walk their readers through an exploration of the void left by a father’s absence and into the wholeness of God’s perfect Fatherhood.

FAIRY-TALE FATHERS
In To Own a Dragon, Donald Miller begins with a series of stories about the men who influenced his childhood after his father left the family: Bill Cosby as Cliff Huxtable on The Cosby Show, the landlord’s “pothead” son, a slightly unstable Vietnam vet with a penchant for model airplanes, and a very patient youth pastor. Each had a role in shaping Miller’s understanding of what it meant to be a man. Still, the concept of a father was elusive for Miller. “For me a father is nothing more than a character in a fairy tale. And I know fathers are not like dragons in that fathers actually exist, but I don’t remember feeling that a father existed for me . . . in a way I don’t miss having a father any more than I miss having a dragon.”

All of that changed through a pivotal friendship with nature photographer John MacMurray, credited as a co-author on the book for the depth of his influence on Miller. MacMurray and his wife invited Miller to move into their guest quarters. For four years, Miller saw what it meant to be a godly man. “For the first time in my life,” he wrote, “I saw what a father does, what a father teaches a kid, what a husband does around the house, the way a man interacts with the world around him, the way a man—just as does a woman—holds a family together.”

MacMurray’s mentoring marked a turning point for Miller, who now runs a foundation that helps single moms and provides mentors for kids without dads. He likens the interplay of generations to pilots who constantly radio one another to learn about weather conditions ahead and to warn those behind. Without the benefit of wisdom from older men who have been through the same stages of life, many young men find themselves adrift and aimless and stuck in what some are now terming “suspended adolescence.” Miller uses the rest of his book to speak to some of the issues that arise from this loss of direction. He assures men that they are men by virtue of creation and encourages them to act like men, to assume responsibility, to be mature in their dealings with women, and to live with integrity.

Miller’s honest and humorous stories of his own journey to maturation bring a sense of hope and purpose to his writing. He ends by encouraging others who have experienced the deep sense of pain and loss created by a father’s absence to see themselves as “wounded healers,” a phrase he borrows from Bishop Desmond Tutu. The pain that God allows in our lives, Miller says, can be a path to empathy, allowing us to bring the same kind of healing we have experienced ourselves to others who are in the same situation.

“LITTLE GIRL, ARISE”
H. Norman Wright tells the story of Jairus in his book A Dad-Shaped Hole in My Heart. In the biblical account, Jairus, an official at the synagogue, came to Jesus with a desperate plea for his daughter, who was deathly ill. Before they reached the house, a friend arrived with the sad news that Jairus’s daughter had died. But, at the climax of the familiar narrative, Jesus went to Jairus’s house anyway and healed the little girl, bringing her back to life with the words, “Little girl, arise.”

Wright reminds us that daughters were not valued in Jairus’s day and he was exposing himself to potential ridicule for going to so much trouble over one insignificant girl, but love for his daughter compelled him to take the risk. Wright tells his readers that this love and resurrection power is available today for women who have been gravely wounded by an absent father.

Many daughters feel abandoned and forgotten by their fathers. Whether their fathers are simply emotionally absent or are physically absent due to adoption, divorce, or death, these daughters go through life with emptiness in their hearts where a father’s love should be. Wright addresses each of these unique situations individually, detailing the common effects of each on the relational, emotional, and spiritual life of a woman. He leads readers through a series of written exercises that help her identify and understand her places of hurt. Then he guides her through Scriptures that speak to that pain.

Wright maintains that “time by itself is not a healer,” but that “Jesus Christ is and has the answer for a bruised heart.” Too often, he says, we encourage one another to “forgive and forget,” a palliative that masks rather than heals pain. Instead, he urges women to acknowledge the very real issues that may exist in their family, to deal with the past, and to chart a new relationship with their fathers based on acceptance and forgiveness. “Forgiveness,” he writes, “is a medicine for pain. It heals the pain of a wounded memory and the hole in the heart as well as seething rage, resentment, and the chokehold of hate.”

THE PERFECT FATHER
Both Miller and Wright acknowledge that there is only one perfect father: our Father in heaven. Many individuals harboring resentment or anger toward their earthly fathers have difficulty trusting in a God who so often calls Himself our Father. Wright notes that “your father can have a tremendous impact upon . . . your belief in God the Father and your personal relationship with Jesus Christ.” He says that women who grow up without a dad often see God as untrustworthy, unfaithful, distant, and unpredictable. Miller struggled with these same doubts and suspicions of God. “If our earthly fathers are God’s way of communicating His love for us,” he thought, “then apparently God only loves some of us.”

Leaving this fear and distrust of God behind, both authors assert, requires a realization that, as Miller puts it “our fathers aren’t God. They can help us understand who God is and how good He is, but they can also do a lot of damage. But God is God regardless, and if we take the Bible as true, it’s good to think He is fathering us perfectly.” Wright agrees, noting that Jesus acts as our advocate with the Father, and “because of all that He went through here on earth, combined with His complete knowledge of God, He is the one who can show you the way out of your past. He can show you how to respond, how to turn from denial, and how to face whatever the truth may be, opening up a way for you to move forward in your life.”

Fathers matter immensely in the growth to emotional, social, and spiritual maturity. At their best, they give us a glimpse of the love and care that our heavenly Father lavishes on us. And even at their worst, they point us to the God who created the concept of fatherhood and is the only perfect Father for every son and daughter chosen and adopted into His holy family.

Kristine Steakley is a writer for Prison Fellowship.

-----------------------------------
FOR FURTHER READING
Donald Miller and John MacMurray, To Own a Dragon: Reflections On Growing Up Without A Father (Navpress, 2006).

H. Norman Wright, A Dad-shaped Hole In My Heart (Bethany House, 2005).
Suzanne Fields, “The Love Song of Maureen Dowd,” Townhall.com, 14 November 2005.

“The Trouble with Boys,” Newsweek, 30 January 2006.

Kristine Steakley, “Fumbling Childhood: The Bad Results of a Good Divorce,” BreakPoint Online, 3 November 2005.

“Divorce through a Child’s Eyes: Between Two Worlds,” BreakPoint Commentary, 29 November 2005.

“Psychological Cheerleading: Raising Boys without Men,” BreakPoint Commentary, 27 October 2005.

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004 Prison Fellowship.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
crapulous: sick from, or marked by, excessive drinking.
parvenu: an upstart; one newly risen in class or economic status.
manse: a large and imposing residence.
uxorious: excessively fond of or submissive to a wife.
Ides: the fifteenth day of March, May, July, and October, and the thirteenth day of the other months.
megalomania: a mental disorder characterized by delusions of grandeur.
verdant: green.
from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"Before you can do something you must first be something." - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

"Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears." - Marcus Aurelius

"There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Rewards and punishments are the lowest form of education." - Chuang-tzu

"Remember March, the Ides of March remember. Did not great Julius bleed for justice' sake? What villain touched his body, that did stab and not for justice?" - William Shakespeare

"Diamonds are nothing more than chunks of coal that stuck to their jobs." - Malcolm Forbes

"O Paddy dear, an' did ye hear the news that's goin'; round? The shamrock is by law forbid to grow on Irish ground! No more Saint Patrick's Day we'll keep, his colour can't be seen, For there's a cruel law agin the wearin' o' the Green!" - Unknown
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

St. Patrick and the Celtic Christians
Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 17, 2006)

The phrase "Celtic Christianity" is tossed about a lot these days. But what exactly is it?

A 2001 Religious & Ethics PBS interview shed some light on the subject. Said Bob Abernathy concerning the "rediscovery" of Celtic spirituality: "When the pagan Celts of Ireland were converted to Christianity by St. Patrick in the 5th century, they brought with them their love of nature and friendship and their awareness of the sacred in all the most ordinary parts of life."

Judy Valente noted, "A nomadic tribe that first appeared in Eastern Europe hundreds of years before Christ, the Celts migrated westward, finally settling in the green fields of Ireland. The Celts were fierce warriors, but when they weren't at war they lived simple, agrarian lives. They found meaning in the most routine tasks of life, sacredness in the nature around them, and spiritual sustenance in the close ties of friendship, but they also valued solitude and silence. This is the hushed, beautiful, and brooding landscape that was the Celtic environment."

Chicago lawyer Colleen Grace, who attends Old St. Patrick's Church, agreed. "I think what it's all about is bringing God into the everyday ordinariness of life and really, you know, appreciating the special moments that you have here. In the Celtic way of life, there were prayers for everything; there were prayers for waking up in the morning ; there were prayers for preparing breakfast; prayers for preparing the fire; prayers for putting the fire out at night, and, you know, redoing it the next morning. So just the idea that there could actually be prayerful moments in every small detail of what you do made me, I think, look at things a little bit differently. It's a very joyous way of looking at the world, and I don't think you have to be Catholic or Irish at all to appreciate the joy of living."

Theologian John O'Donohue, who came to Chicago to help establish a center for the study of Celtic spirituality, believes St. Patrick found the Celts receptive to Christianity because they already shared their view of the sacredness of nature and of friendship. "I think that there is, in Celtic spirituality, a rhythm of seeing, which can alter the way that one approaches the world," he said, adding this spontaneous blessing: "May the sense of something absent enlarge our lives and may our souls be as free a s the ever-new waves of the sea. May we succumb to the danger of growth. May we live in the neighborhood of wonder. And may we belong to love with the wildness of dance, and may we know that we are ever embraced in the kind circle of God."

The pastor of St. Patrick's Church in Chicago, Father Jack Wall, gave this insight: "One of the things that is the danger in all of spiritual traditions, no matter what it is, and that is that somehow the spiritual experience pulls you away from the experience of life and living. If it is not leading toward the struggle of creating human community, continuing to transform human institutions, being involved in the human enterprise of trying to build up the Earth, somehow bringing that power of God life into the human expression, it is not true spirituality."

Indeed, St. Patrick's Lorica -- or "morning" prayer, also called a prayer of protection -- is a beautiful, well-known prayer attributed to him which articulates this very concept. Also called The Deer's Cry or I Awake Today it reads in part:

I arise today Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity, Through a belief in the Threeness, Through confession of the Oneness Of the Creator of creation.

I arise today through the strength of Heaven the rays of the sun, the radiance of the moon, the splendor of fire, the speed of lightening, the swiftness of the wind, the depth of the sea, the stability of the earth the firmness of rock.

May Christ shield me today against poison and fire, against drowning and wounding, so that I may fulfill my mission and bear fruit in abundance. Christ behind and before me, Christ behind and above me, Christ with me and in me, Christ around and about me, Christ on my right and on my left, Christ when I lie down at night, Christ when I rise in the morning, Christ in the heart of every man who think s of me, Christ in the mouth of everyone that speaks of me, Christ in every eye that sees me, Christ in every ear that hears me.

In conclusion then, "Celtic" Christianity -- though different in a variety of ways -- seems to differ from "Roman" Christianity primarily in the area of the believer's perspective of the world. For the Christian coming from a Roman perspective, the world is an enemy not to be trusted or tolerated. For a Celtic Christian, the world is a gift -- fallen like mankind -- but a gift nevertheless. Fickle and dangerous, the world may not be a friend at all times, but it is not THE enemy. Celtic Christians view the world as an exciting medium for evangelization, a planet created for our nourishment and habitation, and something to joyfully experience.

Leave it to the Irish to extract joy where they can find it!

For more fascinating information on Ireland, St. Patrick, and Celtic Christianity, visit the l ink below.

http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2259
More...
http://www.reformation.org/ireland.html

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GCF: Mess Cake

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe

If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! A smile will enhance the quality of your life. Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@egroups.com or visit the Good Clean Fun web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/ UNSUBSCRIBE INFO for Good Clean Fun is at the end of this email. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent.
--------------------------------------------

The Chaplain had been assigned to the ship and he noticed how much grief the cooks (Mess Specialists) caught from the crew and how they gave back as much as they got. He talked to the Food Service Officer and decided to talk to the cooks and get them to be more cheerful when they served the meals to the sailors coming down the line. A smile and a cheerful comment, a willingness to serve them will reap great benefits he told them.

After his pep talk the Food Service Officer and the Chaplain stood back and watched the food being served.

A new sailor aboard walked down the line but he didn't like anything he saw so he just carried his tray down the line till he got to the desert section. He picked up a saucer containing a large piece of chocolate cake.

The Mess Specialist looked at him, "Is that all you're gonna eat?" he asked.

The sailor said, "Yeah, the rest of it don't look too appetizing."

The Mess Specialist smiled and said, "Well, in that case would you like two pieces of cake?"

The Chaplain smiled and nudged the Food Service Officer in the ribs,
"I told you my talk did them some good."

The kid said, "Yeah, man, I'd appreciate it."

The cook leaned over and cut the piece of cake on the tray in half.
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Home Donations

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
--------------------------------------------

A tired homemaker opened the front door of her home to find a young minister from the neighborhood who said, "I'm collecting donations for the new children's home we're building. I hope you'll give what you can."

"To be sure," said the beleaguered woman, "I'll give you two boys, two girls, or one of each."
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Labor Pains

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
--------------------------------------------

When I was a mother's helper, the mom of the family I worked for sat with her three oldest children and watched a PBS special showing the birth of a baby. The mom thought it would be a good starting point for answering questions about the facts of life.

As her five-year-old studied the baby coming out of the birth canal, he asked, "Mom, does that hurt?"

"Oh, yes, it does," she said, remembering her difficult deliveries.

"Wow," he continued in awe, "does it hurt the mother too?"
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Wedding Ceremony

Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List) -Tom
Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website:
Subscribe
--------------------------------------------

A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service.

After the benediction, he had planned to call the couple down for a brief ceremony in front of the congregation.

For the life of him, he couldn't think of the names of those who were to be married.

"Will those wanting to get married please come to the front?" he requested.

Immediately, nine single ladies, three widows, four widowers, and six single men stepped to the front.
_ ____________________________ _

GCF: Nervous Witness

Emailed to me by a friend (Thanks, Howard) -Tom
--------------------------------------------

An uncertain and nervous witness was being cross-examined. The lawyer thundered, "Have you ever been married?"

"Yes, sir," said the witness in a low voice. "Once."

"Whom did you marry?"

"Well, a woman."

The lawyer bellowed angrily, "Of course you married a woman. Did you ever hear of anyone marrying a man?"

To which the witness replied meekly, "My sister did."
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / Never criticize a man \ \_/ ////
\ / until you've walked a mile \ /
\ _/ in his shoes. That way, if he \_ /
/ / doesn't like what you have to say, \ it'll be OK because you'll be a mile away
and you'll have his shoes.
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / The journey of a thousand miles \ /
\ _/ begins with a broken fan belt \_ /
/ / or a leaky tire. \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Veni, Vedi, Velcro \ /
\ _/ (I came, I saw, I stuck to it) \_ /
/ / \ (((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / Lecture: The art of \ \_/ ////
\ / transferring information from \ /
\ _/ the notes of the lecturer to the \_ /
/ /notes of the students without passing \ through the minds of either.
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / It's a shame that \ /
\ _/ stupidity isn't painful! \_ /
/ / \ _ ____________________________ _
/ ) Thomas S. Ellsworth ( / / tellswor@slonet.org \ _( (_ http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor _) )_
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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[GCFL.net] Wet Clothes

After her son fell into the pond yet again and came home with his good school clothes dripping wet, the exasperated mother sent him to his room and washed and dried his clothes.

A little later, she heard a commotion in the back yard and called out, "Are you out there wetting your pants again!?"

There was dead silence for a moment. Then a deep, masculine voice answered meekly, "No, ma'am, I'm just reading the meter."

Received from Steve Sanderson.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Donald MacDonald

I heard a story recently about a student named Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye (in Scotland) who was admitted into the prestigious Oxford University and was living in the hall of residence in his first year there. His clan was so excited that one of their own had made it into the upper class of education, but they were concerned how he would do in "that strange land." After the first month, his mother came to visit.

"And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked.

"Mother," he replied in his thick brogue, "they're such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head against the wall, and he won't stop. The one on the other side screams and screams and screams away into the night."

"Oh, Donald! How do you manage to put up with those awful noisy English neighbors?"

"Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here quietly, playing my bagpipes..."

Received from Tim Savage.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Punny Reading

"The Human Brain" by Sara Bellum

"Please Don't Hurt Me" by I. Bruce Easily

"Life Through the Eyes of a Drunk" by Al Coholic

"Thirty Yards to the Outhouse" by Will E. Makeit (illustrated by Betty Wont)

"The Proper Use of Sunscreens" by Justin Casey Burns

"How to Cure Scratching" by Ivan Awfulich

"Discount Alternatives" by Robin Stuff

"How to Save Time" by Terry A. While

Received from Cybersalt Digest.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Baseball Doctor

Thanks to everyone that donated during the donation drive! Once again it was a success. And now we start another six months of commercial-free good, clean funnies... */

As the manager of our hospital's softball team, I was responsible for returning equipment to the proper owners at the end of the season.

When I walked into the surgery department carrying a bat that belonged to one of the surgeons, I passed several patients and their families in a waiting area.

I heard one man say to his wife, "Look, honey, here comes your anesthesiologist."

Received from You Make Me Laugh.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
To print or email this funny to others, go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://www.gcfl.net/latest.php
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.

*Age Hat*

In a hat shop a saleslady gushed: "That's the hat for you! It makes you look ten years younger."

"Then I don't want it," retorted the customer.

"I certainly can't afford to put on ten years every time I take off my hat!"

(-:][:-)

*Seat Sacrifice*

On the way back to New York as I was sitting in the Phoenix airport, they announced that the flight to Vegas was full. The airline was looking for volunteers to give up their seats. In exchange, they'd give you a $100 voucher for your next flight and a first class seat in the plane leaving an hour later. About eight people ran up to the counter to take advantage of the offer.

About 15 seconds later all eight of those people sat down grumpily as the lady behind the ticket counter said,

"If there is anyone else OTHER than the flight crew who'd like to volunteer, please step forward..."

(-:][:-)

*Time Off*

Two factory workers were talking. "I know how to get some time off from work." said the man.

"How do you think you will do that?" said the other one. He proceeded to show her...by climbing up to the rafters, and hanging upside down.

The boss walked in, saw the worker hanging from the ceiling, and asked him what on earth he was doing? "I'm a light bulb" answered the guy.

"I think you need some time off," said the boss. So, the man jumped down and walked out of the factory. The second worker began walking out too. The boss asked her where did she think she was going?

"Home. I can't work in the dark."

(-:][:-)

*Fair Trial*

A judge enters the courtroom, strikes the gavel and says,

"Before I begin this trial, I have an announcement to make. The lawyer for the defense has paid me $15,000 to swing the case his way. The lawyer for the plaintiff has paid me $10,000 to swing the case her way. In order to make this a fair trial, I am returning $5,000 to the defense."

Eye Laugh

"Moose Doctor"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=1

"Cage Match"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=3

"Promise Keeper"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=4

"Signs of Control"
http://www.cybersalt.org/go.php?id=cw227

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/thoughtful.html - - Thoughtful Interview "For a job applicant, an interview is to be sought, then dreaded, then endured. And managers rarely relish interviews any more than the trembling supplicant on the other side of their desk. So it's probably just as well that people can't read minds. If they could..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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U.S. Government RSS Library - - http://www.firstgov.gov/Topics/Reference_Shelf/Libraries/RSS_Library.shtml - - This site provides access to government sites with RSS feeds. Topics include agriculture, business, education, health, international relations, and science. Also includes a link for downloading RSS readers. RSS has several meanings: Really Simple Syndication, Rich Site Summary, and RDF Site Summary, where RDF stands for Resource Data Framework. In any case, it's a method of summarizing the latest news and information from a website, that can be easily read by many news readers or news aggregators.
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Locked Down: Gangs in the Supermax - - http://americanradioworks.publicradio.org/features/prisongangs/index.html - - Twenty years ago, a new kind of prison was taking America by storm. The supermax prison was designed to incapacitate dangerous criminals by locking them down in stark isolation, sometimes for years on end. So have the supermaxes lived up to their promise of stopping violent criminals? At this American RadioWorks site, former gang members discuss gang affiliation and the stress of debriefing. Their stories offer a rare view inside the locked-down world of the supermax.
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History of Flight from Around the World - - http://www.aiaa.org/content.cfm?pageid=307 - - Many nations gave birth to aviation and the pioneers who propelled its stunning successes. To recognize these contributions, we asked the International Council of Aeronautical Sciences (ICAS) to have each ICAS country identify its pioneers and present the story of its national achievements in aerospace.
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Hurricane Digital Memory Bank: Preserving Stories from the 2005 Hurricane Season - - http://hurricanearchive.org/ - - Hurricane Digital Memory Bank: Preserving Stories from Katrina, Rita, and Wilma uses electronic media to collect, preserve, and present the stories, images, and responses of the devastating 2005 hurricane season.
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Exploring Space: The Quest for Life - - http://www.pbs.org/exploringspace/ - - Our galaxy alone contains hundreds of billions of stars, giving scientists a vast cosmic frontier to search. Could alien life be looking up at its own sky and asking, 'Is there life out there?' This PBS site helps you learn about the amazing quest for life that begins on Earth and extends into the heavens above.
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State Medicaid Benefits - - http://www.kff.org/medicaid/benefits/index.jsp - - This site contains Medicaid Benefits survey data from 2003 and 2004 with information about benefits covered, limits, co-payments and reimbursement methodologies for the 50 states, the District of Columbia and the Territories.
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AnnualReports.com - - http://www.annualreports.com/ - - This free service allows users to review an annual report in an easy and convenient manner. Boasting the most complete and up-to-date listings of annual reports on the internet, AnnualReports.com provides instant access to annual reports in their actual format in one single location. For educated investors, corporate annual reports are the most important research tool available. Annual Reports enable investors to stay up to date on a company's yearly outlook.
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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"Life is like a coin, you can spend it any way you want but only once."

May this encourage you always...

Don't spend major time with minor people. If there are people in your life that continually disappoint you, break promises, stomp on your dreams, too judgmental, have different values and don't have your back during difficult times...that is not a friend.

To have a friend, be a friend. Sometimes in life as you grow, your friends will either grow or go. Surround yourself with people who reflect similar values, goals, interests and lifestyle.

When I think of any of my successes, I am thankful to GOD from whom all blessings flow, and to my family and friends that enrich my life.

Over the years my phone book has changed because I changed for the better. At first you think you're going to be alone, but after a while new people show up in your life that make your life so much sweeter and easier to endure.

Remember what your elders used to say, "Birds of a feather flock together."

If you're an eagle, don't hang around chickens: Chickens Can't Fly!

I love the Lord and thank Him for all that He does in my life, therefore, I'm passing this on. Yes I do love Jesus. He is my source of existence and my Savior. He keeps me functioning each and every day. Without Him, I would be nothing!

Without Him, I am nothing. But with Him, I can do all things.

Phil 4:13 Be Positive - Be Progressive - Take the time to make a Positive difference in someone's life.

Walk by faith
Not by sight

~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Receive God's blessings and have a wonderful week!

Thanks to Trina Montgomery
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[Bug's NOTE: We were unable to verify this story but we like it.]

A University professor at a well known institution of higher learning challenged his students with this question. "Did God create everything that exists?"

A student bravely replied, "Yes he did!" "God created everything?"
The professor asked. "Yes sir, he certainly did," the student replied. The professor answered, "If God created everything; then God created evil. And, since evil exists, and according to the principal that our works define who we are, then we can assume God is evil."

The student became quiet and did not respond to the professor's hypothetical definition.. The professor, quite pleased with himself, boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was a myth.

Another student raised his hand and said, "May I ask you a question, professor?" "Of course", replied the professor.
The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?" "What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never been cold?"

The other students snickered at the young man's question.The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat.
Everybody or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-460 F) is the total absence of heat; and all matter becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we have no heat."

The student continued, "Professor, does darkness exist?"
The professor responded, "Of course it does."
The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact, we can use Newton's prism to break white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe what happens when there is no light present."
Finally the young man asked the professor, "Sir, does evil exist?"

Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course, as I have already said. We see it everyday. It is in the daily examples of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil. To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist, sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat, or the darkness that comes when there is no light."

The professor sat down.
The young man's name-Albert Einstein

Thanks to Ricky and Sarah Shepherd
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THE FINAL INSPECTION

The soldier stood and faced God,
Which must always come to pass.
He hoped his shoes were shining,
Just as brightly as his brass.
"Step forward now, you soldier,
How shall I deal with you ?
Have you alw! ays turned the other cheek ?
To My Church have you been true?"

The soldier squared his shoulders and said,
"No, Lord, I guess I ain't.
Because those of us who carry guns,
Can't always be a saint.

I've had to work most Sundays,
And at times my talk was tough.
And sometimes I've been violent,
Because the world is awfully rough.

But, I never took a penny,
That wasn't mine to keep...
Though I worked a lot of overtime,
When the bills got just too steep.

And I never passed a cry for help,
Though at times I shook with fear.
And sometimes, God, forgive me,
I've wept unmanly tears.

I know I don't deserve a place,
Among the people here.
They never wanted me around,
Except to calm their fears.

If you've a place for me here, Lord,
It needn't be so grand.
I never expected or had! too much,
But if you don't, I'll understand.

There was a silence all around the throne,
Where the saints had often trod.
As the soldier waited quietly,
For the judgment of his God.

"Step forward now, you soldier,
You've borne your burdens well.
Walk peacefully on Heaven's streets,
You've done your time in Hell."

~Author Unknown~

Thanks to Greg McDaniel
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verse of the day -- Harley Hudson

I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling, and my message and my preaching were not in persuasive words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, so that your faith would not rest on the wisdom of men, but on the power of God.

1 Co 2:3-5 (NASB95)

There are two reasons Paul came to the Corinthians in weakness. The first we discussed last time: Paul wanted the Gospel to speak for itself – he recognized that there is not “I” in “Gospel”. The second has more to do with the hearers.

Of course you recall that Paul’s introduction to the book quickly became a “rant” on sectarianism or divisions among the Corinthians. Some were saying, “I am of Paul. I am of Apollos …” Well, the topic is back. Paul came to the Corinthians in weakness for the Corinthian’s sake. He did not want them influenced by his style. He wanted them to respond to the Gospel because of the Gospel message. He didn’t want them influenced by flowery speech and worldly wisdom.

I’ve heard it too many times to believe that it doesn’t exist in any denominational background in the American church. When speaking to those of a Pentecostal background, some say they came to the Lord because of the ministry of this-or-that minister. Charismatics lean more towards those whose teaching emphasizes the supernatural. “I was saved because so-and-so prophesied over me.” Christian Church folk had their favorite evangelists as do the Baptists. The list could continue, but the point is made. We tend to be swayed because of the style or personality of individual preachers. All too often, those same folk seldom grow beyond the infantile spiritual stage. When the high-powered preacher is gone, they often founder in a quagmire of indifference and confusion. There is no spiritual depth, only a simple faith that has done little to bring transformation.

If this sounds a lot like someone you know, rest assured that the condition is not terminal … if that individual recognizes that salvation comes not from a dynamic preacher but Jesus Christ. I’m not talking about a “church” knowledge of this fact, but a “heart” knowledge. The first is seed planted in shallow soil. The second is planted in rich, deep topsoil. The first will quickly fade. The second will produce abundant fruit.

Paul wanted the Gospel to speak for itself “in demonstration of the Spirit and of power”. It is difficult for us to understand, but when the “I” is removed from the Gospel, ministry is enhanced. The Gospel can speak much louder when we simply act as a conduit rather than a translator. Sure, this is not an easy thing to grasp. We all must learn from Paul’s example. We must get out of the way and let the Holy Spirit minister in power for it is the Gospel’s power that produces solid, mature, reproducing believers who will spread the Good News from shore to shore and pole to pole.

Harley

-=+=-

Yet we do speak wisdom among those who are mature; a wisdom, however, not of this age nor of the rulers of this age, who are passing away; but we speak God’s wisdom in a mystery, the hidden wisdom which God predestined before the ages to our glory; the wisdom which none of the rulers of this age has understood; for if they had understood it they would not have crucified the Lord of glory; but just as it is written, “Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, And which have not entered the heart of man, All that God has prepared for those who love Him.”
1 Co 2:6-9 (NASB95)

It is interesting to watch where people seek wisdom. When I was a kid the catch-phrase was “Confucius say …” Now none of us believed in anything Confucius might say, but it was the “in thing” at that moment. What we didn’t realize was that there were those who really did care. They though someone that old and that oriental just had to be wise. A while later the in thing was the wise man on top of the mountain. The weary pilgrim would eventually crawl to that lofty place and ask his most important question. Usually it went something like this: “What is the meaning of life?” We didn’t really think there was a wise man on top of a mountain who had all of the answers, but there were those who did.

I used to think that science would produce all the answers to all the questions man could ever ask. Lofty scientists would eventually unravel all the mysteries of life and truly give us meaning for being. I still follow scientific news. In some ways science has fulfilled the promise of solving the mysteries, yet the more questions science answers, the more questions there are to be answered.

I recall a car owner’s manual from many years ago. (No, I’m not old enough to really remember it, but I read about it … and not on the internet!) The document actually said that automotive engineering had progressed so far and to such lofty heights that there would never be a car as advanced as that vehicle. The owner was promised the absence of obsolescence. If I recall correctly, that year was back in the ‘40s or ‘50s!

Confucius, oriental mysticism, science, engineering … all promised something that they could not provide. The reason is simple. Wisdom does not come from human systems. Wisdom comes from the One who created everything. Wisdom does not come from observation and education. Wisdom comes from a being that created thought.

It is true that most of us know this fact … at least in a “Sunday school” way. It is in our heads, but is it in our hearts? Are we trusting God to provide … or are we looking for a higher paying job? Are we seeking satisfaction in a relationship with Jesus … or are we desiring the next and best model of __________________? You fill in the blank.

I like the way Paul finishes today’s selection: Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, And which have not entered the heart of man, All that God has prepared for those who love Him. Do you want the absolute best? Are you willing to accept things that you can only imagine? Do you desire to see things that even the wildest visionaries have yet to dream? The formula to achieve all of this is simple: Love God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. Love him with every ounce of strength you have. Don’t limit Him with your ideas, but trust Him to fulfill His dreams for you.

-=+=-

For to us God revealed them through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches all things, even the depths of God. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God, which things we also speak, not in words taught by human wisdom, but in those taught by the Spirit, combining spiritual thoughts with spiritual words.
1 Co 2:10-13 (NASB95)

Let’s bring ourselves to home plate for a second. Paul, in this section of the letter, is informing us of the superiority of God’s wisdom over man’s wisdom. This is an important teaching because it lays the groundwork for all answers Paul will give to the Corinthian’s questions. Simply put, remember that God’s wisdom is superior to man’s wisdom. Paul will lay on the sarcasm again in a bit, and it is important to remember this lesson.

Now, Paul begins by telling us that no one knows the mind of God better than the Spirit of God. He tells us that the Spirit “searches all things, even the depths of God.” In case we find that hard to understand, Paul draws a word picture for us … and I will make it personal. Who on this planet knows Harley better that the spirit (the most inner and personal part) of Harley? Even Melanie, my best friend and wife, can’t claim to know more about me than I do. I know my shortcomings as well as my good points. I know what I think in the middle of the night … she doesn’t unless I tell her. I am the only one who can plumb the depths of my heart and find what is under the ugliest rock in the darkest recess of my being.

So it is with the Spirit of God. Only He can know the thoughts of God, for He is at the very heart of God. This is important because Paul is disclosing his source for the wisdom of God that he possesses and is available to us. We receive the wisdom of God through the Spirit of God.

With that in mind, let us think through a chronology of our spiritual growth. Sometime in the past we heard the Gospel proclaimed … and we eventually responded to it. That response involved asking Jesus to take over our lives and become our Lord. He graciously applied His blood to us and saved us from the sins of our past … and our present … and our future. According to Ephesians 1, the Holy Spirit was given to us at that time as a seal, earnest money, guaranteeing our place in the family of God, the Church. Since that time, we should have been learning what it means to be a child of the King. We should have learned, or are learning, that as a child of God we have all the rights and privileges that any child has.

Now, let’s ponder the Holy Spirit for a second. What is His role in our spiritual lives? Jesus calls Him a comforter. A better translation might tell us that He is our source of understanding, our source of Godly wisdom, because He speaks to us and teaches us. He is our tutor, our teacher. Paul had the same Spirit working in his life … and that Spirit spoke to and through him to bring the wisdom of God to bear upon all aspects of his life … and the lives of those to whom Paul preached. That would include the Corinthians and, by extension, you and me.

Whew! That was a long way around the mulberry bush to come to this statement. Paul’s wisdom, and our wisdom, is not of this world. It is given to us by the Spirit of God who knows the heart of God and shares it all with us!

-=+=-

But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. But he who is spiritual appraises all things, yet he himself is appraised by no one. For who has known the mind of the Lord, that he will instruct Him? But we have the mind of Christ.

1 Co 2:14-16 (NASB95)

Have you ever tried to talk to someone who does not speak English? The conversation usually goes something like this:

“I want a doughnut.”
Unintelligible reply.
“I said,” you repeat very slowly, “I want a doughnut.”
Unintelligible reply.
“Read my lips,” you say with a bit of irritation. “I want a doughnut.”
Unintelligible reply.
“Hey!” you raise your voice as though the person is deaf. “I SAID I WANT A D-O-U-G-H-N-U-T!!!!”
Unintelligible reply.
“Oh, forget it. I’ll find something somewhere else!” And you storm out the door.

That is exactly how a spiritual conversation with a world-loving, non-believing man. He simply cannot understand what you are saying. Even if you translate “church” language into the common vernacular, he is still incapable of putting “Cross” and “Jesus” and “salvation” into a meaningful sentence. He doesn’t accept the things you say because you are an idiot … at least in his mind. The wisdom you have simply eludes comprehension. Paul says they are “spiritually appraised” … whatever that means.

OK. We’ll discuss “spiritually appraised”. First, note that the pronoun “they” appears before the phrase. What does “they” refer to? All pronouns must have an antecedent. Since we are talking about the spiritual man, it could be him … except the spiritual man is singular and referred to as “he” and “him”. So, what else is there in these verses that could be plural? Ah, there it is: “things of the spirit.” The things of the spirit are those things that are spiritually appraised. “Appraised” means compared, or judged, or explained. So, “they are spiritually appraised” means that the things of the spirit are impossible for the natural man to comprehend because these things are spiritual and he is not. He is speaking a foreign language and you are speaking English!

Paul tells us that the spiritual man judges, appraises, compares all things. That means that he looks at everything through “spiritual glasses”. He looks at a sunset and sees the beauty of God. He looks at a microscopic creature and sees the wondrous creative power of God. He watches scientists come up with conflicting conclusions and is simply amazed that these dudes cannot see that God created the microscopic and the complex. They didn’t “evolve”; they were created unique by a power greater than any single or group of men.

Where did the spiritual man get this ability? He has the mind of Christ. Before you get confused, Paul quotes from Isaiah 40:13 when he says: For who has known the mind of the Lord, that he will instruct Him? Isaiah says that no one has the mind of Christ … and that was true in Isaiah’s day, but, Paul tells us, we have the mind of Christ. We certainly CAN understand the things of God!

-=+=-

Harley

c. 2006 Harley E. Hudson

If you received Verse of the Day as a forward and you wish to have your own subscription, simply send an e-mail to hhudson719@sbcglobal.net and request a free subscription.
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 11, Number 44 --- 16 March 2006
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TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Sudoku / PBJ Time

Howdy, y'all, and greetings once again from deep behind the orange curtain in beautiful Irvine, California, where we haven't had an incident of a swagman stealing a jumpbuck and hiding it in his tucker bag for at least three weeks.

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Newsweek Sudoku
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Sudoku is the abbreviation of the Japanese phrase "suuji wa dokushin ni kagiru" which, depending on translation, means either

"The digits must remain single"
or
"In jail we had to be in this dumb kabuki play about the Forty- seven Ronin, and I wanted to be Yoshi, but they made me Ori!"

Homer Simpson quotes aside, Sudoku is a wildly popular and challenging logic puzzle You've probably seen it in your local newspaper. In Sudoku,

you are given a 9x9 grid. Some of the grid squares already contain numbers -- you cannot change these. To work the puzzle, fill in the empty squares of the grid with the numerals 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8, and 9.

The puzzle is solved when each ROW, each COLUMN, and each 3x3 square within the puzzle contain the numerals 1 through 9 with each numeral appearing once. The 3x3 squares are differentiated by shading. [Source: Newsweek Sudoku Help]

You already knew that, didn't you? Well, what you may not know is that our friends at Newsweek magazine, with the help of uclick, have a free web page that lets you play Sudoku online:

http://www.uclick.com/client/nwk/nwdoc/

Three Sudoku puzzles are available every day. (1) The normal 9x9 puzzle we all know and love; (2) A smaller 6x6 mini puzzle. This is a great place to start if you've never played Sudoku before; (3) A massive 16x16 puzzle that uses both numbers and letters. This is not for the faint of heart.

Newsweek's Sudoku puzzles also offer both a cheat and a bug. The cheat is that if you click in an empty square and then press the spacebar on your keyboard, Newsweek will automatically show you the entries which are possible for each square. This makes the puzzles MUCH easier, although the "hints" in the mega puzzles are so small they're almost illegible.

As for the bug, the first time you complete a row, column, or square, the game will display an "About the Lights" pop-up box. At the bottom of the box are the words "Don't show this message the next time I play this game" but [at least on my computer] there is no checkbox. Well, there is a check box, it's just invisible. Move your pointer to the left of the "Don't show this..." sentence and, if you're lucky, your pointer will change into a finger. Click your mouse, and then close the pop-up window. Problem solved.

If you are addicted to Sudoku, or if you have never played it and want to see what everyone is talking about, hop on over to Newsweek's free Sudoku page and watch the hours slowly disappear from your life. :)

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Info for Web Designers
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[Warning: This next part is kind of advanced stuff. Please accept my apologies in advance.]

If you create web pages that display active content such as embedded QuickTime movies, RealPlayer movies, Java Applets, or Flash, Shockwave, or Authorware players, check out

http://www.macromedia.com/devnet/activecontent/

In their February 26-ish Windows/Microsoft Update, our friends in Redmond fundamentally changed the way Internet Explorer handles embedded, active content. From here forward, "Active content that is embedded in HTML pages in certain ways will not be able to receive user input (for example, keyboard or mouse events) until the user clicks to either activate or continue loading the control." You can find a short Breeze presentation on this topic, and a possible fix [a js "design around" solution], at

http://adobe.breezecentral.com/activecontent022606/

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Meme Review: Peanut Butter Jelly Time
-------------------------------------

I want to spend some time over the next couple of months re-introducing you to different internet phenomena, the stuff that was once really, really popular and then quickly fell out of favor. Think of this as an internet pop culture history tour. Today's stop is at

http://home.comcast.net/~etrata/flash/banana.swf

This is what happens when you throw together an old Buckwheat Boys song, a copy of Macromedia Flash, and way too much free time.

Have a safe and happy week, and we'll talk again soon.

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==
The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238 Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Activities and Events of Interest
~~~
Investing for Retirement Class at SAU - Tuesday, April 4
Dr. David Ashby, the Peoples Bank Professor of Economics at SAU, will advise people about investing for retirement. This course will cover the basics of retirement planning from calculating how much is needed, to what type of accounts to use, to where to invest the money. Participants will learn how to save income taxes while saving for retirement. The class will also look at how mutual funds can simplify the whole process.
This class will be offered from 6 to 8 p.m. on Tuesday, April 4, in Business 205.
There is no charge to participate in this course.
~~~
Albemarle Steak and Bingo Supper - April 22, 2006
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Lance Cpl. Bunny Long, 22, of Modesto, Calif., died March 10 from a suicide, vehicle-borne, improvised explosive device in Al Anbar province, Iraq. He was assigned to Headquarters Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

02. Lance Cpl. Nicholas R. Anderson, 21, of Sauk City, Wis., died March 13 in a non-hostile vehicle accident in Afghanistan. He was assigned to the 1st Battalion, 3rd Marine Regiment, 3rd Marine Division, III Marine Expeditionary Force, Kaneohe Bay, Hawaii.

03. Lance Cpl. Kristen K. Figueroa, 20, of Honolulu, Hawaii, died March 12 while conducting combat operations in Al Anbar province, Iraq. He was assigned to 3rd Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

The Department of Defense announced the death of four soldiers who were supporting Operation Enduring Freedom. They died west of Asadabad, Afghanistan, on March 12, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their HMMWV during combat operations. Killed were:
04. Staff Sgt. Joseph, R. Ray, 29, of Asheville, N.C. Ray was assigned to the Army Reserve's 391st Engineer Battalion, Asheville, N.C.
05. Sgt. Kevin D. Akins, 29, of Burnsville, N.C. Akins was assigned to the Army Reserve's 391st Engineer Battalion, Asheville, N.C.
06. Sgt. Anton J. Hiett, 25, of Mount Airy, N.C. Hiett was assigned to the Army Reserve's 391st Engineer Battalion, Greenville, S.C.
07. Spc. Joshua L. Hill, 24, of Fairmount, Ind. Hill was assigned to the Army Reserve's 391st Engineer Battalion, Asheville, N.C.

08. Staff Sgt. Bryan A. Lewis, 32, of Bunkie, La., died north of Rustamiyah, Iraq, on March 13, when an improvised device detonated near his HMMWV during a convoy operations. Lewis was assigned to the 519th Military Police Battalion, 49th Military Police Brigade, Fort Polk La.

09. Pfc. Angelo A. Zawaydeh, 19, of San Bruno, Calif., died in Baghdad, Iraq on March 15, when his traffic control point came under mortar attack during combat operations. Zawaydeh was assigned to the Army's 2nd Battalion, 502nd Infantry, 2nd Brigade, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.

The Department of Defense announced the death of two soldiers who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom. They died near Ar Ramadi, Iraq on March 13, when they came under small arms fire and an improvised explosive device detonated during combat operations. Killed were:
10. Staff Sgt. Marco, A. Silva, 27, of Alva, Fla. Silva was assigned to the Army's 1st Battalion, 506th Infantry, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.
11. Sgt. Corey A. Dan, 22, of Norway, Maine. Dan was assigned the Army's 1st Battalion, 506th Infantry, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault), Fort Campbell, Ky.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
It’s never too early to start making my Anniversary Present list. (Well, I did get a new medicine bag for my birthday.)
Rechargeable Batteries for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (9.6 volts, 600 mAh battery, 2 each (for our two radios)), Yaesu FT-50 (it takes a FNB-83 7.2V1400mAh battery), Yaesu, VX-1 (it takes a FNB-52LI 3.6V 700mAh Lithium-Ion battery).
New “Rubber Ducky” antennas for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (two radios)
Anything from Larry Norman
Back Scratcher
Basic tools of any kind
Batteries, 9 volt
Batteries, AAA
Blankets or Quilts
Book, “The Good Life: Seeking Purpose, Meaning, and Truth in Your Life” by Charles Colson
“Boot” Horn
Chair, office $49 from SAMS (5 of them)
Cheese Grater
Cordless Drill
Cordless Screwdriver
A DeLorme Earthmate GPS LT-20 device
A copy of DeLorme Street Atlas USA 2006 Plus
A copy of DeLorme Topo USA 5.0
Digital Video Recorder (Pioneer DVR-533H-S $333 at Beach Camera)
Eyeglasses, “Computer type” to use at church (and some new ones to use at home and at work.)
Floor Mats (for the truck)
A new “Gitter”
Handkerchiefs
Hasselblad H2D-39 Digital Professional Camera
Hat (warm, for bald guys winter wear.)
Magnifying Glass.
New Showerhead
Non skid toilet rug
Refrigerator Thermometer
Small, lightweight “head light” so I can see small things on the desk or work bench.
Some Warmup Suits to wear around the house after we get that first gas bill.
Trackball for the home computer
VHS - DVD Recorder (Lite-On LVC-9006 $219 @ Buy.com)
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Scheduled Activities
~~~
Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
~~~
Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
~~~
"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
~~~
MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
~~~
MCC - Early Morning Prayer - Monday - Friday, From 6:30 am to 8:00 am
~~~
MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
~~~
MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
~~~
MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
~~~
MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
~~~
MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
~~~
MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
~~~
MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
~~~
Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
~~~
TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Isa 43:11-13 2 Cor 5:21 Rom 9:20-21 Heb 12:25-27 Lam 3:19-26 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E-mail at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. For the "Blog" version just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com/ to see the latest issue.
Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat". If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. Of course "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com to see the latest issue (usually updated sometime Friday evening or Saturday morning.

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Can I Help?

2006-03-12T06:33:00.000-08:00

Volume 8, Issue 10 - - Friday, March 10, 2006

Hello ALL,

The "Friends For Pat Antoon Benefit" Steak Dinner and Entertainment was a HUGE success this evening. A sold out crowd, great food, entertainment and good folks to boot. It was a pleasure to see so many friends come out for Pat. Annette really appreciated seeing so many of our retired Albemarle friends.
Pat’s friends worked hard to sell tickets, cook and prepare the armory. Walter Hale, Jerry Barr and the MCC musicians and singers provided entertainment. The only thing lacking was a favorable ruling from the judge in Dallas and that’s still a possibility.
~~~~~
Joe Tudor wrote to comment; “This past weekend I stayed in a Marriott hotel, and read the foreword to J.W. Marriott's book "The Spirit to Serve" (it's in every room, right next to the Bible and the Book of Mormon). Jim Collins made a great observation about change and improvement. As you read this, think not only about change in the workplace, but change in society and in your own life.
====================
The "fundamental attributes of successful companies" include:
"Timeless core values and enduring purpose
A relentless drive for progress
Strength beyond the prescience of any one individual
"The key to prospering and adapting in the coming decades amongst an ever-escalating rate of change is to first be clear about and resolutely dedicated to what you stand for and why that should never change. You must then be just as resolutely willing to change absolutely everything else."
====================
While staying in the Fairview Park Marriott in Falls Church, VA, I took the Metro down to stroll along the National Mall, look inside the Air and Space Museum, the National Museum of American History, and stroll past the Capitol Building and the Washington Monument. We also took a few minutes to peek in on the National Archives at the Declaration of Independence and Constitution. I simply cannot understand how anyone doesn't see that (a) God is and has been at work in this country, and (b) our Founding Fathers knew that, and intended for us to keep that message alive.”

Thanks Joe, we needed that.
~~~~~
Magnolia lost a “squeaker” at the state basketball tournament today. I believe the final score was something like 47 to 44. So our team came in second for the state championship. Still not to shabby.
~~~~~
The photos on the front of this weeks “Bleat” include Roy and Loretta Specie, organizers of the Pat Antoon Benefit, Victoria Bocan one of the Benefit servers, four of the Benefit cooks, Ricky Jurls, Michael Baucum, Chance Thornton, and Gary Carter, and also a shot of Pat and Mandy Antoon, there expressing their thanks to everyone.
~~~~~
I guess our new DVD player “spooked” our old one. It gave up the ghost this week so I took it back to Wal-Mart and brought back our sixth DVD player. I promise we’re not treating them harshly, just high usage.
~~~~~
Now the only problem is that our “kitchen” DVD player (the one we won) didn’t come with “TV Guardian.” (http://tvguardian.com/gshell.php) Not a big problem, we just have to be careful to only play “G” rated DVDs in the kitchen.
I can’t express enough how much I enjoy watching movies without the offensive language they seem determined to throw in them these days. If you’re considering purchase of a TV or DVD player, consider getting one equipped with TV guardian. It’s surprising how much more we enjoy our entertainment now.
~~~~~
Don’t forget to check out www.mcc2000.net
~~~~~
Our Friend Kathy Cheatham shared these with us.

Good One Liners!

Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
Don't let your worries get the best of you ... remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
It is easier to preach ten sermons, than it is to live one.
The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.
People are funny ... they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
Quit griping about your church ... if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
Some minds are like concrete...thoroughly mixed up and permanently set. Amen
Peace starts with a smile.
I don't know why some people change churches...what difference does it make which one you stay home from? This is good!
A lot of church members who are singing "Standing on the Promises" are just sitting on the premises.
We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them.
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
God doesn't call the qualified ... He qualifies the called.
God grades on the cross, not the curve.
God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts."
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
He who angers you ... controls you.
If God is your Co-pilot ... swap seats.
Don't give God instructions ... just report for duty.
The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
We don't change the message ... the message changes us.
You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.
''The Love of God is like the ocean, you can see it’s beginning, but not it’s ending.''
''We can't change the wind, but we can adjust our sails.''
~~~~~
I got to use my new FEMA radio for the first time today. Larry Taylor was in the country near Bussey while I fought problems between Emerson and Magnolia. I hate to admit it but the radios worked great. Communications was crystal clear.
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com. Older issues can be found at bugsbleat.blogspot.com, bugsbleatnew.blogspot.com, and bugsbleat4q.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
www.aaa.com Regular
Current Avg. $ 2.35
http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - We’re sharing recipes from Shannon Voigt’s new Taylor Recipe Book
Monte Cristo Sandwich - - Annette McClellan

Ingredients:
3 slices white bread
Mayonnaise, as needed
2 slices Gouda
2 slices turkey
3 large eggs, beaten
¼ cup milk
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 tablespoon unsalted butter
Strawberry slices, for garnish
Orange wedges, for garnish
Serving suggestion: Blackberry jam

Method:
On a work surface, lay out 2 slices of bread and spread with mayonnaise. Top each slice with the 1 slice of Gouda and 1 slice of turkey each. Put the third slice of bread on top of one stack, and flip the remaining stack on top, cheese-side down, to make a triple-decker sandwich. Using a knife, cut the crusts off the sandwich (this helps to pinch and seal the ends). Wrap the sandwich tightly with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes and up to 6 hours. (Wrapping the sandwich in plastic wrap, compacts it, and prevents the egg batter from seeping in.) Combine the eggs and milk in a bowl. Heat the oil and butter in a skillet over medium-high heat. Unwrap the sandwich and dip it in the egg batter, to coat evenly. Gently place it in the skillet, and fry, turning once, until golden brown and hot, about 5 minutes total. Cut the Monte Cristo in ½, transfer it to a plate, and garnish with the strawberry and orange. Spoon some jam over each ½ and serve immediately.
Notes: Recipe courtesy Mama's on Washington Square, San Francisco, CA
~~~~~
BreakPoint
With Chuck Colson

Have You No Shame?
The Sorry State of Politics Today
March 10, 2006

If you read a major national newspaper this week, you may have seen the screaming full-page ad beginning with this headline: “These Religious Leaders Have a Serious Gambling Problem . . . ” The ad, which also runs on television, pictures Ralph Reed, formerly with the Christian Coalition, Rev. Lou Sheldon from the Traditional Values Coalition, and Jim Dobson of Focus on the Family with a sinister photo of Jack Abramoff. Talk about guilt by association.

I was called the Nixon “hatchet man,” so I ought to know a “hatchet job” when I see one, though I am not sure that I have ever seen anything quite this vicious since the McCarthy era.

The facts are these: Jim Dobson had nothing to do with the Indian tribes or Abramoff. The allegations in the attack are without any basis in fact. Jim has fought gambling in forty-three states. This is nothing less than libel.

The attack on these Christians is sponsored by a group called Defcon. Its website lists the people, a Who’s Who of the extreme left, including same-sex “marriage” and pro-abortion activists, liberal professors, and ACLU luminaries. And they have the nerve to say that Dobson, Reed, and Sheldon have “waged war against our Constitution.”

While battling such horrors as stem-cell research, the ad says, “all the time they must have been betting that they would not get caught taking their thirty pieces of silver and selling out the millions who believed them. [But] they were wrong.”

Well, whoever is bankrolling Defcon will soon discover that sensible people do not react kindly to this kind of vicious smear and guilt by association.

But there are two lessons here. First, there is no way in today’s polarized environment that you can boldly oppose evil without being viciously attacked—even if you speak gently, lovingly, and winsomely. Attacks, I guess, mean that we are having an impact.

The second lesson is a bigger one. In the Internet age anybody can create a front group, and no one has to disclose where the money is coming from. A full-page ad in the New York Times costs about $168,000. Did the people listed on the Defcon website pay for the ad? If not, who did? Non-profit groups file with the IRS, and anybody can find out who funds them. But you can create a phantom group on the Internet and smear people with impunity. This is wrong.

And it goes over the top. If he were alive today, I think Sen. McCarthy would look at this and be embarrassed. Defcon gives McCarthyism a bad name.

With McCarthy the nation’s conscience finally kicked in. Joe Welsh, the legendary council for the Army, famously asked him, “Have you no sense of decency, sir . . . ?” That galvanized decent Americans, and the tide shifted as the press began condemning McCarthy’s vicious tactics. They were rightly outraged, and McCarthy was censured by the Senate. Where is the press outrage today?

Now, this is not a time for Christians to strike back in anger. But we ought to be calling people to moral indignation. And we ought to remember that when we fight evil, we will be attacked by unprincipled people. Take it in stride. As my friend Richard Neuhaus said some years ago, “Undaunted, we are enlisted for the duration bearing witness to the truth.”

For further reading and information:
BreakPoint offer: Subscribe today to BreakPoint WorldView magazine! Call 1-877-322-5527.

See Defcon’s website to learn more about the group. View Defcon’s ad against James Dobson, Ralph Reed, and Lou Sheldon. (Adobe Acrobat Reader required.)

Steve Jordahl, “Opponents Try to Tie Dobson to Abramoff,” Family News in Focus, 9 March 2006.

“Group Targets Dobson for Alleged Ties to Lobbyist,” Associated Press, 8 March 2006.

Max Blumenthal, “Abramoff Splits the Christian Right,” Yahoo! News, 7 March 2006.

Mike Soraghan, “Liberal Group Targets Dobson,” Denver Post, 7 March 2006.

M. E. Sprengelmeyer and Jean Torkelson, “Group Targets Focus Founder,” Rocky Mountain News, 8 March 2006.

BreakPoint Commentary No. 060113, “Revolution to Revulsion: Ambidextrous Corruption.”

The BreakPoint Web site and BreakPoint WorldView Magazine feature Colson’s commentaries as well as feature articles by other established and up-and-coming writers to equip readers with a biblical perspective on a variety of issues and topics.
© 2004 Prison Fellowship.
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
simulacrum: a representation; an insubstantial or vague semblance.
toothsome: delicious; attractive; luscious.
countermand: to revoke (a former command) or recall by a contrary order.
expropriate: to deprive of possession; also, to transfer (property) to oneself.
perambulate: to stroll; to walk through or over.
contradistinction: distinction by contrast.
ululate: to howl; to wail.
from Dictionary.Com
~~~~~
"Before you can do something you must first be something." - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

"The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions." - Alfred Adler

"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"But words are things, and a small drop of ink, falling like dew upon a thought, produces that which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think." - Lord Byron

"Silence is one of the great arts of conversation." - Cicero

"Good judgment comes from experience, and experience - well, that comes from poor judgment." - A.A. Milne

"The world of books is the most remarkable creation of man. Nothing else that he builds ever lasts." - Clarence Shepard Day

"The reward of a thing well done, is to have done it." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped." - Elbert Green Hubbard (1856-1915) American Writer, Printer, Businessman
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

Atheist Offers Chance to Evangelize Him on eBay
Suzanne Sataline/Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 10, 2006)
In an example of how evangelistic opportunities pop up in the strangest places, 23-year-old DePaul University graduate student Hemant Mehta, in an eBay ad, promised the winner that for each $10 of the final bid, he would attend an hour of church services. Although he was raised in Jainism and is now an atheist, Mehta "suspects" he may be missing out on something.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2231

New Detailed Digital Photo Renews Investigation into Noah's Ark
Joe Kovaks/Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 10, 2006)
WorldNetDaily reports that a new, high-resolution digital image of what has become known as the "Ararat Anomaly" is reigniting interest in the hunt for Noah's Ark.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2227

Canadian Artist Publicly Dedicates Art to Jesus -- Causes National Stir When Forced to Remove Sign
Peter Biggs/Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 9, 2006)
Vi Tunstall, an artist from British Columbia, made news when she posted a sign expressing her thankfulness to God along with her exhibition of art at South Delta Public Library.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2223

Independent, NON-Religious MSNBC/ZOGBY Poll Says Hollywood is Not in Touch With Mainstream Values
News Staff / Teresa Neuman n Reporting (Mar 8, 2006)
The results of a recent MSNBC.com/Zogby International poll show that movie fans believe Hollywood's values are not in line with the rest of America. The survey polled more than 17,000 people in the week leading up to the Academy Awards.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2219

Senator Brownback Seeks to Keep Broadcast Indecency Bill "Pure" and Simple, So It Will Pass
News Staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 7, 2006)
Current fines are "so small that they hardly serve as a deterrent for broadcasters."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2215

Prime Minister Tony Blair Reveals His Dependence on God's Guidance in Interview
Teresa Neumann Reporting (Mar 6, 2006)
"That decision has to be taken and has to be lived with, and in the end there is a judgment that -- well, I think if you have faith about these things then you realize that judgment is made by other people," said Blair.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2211

South Dakota Does It! Governor Mike Rounds Signed Legislation Today Banning Nearly All Abortions
AP Staff /Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 6, 2006)
The law is scheduled to take effect on July 1st, 2006.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2210

Celebration 2006 - Churches Working Together to Transform Canada, One Neighbor at a Time
Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 3, 2006)
"I can just imagine God looking down on our days, smiling from ear to ear in tears of joy as his children all played and worked side-by-side with one another, in His name."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2206

Nevada May Consider Constitutional Amendment to Inform Students that Evolution is a Theory with "Many unanswered questions"
News Staff / Aimee Herd reporting (Mar 3, 2006)
"All I'm saying is you've got to tell the truth about evolution."
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=2202
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GCF: Can I Help?

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Found at The Daily Joke Page (50plus.com)
http://en.50plus.com/display.cfm?cabinetID=353&libraryID=98&documentID=5221
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One summer evening a young son came in while his parents were setting the table for supper. Quite surprisingly, he asked if he could help.

His mother said, "No, but I appreciate you asking."

The child responded, "Well, I appreciate you saying no."

(-:][:-)

Hashing It Out

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Emailed to me from another humor list (You Make Me Laugh) To subscribe to You Make Me Laugh, send a blank email to:
SUBSCRIBE-laugh@lists.crosswalk.com
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I was working as a short-order cook at two restaurants in the same neighborhood. On a Saturday night, I was finishing up the dinner shift at one restaurant and hurrying to report to work at the second place, but I was delayed because one table kept sending back an order of hash browns, insisting they were cold. I replaced them several times, but still the customers were dissatisfied.

When I was able to leave, I raced out the door and arrived at my second job. A server immediately handed me my first order.

"Make sure these hash browns are hot," she said, "because these people just left a restaurant down the street that kept serving them cold ones."

(-:][:-)

Stained Glass

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Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List)
Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
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An minister tells of his first Sunday in a new parish and of presenting the children's message. It seems the sanctuary in the new church had some magnificent stained glass windows, so his message centered on how each of us is called to help make up the whole picture of life (the life of the community of the faithful). Like the pictures in the windows, it takes many little panels of glass to make the whole picture.

And then he said, "You see each one of you is a little pane." And then pointing to each child, "You're a little pane. And you're a little pane. And you're a little pane. And..."

It took a few moments before he realized why everyone was laughing so hard.

(-:][:-)

We Must Stop This Immediately!

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Emailed to me from another humor list (Humor_G)
To subscribe to Humor_G, send a blank email to:
Humor_G-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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Have you noticed that Stairs are getting steeper. Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!

And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own refection.........Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them.. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the waist, hips, thighs, and bosom?

The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually "believe" the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling?

I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in here!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.

(-:][:-)

Yard Sale

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Emailed to me another humor list (Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List)
Subscribe to Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh list at the website: Subscribe
--------------------------------------

A woman was taking her time browsing through everything at a friend's yard sale, and said to her, "My husband is going to be very angry I stopped at a yard sale."

"I'm sure he'll understand when you tell him about all the bargains you found," her friend replied.

"Normally, yes," she said. "But he just broke his leg, and he's waiting for me to take him to the hospital to have it set."
_ ____________________________ _

Comments, suggestions, flames, etc.
tellswor@slonet.org
(((\ \>_/ )___________________( \_ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / I haven't been feeling so great.\ /
\ _/ I swallowed a door knob, \_ /
/ / and it keeps turning my stomach. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / The person who knows everything \ /
\ _/ has the most to learn. \_ /
/ / \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Compromise: \ /
\ _/ The art of dividing a cake \_ /
/ / in such a way that everybody \ believes he got the biggest piece.

\\\\ \_/ / It is unfortunate that, as we \ \_/ ////
\ / grow up, nature robs us of the \ /
\ _/ knowledge of what youngsters are \_ /
/ / always giggling about. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / To get maximum attention, \ /
\ _/ just make a great \_ /
/ / big mistake. \
\\\\ \_/ / The older you get, the tougher\ \_/ ////
\ / it is to lose weight, because \ /
\ _/ by then your body and your fat \_ /
/ / are really good friends. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / To live forever, \ /
\ _/ acquire a chronic disease \_ /
/ / and take care of it. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Any man who laughs at women's \ /
\ _/ clothes has never paid \_ /
/ / the bill for them. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Work like you don't need the \ /
\ _/ money. Love like you've never been\_ /
/ / hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. \ \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / How come SUPERMAN could stop \ /
\ _/bullets with his chest, but always \_ /
/ /ducked when someone threw a gun at him?\
\\\\ \_/ / If you have your finger \ \_/ ////
\ / touching the rearview mirror \ /
\ _/ that says -- "objects in mirror \_ /
/ / are closer than they appear", \ how can that be possible?
_ ____________________________ _
/ ) Thomas S. Ellsworth ( / / tellswor@slonet.org \ _( (_ http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor _) )_
(((\ \>_/ )_______________________( \_Stop for a visit, leave with a smile! To join Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.Com To leave Good Clean Fun, email: good-clean-fun-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.Com Or visit the Good Clean Fun web site at http://www. slonet.org/~tellswor/
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[GCFL.net] Family Driving

My husband had been the only driver in the family for many years. I can't drive and usually prefer to sit in the back of the family car behind the front passenger seat. Our elder boy would take the front seat and the younger boy sat in the back with me.

When our elder son got his driver's license, his father was very happy because he wanted to relax as a passenger for a change.

On the day our elder son got to drive for the first time, there was a change in the seating position. My husband decided he wanted to sit in the back with me, so our younger boy went to the front.

As we were leaving the parking lot, our younger boy cheered, "Yeeeaaahh...! We children have taken over the car!" He then turned around, looked at us, and said with mock severity, "Now, the two of you behave yourselves in the back." He paused for a few seconds before adding, "Remember now, no hanky panky!"

Received from Anonymous.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Learning Numbers

The teacher asked one of her young students if he knew his numbers.

"Yes," he said. "I do. My father taught me."

"Good. What comes after three."

"Four," answers the boy.

"What comes after six?"

"Seven."

"Very good," says the teacher. "Your dad did a good job.
What comes after ten?"

"A jack," says the little boy.

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Encouraging Words

My little boy sometimes had difficult bowel movements. One day, we were browsing together in a novelty and gift store. There were many wooden signs of "words of encouragement" hanging on display.

Suddenly, he pointed to one of the signs and said to me, "Mum, I think we should get this one and hang it in the toilet." I looked at the sign he was indicating.

It read:

P. U. S. H.

"Pray Until Something Happens."

Received from Anonymous.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Eye Test

A Polish immigrant goes to the Wisconsin Department of Motor Vehicles in Milwaukee to apply for a driver's license and is told he has to take an eye test. The examiner shows him a card with the letters:

C Z J W I X N O S T A C Z

"Can you read this?" the examiner asks.

"Read it?" the Polish guy replies, "I know the guy!!"

Received from Paula.

(-:][:-)

[GCFL.net] Children's Laws

Donation Drive (2 days left)
Do you enjoy GCFL? If so, please consider a small donation
to help keep things running. Please visit
http://www.gcfl.net/donate.php for details.

Laws Concerning Food and Drink
Household Principles
Lamentations of the Father
by Ian Frazier

*Laws of Forbidden Places*

Of the beasts of the field, and of the fishes of the sea, and of all foods that are acceptable in my sight you may eat, but not in the living room.

Of the hoofed animals, broiled or ground into burgers, you may eat, but not in the living room.

Of the cereal grains, of the corn and of the wheat and of the oats, and of all the cereals that are of bright color and unknown provenance you may eat, but not in the living room.

Of quiescently frozen dessert and of all frozen after-meal treats you may eat, but absolutely not in the living room. Of the juices and other beverages, yes, even of those in sippy-cups, you may drink, but not in the living room, neither may you carry such therein.

Indeed, when you reach the place where the living room carpet begins, of any food or beverage therein you may not eat, neither may you drink.

But if you are sick, and are lying down and watching something, then may you eat in the living room.

*Laws When at Table*

And if you are seated in your high chair, or in a chair such as a greater person might use, keep your legs and feet below you as they were.

Neither raise up your knees, nor place your feet upon the table, for that is an abomination to me.

Yes, even when you have an interesting bandage to show, your feet upon the table are an abomination, and worthy of rebuke.

Drink your milk as it is given you, neither use on it any utensils, nor fork, nor knife, nor spoon, for that is not what they are for; if you will dip your blocks in the milk, and lick it off, you will be sent away from my presence.

When you have drunk, let the empty cup then remain upon the table, and do not bite it upon its edge and by your teeth hold it to your face in order to make noises in it sounding like a duck: for you will be sent away from my presence.

When you chew your food, keep your mouth closed until you have swallowed, and do not open it to show your brother or your sister what is within; verily I say to you, do not so, even if your brother or your sister has done the same before you.

Eat your food only; do not eat that which is not food; neither seize the table between your jaws, nor use the raiment of the table to wipe your lips. I say again to you, do not touch it, but leave it as it is.

And though your stick of carrot does indeed resemble a marker, draw not with it upon the table, even in pretend, because we do not do that, that is why.

And though the pieces of broccoli are very like small trees, do not stand them upright to make a forest, because we do not do that, that is why.

Sit just as I have told you, and do not lean to one side or the other, nor slide down until you are nearly slid away.

Heed me; for if you sit like that, your hair will go into the syrup.

And now behold.....even as I have said, it has come to pass.

*Laws Pertaining to Dessert*

For as we judge between the plate that is unclean and the plate that is clean, saying first, if the plate is clean, then you shall have dessert.

But of the unclean plate, the laws are these:

If ye have eaten most of your meat, and two bites of your peas with each bite consisting of not less than three peas each, or in total six peas, eaten where I can see, and you have also eaten enough of your potatoes to fill two forks, both fork fulls eaten where I can see, then ye shall have dessert.

But if ye eat a lesser number of peas, and yet ye eat the potatoes, still ye shall not have dessert; and if ye eat the peas, yet leave the potatoes uneaten, ye shall not have dessert, no, verily I say unto you, not even a small portion thereof!

And if thou tries to deceive by moving the potatoes or peas around with a fork, that it may appear that thou hast eaten what thou hast not, ye will fall into iniquity.

And I will know, and ye shall have no dessert.

*On Screaming*

Do not scream; for it is as if you scream all the time.

If ye are given a plate on which two foods ye do not wish to touch each other are touching each other, and your voice rises up even unto the ceiling, while ye point to the offense with the finger of your right hand; but I say unto you, scream not, only remonstrate gently with the server, that the server may correct his transgression and peace shall prevail throughout the land.

Likewise if ye receive a portion of fish from which every piece of herbal seasoning has not been scraped off, and the herbal seasoning is loathsome to you and steeped in vileness, again I say, verily, refrain from screaming.

Though the vileness overwhelm you, and cause you a faint unto death, make not that sound from within your throat, neither cover your face, nor press your fingers to your nose.

For even as I have made the fish, and it is as it should be; behold, I eat it myself, yet do not die.

*Concerning Face and Hands*

Cast your countenance upward unto the light, and lift your eyes to the hills, that I may more easily wash you off.

For the stains are upon you; even to the very back of your head, and there is rice thereon.

And in the breast pocket of your garment, and upon the tie of your shoe, rice and other fragments are distributed in a manner beyond comprehension!

Only hold thyself still; hold still, I say.

Give unto each finger in its turn for my examination thereof, and also each thumb.

Lo, how iniquitous they appear.

What I do is as it must be; and you shall not go henceforth until I have done.

*Various Other Laws, Statutes, and Ordinances*

Bite not, lest you be cast into quiet time.

Neither drink of your own bath water, nor of the bath water of any beast of the field, or any fowl of the air nor of any kind; nor rub your feet on bread, even if it be in the package; nor rub your feet against cars, not against any building; nor eat sand.

Leave the cat alone, for what hath the cat done, that you should go forth and afflict it so and bindeth it with tape?

And hum not the humming in your nose as I read, nor stand between the light and the book.

Verily I say unto you, you will drive me to madness.

Neither forget what I said about the tape.

[Ian Frazier, "Laws Concerning Food and Drink: Household Principles, Lamentations of the Father," The Atlantic Monthly, February 1997, Volume 279, No. 2, pages 89-90.]

Received from S.McEntire.

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113

Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA

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CHURCH UPGRADE
The elderly priest, speaking to the younger priest, said, "It was a good idea to replace the first four pews with plush bucket theater seats. It worked like a charm. The front of the church always fills first now."
The young priest nodded, and the old priest continued, "And you told me adding a little more beat to the music would bring young people back to church, so I supported you when you brought in that rock'n'roll gospel choir. Now our services are consistently packed to the balcony."
"Thank you, Father," answered the young priest. "I am pleased that you are open to the new ideas of youth."
"All of these ideas have been well and good," said the elderly priest, "But I'm afraid you've gone too far with the drive-thru confessional."
"But, Father," protested the young priest, "my confessions and the donations have nearly doubled since I began that!"
"Yes," replied the elderly priest, "And I appreciate that. But the flashing neon sign, 'Toot 'n Tell or Go to Hell' cannot stay on the church roof

Thanks to David Lamb
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Welcome to You Make Me Laugh, a free newsletter from Crosswalk.com, the world's largest Christian website.

*Tap Away*

During an attack of laryngitis I lost my voice completely for two days. To help me communicate with him, my husband devised a system of taps.

One tap meant, "Give me a kiss," two taps meant "Yes," seven taps meant "No," and 95 taps meant "Take out the garbage."

(-:][:-)

*Come About*

A young man who wants to see the world signs on to a steamship to be trained as a helmsman. He masters the classroom instruction, then starts his practical training on the wheel of the vessel. In his first lesson, the mate gives him a heading, and the young fellow holds to it. Then the mate orders, "Come starboard."

Pleased at knowing immediately which way starboard is, the young man leaves the helm and walks over to his instructor.

The mate has an incredulous look on his face as the helm swings freely. Then, rather gently considering the circumstance, he asks politely, "Could you bring the ship with you?"

(-:][:-)

*Social Showdown*

Two older women, Coleen and Melinda, who were rivals in a social circle met at a Christmas party at their country club.

"My dear," said Melinda, "Are those real pearls?"

"They are," replied Coleen.

"Of course the only way I could tell would be for me to bite them," smiled Melinda.

Coleen responded, "Yes, but for that you would need real teeth."

(-:][:-)

*Order Debt*

A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money.

The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn't been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, "We can't ship your new order until you pay for the last one."

The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, "Please cancel the order. We can't wait that long."

(-:][:-)

*Lost Hunting*

My uncle Joe and his best buddy, Bubba, went hunting a couple of weeks ago. Somehow they got lost. Uncle Joe reassured his buddy, though. "Don't worry. All we have to do is shoot into the air three times, stay where we are, and someone will find us."

They shot in the air three times, but no one came. After a while, they tried it again. Still no response. When they decided to try once more, Bubba said, "It better work this time. We're down to our last three arrows."

(-:][:-)

Eye Laugh

"Cheap Plan"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g06.php?id=2

"Cat Clear"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=256

"Dog Angel"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=257

"Do Not Enter"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=258

"Gourd's Van"
http://www.cybersalt.org/g05.php?id=259

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Daily devotionals are available at http://link.Crosswalk.Com/UM/T.asp?A1. 39. 17757. 1. 494611 You can access more information on Crosswalk's Fun page http://www.Crosswalk.Com/fun/! Crosswalk gives credit to the author of a joke when author is known. Feel free to send notification to admin@cybersalt.org in cases where credit has not been given to the author! -SUBSCRIPTION INFO- * Copyright2004 Crosswalk.Com, Inc. and its Content Providers. All rights reserved. Introducing www.Crossguide.Com Where Christians find Products, Services & Ministries.
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"Don't strive for recognition, but work for achievement." -- Vanessa Malone
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/mscareerperson.html - - Ms. CareerPerson Answer Your Questions "Lately I've been getting lots of e-mail from women who'd like to return to the work-force. My first instinct is to ask: Why on earth would you want to do that..."
http://www.madkane.com
http://www.madkane.com/notable.html (Notables Weblog)
http://www.madkane.com/bush.html (Dubya's Dayly Diary)
Subscribe to MadKane Humor Newsletter (weekly) here:
http://www.madkane.com/email.html
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Famous Trials - - http://www.law.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/ftrials.htm - - This is an educational and non-commercial site maintained at the University of Missouri-Kansas City Law School. The Web's largest and most visited collection of materials relating to famous trials, from Socrates to Clinton. The site includes original essays, images, primary documents, maps, transcript excerpts, chronologies, video clips, court decisions, and other materials to aid readers in understanding the significance of historic trials.
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Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences - - http://www.oscars.org/ - - Official site of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, the organization that presents the Oscars. Includes a special section on the annual Academy Awards and Student Academy Awards.
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Women's History Month: March 2006 - - http://www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/releases/archives/facts_for_features_special_editions/006232.html - - In 1981, the U.S. Congress passed a resolution establishing National Women's History Week. The week was chosen to coincide with International Women's Day, March 8. In 1987, Congress expanded the week to a month. Every year since, Congress has passed a resolution for Women's History Month, and the U.S. president has issued a proclamation.
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Lessons Learned: The Federal Response to Hurricane Katrina - - http://www.whitehouse.gov/reports/katrina-lessons-learned/ - - On August 23, 2005, Hurricane Katrina formed as a tropical storm off the coast of the Bahamas. Over the next seven days, the tropical storm grew into a catastrophic hurricane that made landfall first in Florida and then along the Gulf Coast in Mississippi, Louisiana, and Alabama, leaving a trail of heartbreaking devastation and human suffering. Katrina wreaked staggering physical destruction along its path, flooded the historic city of New Orleans, ultimately killed over 1,300 people, and became the most destructive natural disaster in American history. This February 2006 report from the executive branch investigates and discusses the federal government response to Hurricane Katrina.
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Disputes: International - - http://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/fields/2070.html - - The web page from the CIA World Factbook, outlines all the territorial disputes and wars taking place in the world today, from Afghanistan to Zimbabwe.
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Virtual Earth - - http://virtualearth.msn.com/ - - Virtual Earth combines mapping and local search to put the answers to your search questions in a geographical context. To do this, Virtual Earth combines MSN Search with the latest in mapping to create a new Web application built on Microsoft technology. Related site: Google Maps.
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HealthierUS.Gov - - http://www.healthierus.gov/ - - If you just look at the numbers, it can be overwhelming. Obesity is epidemic in the United States. In recent years, diabetes rates among people ages 30 to 39 rose by 70%. About 46.5 million adults in the United States smoke cigarettes, even though this single behavior will result in disability and premature death for half of them. More than 60% of American adults do not get enough physical activity, and more than 25% are not active at all. Yet if you talk to Americans, there is hope. They say they generally know what will make them healthier, but they are confused about what specific information is credible and accurate. This site is a source of credible, accurate information to help you choose to live healthier lives.
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------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 8, 2006
excerpt from this week's Scambusters newsletter. http://www.scambusters.org

Kevin Campbell
Information Technology Services
Albemarle Corporation

Using a Cell Phone to Dial 911

"As a law enforcement officer, I thought I should send this info along. Although it IS a good idea to have a cell phone next to your bed, remember that your address will not show up on the 911 screen. That can cause a delay during an emergency.

"Also in most states, the call will go to the Highway Patrol or State Trooper, not your local police agency, which will cause a delay while they transfer your call.

"From home, you should always use your land line phone first and your cell phone only if the land line is not working or unavailable."

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------
March 8, 2006
Dealing With Stress
Today's Safety From the Heart message is from Pam Kemp.

Some ways of dealing w/the stresses and burdens in life: The Light Side

* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see them again, it was probably worth it.
* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
* Never buy a car you can't push.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
* We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

IN OTHER WORDS - TAKE TIME TO TAKE TIME- SAVE SOME OF THE STRESSES FOR TOMORROW>>>TODAY HAS ENOUGH.

------------ Safety From The Heart ----------

Do Food Expiration Dates Really Matter?

Experts provide a guide to the variety of confusing 'freshness' dates on food. By Star Lawrence
WebMD Feature Reviewed By Brunilda Nazario, MD

You open the fridge, drag out the cottage cheese, check for fur, and if there isn't any, you say, "Honey? Will you sniff this?" This is not, however, the approved method of checking for freshness. The approved way lies in a voluntary system of labeling.

Yes, voluntary. The only items required by federal law to be labeled for expiration are infant formula and some baby foods; some states also mandate pulling dairy from store shelves on the expiration date.

Learn the Lingo of Expiration Dates

This brings us to terminology. The actual term "Expiration Date" refers to the last date a food should be eaten or used. Last means last -- proceed at your own risk.

Other, more commonly spotted terms are:

"Sell by" date. The labeling "sell by" tells the store how long to display the product for sale. You should buy the product before the date expires. This is basically a guide for the retailer, so the store knows when to pull the item. This is not mandatory, so reach in back and get the freshest. The issue is quality of the item (freshness, taste, and consistency) rather than whether it is on the verge of spoiling. Paul Van Landingham, EdD, a senior faculty member at the Center for Food and Beverage Management of Johnson & Wales University in Providence, R.I., tells WebMD the "sell by" date is the last day the item is at its highest level of quality, but it will still be edible for some time after.
"Best if used by (or before)" date. This refers strictly to quality, not safety. This date is recommended for best flavor or quality. It is not a purchase or safety date. Sour cream, for instance, is already sour, but can have a zippier, fresh taste when freshly sour (if that's not an oxymoron!)
"Born on" date. This is the date of manufacture and has been resurrected recently to date beer. Beer can go sub-par after three months. "It is affected by sun," Van Landingham says. The light can reactivate microorganisms in the beer. That's why you have to be especially careful with beer in clear bottles, as opposed to brown or green.
"Guaranteed fresh" date. This usually refers to bakery items. They will still be edible after the date, but will not be at peak freshness.
"Use by" date. This is the last date recommended for the use of the product while at peak quality. The date has been determined by the manufacturer of the product.
"Pack" date. You will find this one on canned or packaged goods, as a rule, but it's tricky. In fact, it may be in code. It can be month-day-year-MMDDYY. Or the manufacturer could revert to the Julian calendar. January would then be 001-0031 and December 334-365. It gets even weirder than that.

How Long Are Foods OK to Eat?

If you are not up on your Julian calendar and dating seems sort of a hodgepodge, how about memorizing some basic rules?

Milk. Usually fine until a week after the "Sell By" date.
Eggs. OK for 3-5 weeks after you bring them home (assuming you bought them before the "sell by" date). Van Landingham says double-grade As will go down a grade in a week but still be perfectly edible.
Poultry and seafood. Cook or freeze this within a day or two.
Beef and pork. Cook or freeze within three to five days.
Canned goods. Highly acidic foods like tomato sauce can keep 18 months or more. Low-acid foods like canned green beans are probably risk-free for up to five years. "You do not want to put cans in a hot place like a crawl space or garage," Peggy Van Laanen, EdD, RD, a professor of food and nutrition at Texas A&M University in College Station, Texas, tells WebMD. She suggests keeping canned and dry food at 50 to 70 degrees Fahrenheit in a dry, dark place. Humidity can be a factor in speeded-up deterioration. The FDA notes that taste, aroma, and appearance of food can change rapidly if the air conditioning fails in a home or warehouse. Obviously, cans bulging with bacteria growth should be discarded, no matter what the expiration date!

Food Safety Tips

Since product dates don't give you a true guide to safe use of a product, here are some other tips from the U.S. Department of Agriculture Food Safety and Inspection Services:

Purchase the product before the date expires.
If perishable, take the food home immediately after purchase and refrigerate it promptly. Freeze it if you can't use it within times recommended on the chart.
Once a perishable product is frozen, it doesn't matter if the date expires because foods kept frozen continuously are safe indefinitely.
Follow handling recommendations on product.

Storage Times After Purchase
Poultry 1 or 2 days
Beef, Veal, Pork, and Lamb 3 to 5 days
Ground Meat and Ground Poultry 1 or 2 days
Fresh Variety Meats (Liver, Tongue, Brain, Kidneys, Heart, Chitterlings) 1 or 2 days
Cured Ham, Cook-Before-Eating 5 to 7 days
Sausage from Pork, Beef or Turkey, Uncooked 1 or 2 days
Eggs 3 to 5 weeks

When Do Other Vital Items Go Bad?

The FDA does require that drugs carry an expiration date. Alan Goldhammer, PhD, associate vice president for regulatory affairs of the Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America (PhRMA), tells WebMD that safety, purity, and potency must be tested and established over time by drug manufacturers. If a drug says the expiration date is 18 months hence, it means these three qualities can only be guaranteed that long, assuming the drug is stored properly.

Some critics have accused drug manufacturers of hyping these dates to encourage more drug sales. Goldhammer implies that some drugs may be OK longer than noted, but the manufacturers have not done, say, a 10-year study of how long the drug is good. "They try to establish a reasonable date to allow for time in the supply chain and pharmacy shelves," he says.

The chemicals in drugs do break down and change over time, becoming more potent (or poisonous) or ineffective. "One of the worst places to store them," Goldhammer offers, "is in the medicine cabinet, which can be hot and humid. Consumers should not let drugs sit around. Why do you think most companies sell them a month or at most three months ahead of time?"

Van Landingham also notes that humidity can hurt drugs. "That's why they have cotton in them," he explains.

What about condoms, where a misjudgment could be disastrous? All condoms, the FDA says, have either an expiration or a manufacturing date. They should not be used beyond the expiration date -- more than five years after the date of manufacture.

The sweetener aspartame, another common item often found in sodas, does break down and become icky-tasting, so don't buy or drink old products containing it.

Stretching the Expiration Date Through Proper Storage

Van Landingham is picky about letting food get too hot. The "temperature danger zone" is between 41 and 140 degrees Fahrenheit. Food needing refrigeration should be kept below 41 degrees. On the loading dock, in the car, on the kitchen table, it should not be outside of that temperature for more than four hours total. You have no idea how long it may have been subjected to higher temperatures before you buy it, so you need to minimize the "standing" factor after you get it.

"One of the biggest mistakes consumers make is lag time," Van Laanen agrees. For details, she highly recommends Safe Home Food Storage, a Texas A&M book available from tcebookstore.org.

Van Landingham also warns that most fridges usually aren't holding at 41 degrees or less. "Don't forget recovery time," he says. That's the time it takes to recool after you stand there trying to find a cold beer or decide whether anyone will miss the last piece of cake.

Milk should be kept at 38 degrees, fish at 32 degrees. The drawers and shelves have different temperatures, thus the term "meat drawer."

Van Laanen urges consumers to scribble on their own date of purchase, even on canned goods.

Don't be too cautious. "Some people keep apples five days and go, "Oops, time to go,'" Van Landingham says. "They may still be in mint condition."

He recommends using your senses (this would be the "Honey, sniff this" thing) to decide if an item is fresh.

Oh, and that insufferable air-tight packaging? It has a use beyond building character in those attempting to remove it. "This can double shelf life," Van Landingham says. "The item will be good as the day it was packaged."

Star Lawrence is a medical journalist based in the Phoenix area.

Published Aug. 15, 2005.
http://www.webmd.com/content/Article/110/109544.htm?
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Our Church, Magnolia Christian Center, has the following mission statement. Our purpose is to build a great church for the glory of God through the great commission and the great commandment. MCC' Vision - That MCC will be a place hopping with children, energized with teenagers, balanced with diversity and transformed by the power of God! We want to turn uninterested people into interested people and win the lost to make fully devoted followers of Christ. www.mcc2000.net
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Daphne Roberts sent us this “FIREARMS REFRESHER COURSE”

1. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.
2. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.
3. Glock: The original point and click interface.
4. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.
5. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
6. If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words.
7. Free men do not ask permission to bear arms.
8. If you don't know your rights, you don't have any.
9. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.
10. The United States Constitution (c) 1791: All Rights reserved.
11. What part of "... shall not be infringed ..." do you not understand?
12. The Second Amendment is in place in case they ignore the others.
13. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.
14. Guns only have two enemies: rust and liberals.
15. Know guns, know peace and safety. No guns, no peace nor safety.
16. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.
17. 911 - government sponsored Dial-a-Prayer.
18. Assault is a behavior, not a device.
19. Criminals love gun control -- it makes their jobs safer
20. If guns cause crime, then matches cause arson.
21. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens tries to control them.
22. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.
23. Enforce the "gun control laws" we have, don't make more.
24. When you remove the people's right to bear arms, you create slaves.
25. The American Revolution would never have happened with gun control
26. ".. a government of the PEOPLE, by the PEOPLE, for the PEOPLE..."

PLEASE PASS THIS 'REFRESHER' TO FREE CITIZENS
Keep our service men and women in our thoughts.
Protect Americans, not terrorists
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Genevieve White, one of our favorite nursing administrators, shared this with us.

When I was little, I used to believe in the concept of one best friend, and then I started to become a woman. And then I found out that if you allow your heart to open up, God would show you the best in many friends.
One friend is needed when you're going through things with your man.
Another friend is needed when you're going through things with your mom.
Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be.
One friend will say, "Let's cry together," another, "Let's fight together," another, "Let's walk away together."
One friend will meet your spiritual need, another your shoe fetish, another your love for movies, another will be with you in your season of confusion, another will be your clarifier, another the wind beneath your wings.
But whatever their assignment in your life, on whatever the occasion, on whatever the day, or wherever you need them to meet you with their gym shoes on and hair pulled back, or to hold you back from making a complete fool of yourself .. those are your best friends.

It may all be wrapped up in one woman, but for many, it's wrapped up in several... one from 7th grade, one from high school, several from the college years, a couple from old jobs, on some days your mother, on some days your neighbor, on others, your sisters, and on some days, your daughters.
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This is really neat...And very true... Have a seat...relax...and read this slowly. It kind a sums it all up..........

I believe - That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I believe - That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I believe - That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I believe - That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe - That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe - That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I believe - That you can keep going long after you think you can't.
I believe - That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe - That either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe - That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I believe - That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I believe - That money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe - That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I believe - That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.
I believe - That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe - That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I believe - That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe - That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I believe - That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I believe - That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I believe - That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I believe - That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe - That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I believe - That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe - That even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.
I believe - That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I believe - That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
I believe in a loving God, and that we are cherished regardless of how crappy we are or what we may have done, He loves us unconditionally. So, in a word, relax. Give your heart to God, and know that you are cherished! Period.!!

Thanks to Trina Montgomery
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Prescribed by the Great Physician

~*~A GREAT RECIPE~*~

Fold two hands together,
And express a dash of sorrow.
Marinate it overnight,
And work on it tomorrow.

Chop one grudge in tiny pieces,
Add several cups of love.
Dredge with a large sized smile,
Mix with the ingredients above.

Dissolve the hate within you,
By doing a good deed.
Cut in and help your friend,
If he/she should be in need.

Stir in laughter, love and kindness,
>From the heart it has to come.
Toss with genuine forgiveness,
And give your friends some.

The amount of people served,
Will depend on you.
It can serve the whole wide world.
If you really want it to!!!

author unknown

"God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change ... the courage to change the one I can ... and the wisdom to know it's Me." Have a great day!!! The SON is shining and he can certainly use you!

Thanks to Trina Montgomery
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THIS WILL OPEN OUR EYES!!
Love, Trina

A man was exploring caves by the seashore. In one of the caves he found a canvas bag with a bunch of hardened clay balls. It was like someone had rolled clay balls and left them out in the sun to bake.

They didn't look like much, but they intrigued the man, so he took the bag out of the cave with him. As he strolled along the beach, he would throw the clay balls one at a time out into the ocean as far as he could.

He thought little about it, until he dropped one of the clay balls and it cracked open on a rock. Inside was a beautiful, precious stone!

Excited, the man started breaking open the remaining clay balls. Each contained a similar treasure. He found thousands of dollars worth of jewels in the 20 or so clay balls he had left. Then it struck him.

He had been on the beach a long time. He had thrown maybe 50 or 60 of the clay balls with their hidden treasure into the ocean waves. Instead of thousands of dollars in treasure, he could have taken home tens of thousands, but he had just thrown it away!

It's like that with people. We look at someone, maybe even ourselves, and we see the external clay vessel. It doesn't look like much from the outside. It isn't always beautiful or sparkling, so we discount it.

We see that person as less important than someone more beautiful or stylish or well known or wealthy. But we have not taken the time to find the treasure hidden inside that person.

There is a treasure in each and every one of us. If we take the time to get to know that person, and if we ask God to show us that person the way He sees them, then the clay begins to peel away and the brilliant gem begins to shine forth.

May we not come to the end of our lives and find out that we have thrown away a fortune in friendships because the gems were hidden in bits of clay.
May we see the people in our world as God sees them.
I am so blessed by the gems of friendship I have with each of you.

Thank you for looking beyond my clay vessel.

Thanks to Trina Montgomery
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The Importance of Activity
by Jennifer May, M.S., R.D., M.S.

By now, you are probably aware that regular exercise—about three hours of aerobic activity per week—is an essential part of a weight loss program. However, if you hit the gym every day but spend the rest of your day at your desk, in the car, or on the couch, then you're still not reaping the full benefits of an active lifestyle. Here are the Activity Pyramid recommendations for adding movement to your lifestyle:

Every day: Find extra ways to be active—take the stairs instead of the elevator, park further away, walk the dog, play with your kids, hide the remote control, etc.
Three to five times per week: Accumulate a total of 30 minutes of aerobic exercise—walking, jogging, biking, etc.
Two to three times per week: Light leisure activities such as golf, bowling, gardening, etc.
Two to three times per week: Strength and flexibility training activities such as weightlifting, yoga, Pilates, etc.
Cut down on: Sitting for more than 30 minutes at a time—watching TV, surfing the Internet, etc.*

If you take a few minutes to assess your typical day, you may find that you're doing fine with aerobic exercise, strength training, and stretching, but you may not be spending enough time on light leisure activities or just being active. And it's highly likely that you sit for long stretches! Here are some tips for incorporating these recommendations into your life:

Park your car further out in the parking lot when you hit the stores. So many of us drive around for 10 minutes just waiting for that perfect spot!

Walk up and down all of the aisles at the grocery store—just be sure not to add unnecessary items to your cart along the way!

Take a walk on your lunch break.

Get up from your desk during the day and take a walk down the hall. This is not only good for the body but also for the mind!

Take a walk in the evening. This can be a great way to unwind and spend time with your family. The kids can ride their bikes, walk along with mom and/or dad, or ride in a wagon.

Play with the kids and encourage them to be active. Sitting in front of the television set does nothing to enhance physical health. Children need activity just as much as we do, and many are not getting enough. Remember that you are the best role model!

Push that lawnmower and shovel that snow! It's very easy to hire someone to handle these tasks, but they are great ways to get some extra exercise. Be careful with shoveling, however, if you have heart trouble—always check with your physician before engaging in strenuous activity.

Enjoy golf? Walk the course and leave the cart at the clubhouse. Those miles can really add up! Miniature golf may not be as strenuous, but it is still more active than sitting at the computer or in front of the TV...plus it's great fun for the kids!
Education doesn’t have to be a sedentary pursuit. If the weather is nice, head to the zoo and learn all about the animals as you walk from exhibit to exhibit. If the weather is poor, take your walk at a museum and bone up on art, history, or science.

Do you live close to the store? If you have a safe path to travel on, ride your bike or walk. Any bags that you bring back can be great muscle builders!

Take advantage of your local parks. Many communities have great walking and biking trails.

* Bear in mind that the Activity Pyramid is designed to promote general health, not weight loss. However, it is a great guideline for adding more activity to your lifestyle and limiting your sedentary activities.

--------------------------------------
Jennifer May, M.S., R.D., M.S. is the Manager of Nutrition Services for DietWatch.com. Jennifer has provided nutrition and fitness counseling in a variety of settings, including medical facilities, assisted living communities, health and wellness organizations, and educational institutions. She has also produced articles, newsletters, and other educational materials and has appeared on radio and television. Jennifer holds two master's degrees from Indiana University, one in nutrition science and one in exercise physiology.

http://www.dietwatch.com/dietwatch/diet/dietnews.asp?show=activity.html&AfilliateReferer=lsV4_9
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For many years Ben Stein has written a biweekly column called "Monday Night At Morton's." (Morton's is a famous chain of Steakhouses known to be frequented by movie stars and famous people from around the globe.) Now, Ben is terminating the column to move on to other things in his life. Reading his final column is worth a few minutes of your time.

Ben Stein's Last Column...
ben stein at hollywood's a-list table

How Can Someone Who Lives in Insane Luxury Be a Star in Today's World?

As I begin to write this, I "slug" it, as we writers say, which means I put a heading on top of the document to identify it. This heading is "eonlineFINAL," and it gives me a shiver to write it. I have been doing this column for so long that I cannot even recall when I started.

I loved writing this column so much for so long I came to believe it would never end.
Lew Harris, who founded this great site, asked me to do it maybe seven or eight years ago, and I loved writing this column so much for so long I came to believe it would never end.

But again, all things must pass, and my column for E! Online must pass. In a way, it is actually the perfect time for it to pass. Lew, whom I have known forever, was impressed that I knew so many stars at Morton's on Monday nights.

He could not get over it, in fact. So, he said I should write a column about the stars I saw at Morton's and what they had to say.

It worked well for a long time, but gradually, my changing as a person and the world's change have overtaken it. On a small scale, Morton's, while better than ever, no longer attracts as many stars as it used to. It still brings in the rich people in droves and definitely some stars.

I saw Samuel L. Jackson there a few days ago, and we had a nice visit, and right before that, I saw and had a splendid talk with Warren Beatty in an elevator, in which we agreed that Splendor in the Grass was a super movie.

But Morton's is not the star galaxy it once was, though it probably will be again.

Beyond that, a bigger change has happened. I no longer think Hollywood stars are terribly important. They are uniformly pleasant, friendly people, and they treat me better than I deserve to be treated. But a man or woman who makes a huge wage for memorizing lines and reciting them in front of a camera is no longer my idea of a shining star we should all look up to.

How can a man or woman who makes an eight-figure wage and lives in insane luxury really be a star in today's world, if by a "star" we mean someone bright and powerful and attractive as a role model?

Real stars are not riding around in the backs of limousines or in Porsches or getting trained in yoga or Pilates and eating only raw fruit while they have Vietnamese girls do their nails. They can be interesting, nice people, but they are not heroes to me any longer.

A real star is the soldier of the 4th Infantry Division who poked his head into a hole on a farm near Tikrit, Iraq. He could have been met by a bomb or a hail of AK-47 bullets. Instead, he faced an abject Saddam Hussein and the gratitude of all of the decent people of the world.

A real star is the U.S. soldier who was sent to disarm a bomb next to a road north of Baghdad. He approached it, and the bomb went off and killed him.

A real star, the kind who haunts my memory night and day, is the U.S. soldier in Baghdad who saw a little girl playing with a piece of unexploded ordnance on a street near where he was guarding a station. He pushed her aside and threw himself on it just as it exploded. He left a family desolate in California and a little girl alive in Baghdad.

I no longer want to perpetuate poor values by pretending that who is eating at Morton's is a big subject.
The stars who deserve media attention are not the ones who have lavish weddings on TV but the ones who patrol the streets of Mosul even after two of their buddies were murdered and their bodies battered and stripped for the sin of trying to protect Iraqis from terrorists.

We put couples with incomes of $100 million a year on the covers of our magazines. The noncoms and officers who barely scrape by on military pay but stand on guard in Afghanistan and Iraq and on ships and in submarines and near the Arctic Circle are anonymous as they live and die.

I am no longer comfortable being a part of the system that has such poor values, and I do not want to perpetuate those values by pretending that who is eating at Morton's is a big subject.

There are plenty of other stars in the American firmament. The policemen and women who go off on patrol in South Central and have no idea if they will return alive. The orderlies and paramedics who bring in people who have been in terrible accidents and prepare them for surgery. The teachers and nurses who throw their whole spirits into caring for autistic children. The kind men and women who work in hospices and in cancer wards.

Think of each and every fireman who was running up the stairs at the World Trade Center as the towers began to collapse.

Now you have my idea of a real hero.

Last column, I told you a few of the rules I had learned to keep my sanity. Well, here is a final one to help you keep your sanity and keep you in the running for stardom: We are puny, insignificant creatures.

We are not responsible for the operation of the universe, and what happens to us is not terribly important. God is real, not a fiction, and when we turn over our lives to Him, he takes far better care of us than we could ever do for ourselves.

In a word, we make ourselves sane when we fire ourselves as the directors of the movie of our lives and turn the power over to Him.

I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters. This is my highest and best use as a human.
I can put it another way. Years ago, I realized I could never be as great an actor as Olivier or as good a comic as Steve Martin--or Martin Mull or Fred Willard--or as good an economist as Samuelson or Friedman or as good a writer as Fitzgerald. Or even remotely close to any of them.

But I could be a devoted father to my son, husband to my wife and, above all, a good son to the parents who had done so much for me. This came to be my main task in life.

I did it moderately well with my son, pretty well with my wife and well indeed with my parents (with my sister's help). I cared for and paid attention to them in their declining years. I stayed with my father as he got sick, went into extremis and then into a coma and then entered immortality with my sister and me reading him the Psalms.

This was the only point at which my life touched the lives of the soldiers in Iraq or the firefighters in New York. I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters and that it is my duty, in return for the lavish life God has devolved upon me, to help others He has placed in my path. This is my highest and best use as a human.

As so many of you know, I am an avid Bush fan and a Republican. But I think the best guidance I ever got was from the inauguration speech of Democrat John F. Kennedy in January of 1961.

On a very cold and bright day in D.C., he said, "With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth...asking His blessing and His help but knowing that here on Earth, God's work must surely be our own."
And then to paraphrase my favorite president, my boss and friend Richard Nixon, when he left the White House in August 1974, with me standing a few feet away, "This is not goodbye. The French have a word for it--au revoir. We'll see you again."

Au revoir, and thank you for reading me for so long. God bless every one of you. We'll see you again.

Thanks to Waneta Reardon for sharing this with us.
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verse of the day -- Harley Hudson

For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written, “I will destroy the wisdom of the wise, And the cleverness of the clever I will set aside.” - - 1 Co 1:18-19 (NASB95)

Paul interrupts his rant on disunity and returns to his main teaching … and I do mean that the next few verses are key to understanding the entire teaching in the book of 1 Corinthians. I ask you to please pay attention for the next few days. This part of the series will not disturb you … much. It will lay the foundation for all that Paul will say about the eleven issues he will address in the remaining chapters.

There is a fundamental difference between the philosophy of the world and the philosophy of God. I know, that sounds a bit melodramatic and obvious, but hang in here for a few minutes. The whole problem the Corinthians were having is wrapped up in that simple statement. Corinth was a very worldly city. We know that from previous discussions. The Corinthian Christians were relatively recent converts to the Faith. They were caught between two cultures … and thought they could live with one foot in each. Paul is about to show them the error of their thinking.

Paul tells us that the “word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing …” Think about that statement for a moment. What is the “word of the cross”? What is “the cross”? Ah, the cross is the instrument of death that God used to make the ultimate sacrifice, Jesus. We know that Jesus died for our sins. So then, what is the “word of the cross”? We would recognize that as the Gospel of Jesus Christ. The word “gospel” literally means, “good news”. So, the Gospel is foolishness … “to those who are perishing”.

What does that mean? Who are the perishing? It is safe to assume that the perishing are those who are dying in their sinful condition. Why would this be “foolishness”? There are at least two reasons. The first reason might be that they don’t know they are perishing. Though you might find this hard to believe, stop and think for a minute. What is the nature of all mankind? Is physical life everlasting? No, we all know that we will eventually die. Were you worried about that when you were a teenager? Most teens think they are invincible, that they could never die. Were you worried about dying when you were twenty-something? Thirty-something? To be honest, at fifty-something, I wasn’t worried about dying until this fall … when I faced the possibility of dying – and even that was in retrospect. While lying in the hospital room, I wasn’t thinking of dying. It was only after I was released that I knew how serious my condition was. (Don’t worry, I’m fine now.) The point is this. Most people do not think they are perishing physically, so how could they possibly know that their worldly lifestyle was leading to eternal death?

Since this is true, we can now look at the second reason. How can the story of a man who claimed to be the Son of God dying on a cross as a criminal possibly do anything to help me? In the first place, I have no need of help. In the second place, the idea of this Jesus’ death solving my problems just doesn’t make sense. It defies logic. If I thought I was truly in trouble because of my lifestyle, I would see a psychologist and let him help me through this troubling time.

See what I mean? The Gospel is foolishness to those who don’t even know they are dying! Does all of this sound familiar? Does it sound like you before you found Jesus?

-=+=-

For consider your calling, brethren, that there were not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble; but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised God has chosen, the things that are not, so that He may nullify the things that are, so that no man may boast before God. - - 1 Co 1:26-29 (NASB95)

Paul is asking the Corinthians to look around at the fellowship of believers (your calling). In essence he is asking them who they see. Did they see philosophers? Did they count among their number governors, and senators, and judges? What about those who consider themselves open minded? Are they members of the body of Christ in Corinth?

Paul had left Athens, where the philosophers scoffed at the concept of a God who would sacrifice His own Son for the multitudes. Even the baser philosophers of Corinth laughed at the thought. No, the church was definitely missing the “educated” element of Corinthian society.

Nor were the powerful attending in great numbers. Remember, Christians were being persecuted … and that persecution would increase before it lessened in severity. How many times had Paul himself been imprisoned? I haven’t taken a good count, but it could not be counted on one pair of hands. No, the powerful had all they needed to be comfortable in life … and they didn’t care much about what happened after death.

And the open minded? Those were the persons who were willing to accept almost anyone of any faith of any bent. They were willing to adopt and adapt whatever great philosophy that came into town … but they rejected Christianity. Indeed, they though it foolish.

So, God choose the foolish things to “shame the wise”. It was the poor, the slaves, the common businessman, the tinker, the candlestick maker who God chose to spread the Good News of salvation in Jesus Christ. The message traveled from mouth to ear and city to city through these humble folk who would never impress the “important” people. They plied the faith through everyday living in the market place, not in great temples, and synagogues, and educational forums.

Paul now begins a series of contrasts: the foolish to confound the wise, the weak to shame the wise. God chose those things that the world rejected to “nullify” those things that the world accepts with open arms. Really, “nullify” does not do justice to the Greek word. Nullify gives the impression of “cancelling out” or “evening the score” or “neutralizing”. The Greek actually carries a feeling of “destroy”. Those things that are rejected by the world will destroy the philosophies, the powers, the greatness of the worldly things. Hmmmmmmm.

All of this really sounds familiar, doesn’t it? Ask any honest preacher and he will tell you that it is not the giving of the rich that drives church finances. It is the small tithes of the poor, the common man, the worker bee that makes any ministry possible. Sure, it is nice to receive the big endowments … but they usually come with strings. The “widow’s mite” has no strings. The first wants a “name” attached to the new youth building. The second is given out of love and humility and trust that God will use it to its best advantage.

It is not the college professors (my apologies to at least two exceptions to the rule who read these ramblings) who teach the children the basics of the faith. It is the young mother who is strapped for time raising three and a half kids who leads the children to Jesus. It is not the doctors who mend the widow’s fence; it is the workman who labors 8 or 10 hours then does it in the dark or on a Saturday.

It is not the politicians who give the simple testimonies that demonstrate God’s work in every day lives. It is the simple, the common, the ones deemed unacceptable by the elite society.

God’s wisdom vs. man’s wisdom. Which will prevail?

-=+=-

And when I came to you, brethren, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God. For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified. - - 1 Co 2:1-2 (NASB95)

Previously I mentioned that Paul came to Corinth from Athens. What I did not mention then but will now is this. Paul left Athens with totally different results than any other place he went. Paul was used to responses to his message. He usually established a church in every city. From the very beginning of his apostolic ministry his pattern was to preach the Word, first to the Jew then the Greek. His preaching resulted in “conversions”. Frequently he was driven from town because of the great response to his efforts. A few weeks later, Paul would return to the community and appoint elders. This didn’t happen in Athens.

Paul preached the Word, but he did it in the Acropolis, the meeting place of the learned. His message was received with curiosity and questions but few, if any, conversions. The most positive response was “We’d like to hear more about this.” Paul was not run out of town; he left.

When he arrived in Corinth, it is speculated, mostly from this chapter, that he was sick and weak. It is fair to believe that he was somewhat deflated by his reception in Athens where he had attempted to philosophize the Word to reach philosophers. The end result was that he entered Corinth humbled. “I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom.” As he approached the non-believers in Corinth, he wanted to present them with less of himself and more of Jesus. “For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified.”

Paul demonstrates for us the attitude we, as believers, should have when we approach unbelievers … we should know nothing except Jesus Christ … and Him crucified. Why? This action takes the “me” out of the presentation. Do you remember Paul’s statement that he was glad he had baptized no one in Corinth? Today’s verses and those for tomorrow tell us why. It was a furtherance of his determination to take the “Paul” out of the Gospel and let Jesus speak for himself. Jesus made a similar statement. “… and you will even be brought before governors and kings for My sake, as a testimony to them and to the Gentiles. ‘But when they hand you over, do not worry about how or what you are to say; for it will be given you in that hour what you are to say. For it is not you who speak, but it is the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you.’” (Mat. 10:18-20 NASB)

Paul has not left the topic of “wisdom” but is simply telling us how he, and by example how we, should approach the presentation of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Worldly wisdom tells us to take he credit for all that we do. God’s wisdom tells us to trust the Spirit of God to do the work for us. He is the one who knows the heart of God and the hearts of men. We are simply the spokesmen who speak what God tells us and nothing else.

-=+=-

Harley

c. 2006 Harley E. Hudson

If you received Verse of the Day as a forward and you wish to have your own subscription, simply send an e-mail to hhudson719@sbcglobal.net and request a free subscription.
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TOURBUS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -:) - :)- :)
Volume 11, Number 43 --- 07 March 2006
Tourbus Home - http://www.TOURBUS.com
Best of Tourbus -- http://tourbus.com/best.html
+---------------------------------------+

TODAY'S TOURBUS TOPICS: Car Buying and Stargazing

Thinking about buying or selling a car? Today's TOURBUS will help you get the best deal. Also in this issue, astronomy online, switching to Linux, how to avoid an LSASS kicking. Read on!
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Buying a Car, Selling a Car
-----------------------------

Are you thinking about buying a new car? If you're thinking of buying or selling an Acura, Audi, BMW, Buick, Cadillac, Chevrolet, Chrysler, Dodge, Ford, GMC , Honda, Hyundai, Infiniti, Isuzu, Jaguar, Jeep, Kia, Lexus, Lincoln, Mazda, Mercedes, Mercury, Mitsubishi, Nissan, Pontiac, Porsche, Saab, Saturn, Subaru, Toyota, VW, or Volvo...

...I'll point you to the websites you MUST visit before your trip to see the man in the polyester suit.
http://askbobrankin.com/buying_selling_car_online.html

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There Goes The Neighborhood
-----------------------------

I got a lot of comments on my "House Values" article, both positive and negative. A free online service that can estimate the value of your house is a very cool idea, but it seems to be ruffling the feathers of many real estate professionals.

Keep in mind the service is still in beta test, so the results may not be 100% accurate for every neighborhood. Try it on your house (or a neighbor's) and see what you think!

http://askbobrankin.com/house_values.html

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Attention Stargazers...
--------------------------

If you're an amateur astronomer, or you just enjoy looking up into the night sky, the Internet is full of resources for you. For the best star pictures, astronomy websites, user groups and telescope reviews, read all about Astronomy Online here:

http://askbobrankin.com/astronomy_online.html

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Linux: Time to Switch?
-------------------------

Every once in a while I mention Linux -- a free alternative to the Microsoft Windows operating system. It used to be that Linux was just for geeks. But modern Linux variants are easy to install, have friendly graphical interfaces, and come with a full suite of software for word processing, spreadsheets, email, web browsing and more.

Lots of people are switching to Linux because both the operating system and all the software you'll ever need are available for free. Others find it attractive because there are very few problems with viruses, spyware and security. If you're curious about Linux and would like to try it out, these articles will help you get started:

History of Linux
http://www.askbobrankin.com/history_of_linux.html

Where Can I Download Linux?
http://www.askbobrankin.com/where_can_i_download_linux.html

Help with Basic Linux Commands
http://www.askbobrankin.com/help_with_basic_linux_commands.html

-----------------------
Is LSASS.EXE a Virus?
-----------------------

A TOURBUS reader recently asked me this question about viruses:
"When I run the Windows XP Task Manager, I see a process named lsass.exe that is active. I'm worried that this might be a virus -- should I get rid of it?"

Ahh, poor LSASS... so much fear and uncertainty surrounds the topic. So it should be comforting that I can give you an authoritative "Probably Not" answer to that question. That's because lsass.exe is both an essential part of the Windows operating system, AND a nasty computer virus. So how can you be sure if your LSASS is good or evil? Here's the answer:

http://www.askbobrankin.com/what_is_lsass.html

+---------------------------------------+
That's all for now, see you next time! -- Bob Rankin

==[ Tourbus Rider Information ]==
The Internet Tourbus - U.S. Library of Congress ISSN #1094-2238 Copyright 1995-2005, Rankin & Crispen - All rights reserved Tourbus News Service - http://tourbus.com/news.html Subscribe, Signoff, Archives, Free Stuff and More at the Tourbus Website - http://www.TOURBUS.com
========================
.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~
{o_, \ { crispen@netsquirrel.com
/ , , ) \ http://www.netsquirrel.com/
`~ -' \ } )) AOL Instant Messenger: Squirrel2K
_( ( )_.'
---..{____} Warning: squirrels.
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Activities and Events of Interest
~~~
Albemarle Steak and Bingo Supper - April 22, 2006
~~~
The Emancipation Proclamation will be on display at the Clinton Library September 22-25, 2007.
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"September 11 WDYTJWD" W. P. Florence
Justice first, then peace."
"September 11" Never forget.--Tony Moses
"ONE NATION UNDER GOD ...the only way"--Phillip Story
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Keeping my head down but face toward Heaven" - - Jody Eldred, ABC News Cameraman in Kuwait
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink. mil/releases/

01. Spc. Christopher S. Merchant, 32, of Hardwick, Vt., died in AR. Ramadi, Iraq, on March 1, when his HMMWV came under attack by enemy forces using a vehicle-borne improvised explosive device and rocket-propelled grenade. Merchant was assigned to the Army National Guard's 3rd Battalion, 172nd Infantry Regiment, Jericho, Vt.

02. Lance Cpl. Matthew A. Snyder, 20, of Finksburg, Md., died March 3 from a non combat-related vehicle accident in Al Anbar province, Iraq. He was assigned to Combat Service Support Group-1, 1st Marine Logistics Group, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

03. Staff Sgt. Kevin P. Jessen, 28, of Paragould, Ark., died in Rawah, Iraq, on March 5, when an improvised explosive device detonated during combat operations. Jessed was assigned to the Army's 22nd Chemical Battalion (Technical Escort), Aberdeen Proving Ground, Md.

04. Staff Sgt. Dwayne P. R. Lewis, 26, of New York City, died in Baghdad, Iraq on Feb. 27, when his unit was attacked by enemy forces using small arms fire during a dismounted patrol. Lewis was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 22nd Infantry Regiment, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division, Fort Drum, N.Y.

The Department of Defense announced today the death of two Marines who were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom.
05. Gunnery Sgt. Justin R. Martone, 31, of Bedford, Va.
06. Gunnery Sgt. John D. Fry, 28, of Lorena, Texas
Martone died March 7 and Fry died March 8 from improvised explosive devices in Al Anbar province, Iraq. Martone was assigned to 9th Engineer Support Battalion, 3rd Marine Logistics Group, III Marine Expeditionary Force, Okinawa, Japan. Fry was assigned to 8th Engineer Support Battalion, 2nd Marine Logistics Group, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

07. Cpl. Adam O. Zanutto, 26, of Caliente, Calif., died March 6 at National Naval Medical Center, Bethesda, Md., from wounds received as a result of an improvised explosive device in Al Anbar province, Iraq on Feb. 25. He was assigned to 3rd Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, I Marine Expeditionary Force, Twentynine Palms, Calif.

08. Pfc. Ricky Salas, Jr. 22, of Roswell, N.M., died in Mosul, Iraq, on March 7, when an improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle while conducting mounted operations. Salas was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 37th Armored Regiment, Friedberg, Germany.

~~

Airman Lost In 1942 Crash Is Identified

The Department of Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office (DPMO) announced today that the remains of a U.S. Army Air Forces airman, missing since 1942, have been identified and will soon be returned to his family for burial.

He is Aviation Cadet Leo Mustonen, 22, of Brainerd, Minn. The family has not set a date for his burial.

Mustonen was one of four men aboard a routine navigation training flight that departed Mather Field, Calif., on Nov. 18, 1942. Their AT-7 Navigator aircraft carried about five hours of fuel, and when the plane did not return to base, a search was initiated. It was suspended about a month later with no results.

In 1947, several hikers on Darwin Glacier in the Sierra Nevada mountain range discovered the aircraft wreckage. Human remains of three of the crew found at the site were buried in the Golden Gate National Cemetery in San Bruno, Calif.

Several other hikers on Mendel Glacier, which is adjacent to Darwin Glacier, discovered frozen human remains, circumstantial evidence and personal effects in October 2005. Park rangers from Sequoia and Kings Canyon National Parks and a forensic anthropologist from the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command (JPAC) recovered the remains, which were later shipped to the JPAC laboratory in Hawaii.

Scientists from JPAC and the Armed Forces DNA Identification Laboratory also used mitochondrial DNA as one of the forensic tools in the process. U.S. Army casualty and mortuary officials located and briefed representatives of the families of all four crewmen.

For additional information on the Defense Department’s mission to account for missing Americans, visit the DPMO Web site at http://www.dtic.mil/dpmo or call (703) 699-1169.

http://icasualties.org/oif/default.aspx
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Please remember to pray for the American soldiers stationed everywhere around the globe and especially in Iraq. Times have been and are very tough and it would be nice if you would all just say a prayer for their safety and for their families.
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It’s never too early to start making my Anniversary Present list. (Well, I did get a new medicine bag for my birthday.)
Rechargeable Batteries for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (9.6 volts, 600 mAh battery, 2 each (for our two radios)), Yaesu FT-50 (it takes a FNB-83 7.2V1400mAh battery), Yaesu, VX-1 (it takes a FNB-52LI 3.6V 700mAh Lithium-Ion battery).
New “Rubber Ducky” antennas for the following “Ham” radios: Kenwood TH-22-AT (two radios)
Anything from Larry Norman
Back Scratcher
Basic tools of any kind
Batteries, 9 volt
Batteries, AAA
Blankets or Quilts
Book, “The Good Life: Seeking Purpose, Meaning, and Truth in Your Life” by Charles Colson
“Boot” Horn
Chair, office $49 from SAMS (5 of them)
Cheese Grater
Cordless Drill
Cordless Screwdriver
A DeLorme Earthmate GPS LT-20 device
A copy of DeLorme Street Atlas USA 2006 Plus
A copy of DeLorme Topo USA 5.0
Digital Video Recorder (Pioneer DVR-533H-S $333 at Beach Camera)
Eyeglasses, “Computer type” to use at church (and some new ones to use at home and at work.)
Floor Mats (for the truck)
A new “Gitter”
Handkerchiefs
Hasselblad H2D-39 Digital Professional Camera
Hat (warm, for bald guys winter wear.)
Magnifying Glass.
New Showerhead
Non skid toilet rug
Refrigerator Thermometer
Small, lightweight “head light” so I can see small things on the desk or work bench.
Some Warmup Suits to wear around the house after we get that first gas bill.
Trackball for the home computer
VHS - DVD Recorder (Lite-On LVC-9006 $219 @ Buy.com)
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Scheduled Activities
~~~
Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 8 p.m. Monday - Friday. At noon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays and at 7 p.m. Sunday at 914 N. Vine
~~~
Columbia County Amateur Radio Club meets Every second Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. Union Street Station. And YOU'RE invited. Net is every Sunday at 20:30 on 147.105.
~~~
Columbia County Diabetes Support Group - Every third Monday, 7:00 p.m. room 222, Magnolia Hospital
~~~
"Focus on the Family" with Dr. James Dobson weekday afternoons at 1 PM on KVMA am 630 it's a great show!
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MCC - Abraham Prayer - Sunday at 5:00 p.m and Wednesday from 11:30 am to 1:00 pm
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MCC - Early Morning Prayer - Monday - Friday, From 6:30 am to 8:00 am
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MCC - "Beth Moore" Video Class - Thursday nights at 5:45 pm
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MCC - "Faith Builders" Small group meets at 1051 Columbia 36 the second and fourth Tuesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:45 pm.
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MCC - Firm Foundations Class, Sunday 9:30 to 10:15 a.m
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MCC - Meadow Brook Nursing Home Ministry Tuesday from 10:00 to 11:00 a.m
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MCC - Mom's Day Out - Every Tuesday and Thursday from 9 to 2.$10 for the first child, $5 for the second. Call 234-3225 for reservations.
~~~
MCC - Nursing Home Ministry - Meadowbrook Every Tuesday from 10 to 11 am. Taylor, the last Thursday each month.
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MCC - Over comers: Fridays @ 7:00 p.m- Director, Traci Foster invites you to a 12 step Christian support program. For anyone with a life controlling problem. Child care is provided.
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Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
~~~
Narcotics Anonymous 5-6 pm every Monday at 220 Pine street.
~~~
TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 5 pm every Tuesday in the Magnolia Hospital break room.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in ... and how many want out." - - Tony Blair
"Information is the currency of democracy." - Jefferson
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.

God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
1 Th 4:11-12 Josh 7:6,7,10 1 Tim 6:12 Luke 19:1-6 Jer 33:2-3 Jer 33:2-3 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

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Let us hear from you if we can switch you over to the "Word" or "PDF" version of "Da Bleat".
If you'd prefer to read "Da Blog" version, just drop us a note at KC5HII@Magnolia-Net.Com and we'll switch you from e:mail delivery to "Da Bleat" Blog. Of course "Da Bleat" is now on the web. Just go to http://bugsbleat1q.blogspot.com to see the latest issue (usually updated sometime Friday evening or Saturday morning. We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you. This email was scanned by Norton AntiVirus 2005 before it was sent. ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>